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Germaine
JUST BREATHE 10/17/09
Seriously? Stop bloggn from my thgts, lol

A RISK WORTH TAKING 1/16/09
Seriously? Stop bloggn frm my thgts, lol!Crazy the things u write @ the right times!

MORE THAN A FRIEND 11/3/09
U alwys write blogs abt my life! Quit diggin in my head, lol
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Fanny Lynn
WHAT I LIKE ABOUT YOU 10/29/05
i love your emails... gets me through the toughest of times... much love...
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GIRL POWER 3/27/06
Ann (a.k.a. Anndi)
Hello my sweet friend!
Well all I can say is that we (some of us) mature and become wiser and as we grow older. At some point, if we are lucky, we realize that we also cannot live without men and that there are actually some great guys out there. You write beautifully and some day a woman will realize that.
Take care my dear! ____________________________________________________

STAND BY ME 4/20/06
Sue
Yoda...thank you for starting my day with a beautifully written story. This gives me hope that one day, I may meet "my best friend and life partner". God Bless you! HUGS!

Gail
Dante
Thank you very much for this. I am going through some inner strife of my own, and this is the motivation I needed to push me in the right direction. No truer words have been spoken (written)...

Patti
Hey Yoda,
I just now sat down to give this a good read and lots of thought. You are very articulate and makes me wonder if you are considering writing as a future career goal in your life.

This is profound writing. I see too many young people too willing to rush into relationships that have no solid foundation. I also see to many mistaking selfish obsessive feelings for that of true love and friendship. Love in it's purest and truest form is giving without taking - loving without expecting something in return. In that case, where you stand is really irrelevant You stand where you should stand, in the place you are standing. As long as you do that, the rest will stand with you.

But I see I'm getting too philosophical here. I think that's just a compliment to your writing as it inspires thinking. I do appreciate you putting me on your mailing list and I look forward to more of your thought-provoking ideas and musings. In much friendship,

Julie
Thank you so much for emailing this to me---so profound---you're a true gem and most certainly an inspiration to the kids you work with regardless of the absurd sheninegans displayed on the Soul Patrol thread! I read it when forced to sit still to do a blood pressure reading Sunday AM---not sure if it raised or lower it but nevertheless it is a masterpiece.

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YOU'LL BE IN MY HEART 5/11/06
Sueann
Oh man...it was like that was written for me...or about me, or both! I have been reluctant to enter another relationship because of past hurt and pain. But you are so right...to face the fear....is to live. Avoiding fear, not going straight into it, holds you back..puts your life on hold. Thank you so much! I'm going to face my fears and walk right through them into the arms of my "Soulmate".
HUGS!

Ann
Dear friend,
Thank you for putting into words what I've been feeling recently. Your writings always seem to come along at just the right time.
You have an inestimable talent dear one, she is a lucky girl, the 'Girl Next Door'.
I wish you happiness and a destiny filled with Love.
Thanks again.

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GO REST HIGH 6/1/06

Janice
Hi Dante,
Beautifully written. On May 14, I lost my fiancé who I had been living with for three years. I understand the pain you feel. My heart has been ripped out. I'm having a hard time getting back to "reality". It's really hard with someone so close. Sounds, smells, foods, general everyday habits, are constant reminders.

I find myself answering the phone, expecting him to be on the other end - telling me that he will be home soon - realizing only after the other person is talking, that I was thinking something impossible.

He died quite suddenly and absolutely unexpectedly. No health issues - at least nothing that would cause quick and sudden death. I left the house for 15 minutes, came home to find him collapsed. He had gotten a great bill of health at the doctor's office just 3 days before.

What makes the whole thing unreal and difficult to handle is not having close friends or family members of my own nearby. I was only his fiancé - I guess somehow that makes my loss in his family's eyes invalid somehow. Nevermind we completely shared our lives together for 3 years and knew each other longer than that. It's hard but I need to muster the strength to move on.

Shelly
Thank you Dante, I just recently lost a friend to cancer. For me, your thoughts were very poignant.

Pixie
This one hits hard and close to home. When I was 19, my best friend and another friend were killed by a drunk driver. I was supposed to be there with them that night, but a last minute dinner date with my (then) fiance changed that. I am still alive and they are dead. Why?

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HOME IS WHERE THE HEART IS 11/11/05
Pixie
I just love the way you see things. It is brilliant! I personally am one of the most hopeless romantics you may ever meet. I've fallen head over heels in love many times, had my heart broken just as many times. I've moved on to a second passport, you could say.

I believe that love is something that is both beautiful and dark. It can lift you up and make you feel like nothing can touch you, but it can also tear you apart, leaving you to feel like nothing but an outer shell.

No matter how much you are turned down for love though, you should always keep trying. Look at being turned down as being saved from terrible releationships, but then the day will come when you find the person that does not turn you down. It will be that person that will make all the others feel like nothing more than a small dark memory.

You are a brilliant and deep man, do not settle for anything beneath you. I believe that all people have someone out there and it may take longer for some than for others, and sometimes you may not even see the person the first time around so you have to wait for that second chance, but it will happen. Just wait and see.

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THE WAY IT IS 6/16/06
Sueann
Then, there are those men whose attributes, (other than "youth", a gorgeous face/bod etc.) definitely define him as a Hottie. I am "one of those women" (that you may have referred to in this article) that truly finds you, Yoda , a Hottie! Your writing takes me to a place that is soothing (excluding this article...LOL), shows me that life can take a turn and bring me up again, give me hope, where once there was no hope, and in general give me the slap across the face that I need to push on! Your disdain of the label "Hottie" when used in a superficial way, is understandable and I am in total agreement with you. If I have offened you by calling you a "HOTTIE"...well...I refuse to apologize! What is "inside" a man or a woman is what truly counts. In conclusion...I find your dimples extremely HOT!

Mary
Hiya Yoda!
I would like to put in my 2 cents here if you don't mind. Hottie can have a different meaning for everyone. When I use the term hottie I'm talking about someone I don't know but think is sexy. On the other hand, if I called a male friend a hottie, it would mean they have the total package. If a friend of yours called you a hottie I would take it as a compliment because if the person can still call you a hottie even after knowing you, that's a really good thing.

I can see why you would get upset if a friend called you a hottie because most of the time it means a person who is sexy and good looking with nothing to back it up, but, again, if you know that person well and can still call them a hottie, it's a great compliment. Hope I helped


Ann
Dante.. I don't take my riot gear out for many as far as men are concerned and God knows.. I've taken it out often enough for you. A man who can make me laugh the way you have, has dimples (yes dimples are hot), and writes beautifully is not "you're nice let's just be friends" material. You are a "let's grow old together, dance on the porch in our bathrobes as the sun sets" kind of man. Husband, lover, best friend, life partner and father kind of man. Now that is what really makes a man a "hottie" as far as I'm concerned.
Now don't question your status as a hottie.. Question the sanity of those women who were lucky enough to attract your attention. I know I do.

I've found someone that captured my heart as I told you on IM.. Hope he treats it well. But I must say, I've always had a crush on you.. And it's precisely because of the type of man you are and NOT something superficial. I can't believe I'm actually saying this to you... Out on a limb here..but I say it because you are a catch, I trust and I admire you. She'll come.. The one.. She might be there already...
Look under your nose.. She's right there, if you want her.

Now stop talking nonsense or I'll have to use the cattle prod on you
Ok.. I've embarrassed myself enough. Just do me a favor, and let me know when you do find her. I'll want to shake her hand.
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I'M STILL STANDING 6/21/06
Travis
Dante,
A friend forwarded your article "I'm Still Standing" to me - I just wanted to say that I appreciate what you wrote. Your words seem to be describing my life at the moment. I'm in the first weeks of what I hope is a very long relationship with a special lady.

I wasn't looking for it and I had convinced myself that I didn't need or want it. But the reality is that I've never really felt this way before. It's a rare thing to be able to sit in complete silence with another person, just occupying space together, without worrying about what to say or what to do. That comfort can't be forced, and I'm fortunate to have stumbled my way into it.

I truly appreciate your observations - I think you have a tremendous gift. Would you add me to your distribution list so I can continue to enjoy your insights?

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FEARLESS 6/26/06
Robin
Too many people miss out in this department. I have been hurt, but I also survived only to find my true soul mate! I am indeed blessed. Fearless, not sure, but I am happy that I jumped again!


Ann
Dante,
How is it my dear friend, that you seem to be writing about things as I'm thinking about them?Guess you really are magic! Much wisdom you have. Take your time, find that girl. Better yet, let her find you. Please remember... I want to shake that one's hand, she's bound to be spectacular. You deserve it. Thank you for sharing this with all of us, for sharing a part of yourself. And know you have a friend in the Great White North who would love to show you around Montreal if you ever make it up here.

Travis
Dante,
I've got these jitters right now. It's wonderful and it's magic - and it scares the living hell out of me. But I keep going back to her for more. Thanks again for the insights.


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YOU'LL THINK OF ME 7/6/06
Sueann
Aww Gee Yoda! Not fair! The subject matter brought back memories, some good, some not so good, but attaching the song...UNFAIR...made me cry.

So how do you feel about the "rebound" boyfriend or girlfriend...do they always lose? I was the rebound girl, and I feel deeply in love. My friends warned me...about the "rebound" boomerang and the hurt that would surely come to me. Did I listen to them? Of course not! Did I get hurt...oh yes...very much. Do I still hurt today from the effects of being the "rebound" girl....more than anyone knows.

I would love to hear your thoughts on this subject.

Thanks for always including me in your Emails, as I totally enjoy reading them! Oh and I still think/know you are a Hottie and miss seeing you!!!! Take care!
HUGS!


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X MARKS THE SPOT 7/13/06
Julie
Another literary masterpiece! How DO you DO it? You nailed it! I have my pirate, he just needs to find his zest for life, throw me over his shoulder and take me away for a while!

Robin
You really need to write a book! I would definately buy it, and I am traditionally not a big reader. Your writting capture me, draw me in to what you are feeling. You are truely blessed.

Travis
Dante,
Speaking from very recent experience - my swash has definitely been buckled! She completes me, and she says I'm the other half of her whole.
You continue to write the things that are in my thoughts. When you finally do swoop in and capture your damsel, she'll be lucky.
Thanks.


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MY FINAL THOUGHT 7/18/06
Dana
Don’t scare me like that!

Gail
You scared me!! I thought this was the last one you were sending!! Don't you do that to me!!
Nguyenquan ha
don't stop!!!!

Lora
Dude, Dante, don't scare me like that!!!

Shelly
Bravo!!!!! Whew, I thought I was gonna lose you... Thanks Dante.

Julie
...and my thanks to you, Dante, for NOT stopping!


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BREAK THE WALLS DOWN 7/23/06
Sue Ann
Another great one that tugs at my heart! Thank you!

This paragraph especially!

"In retrospect, when it comes to heartbreak, a broken trust, and/or loneliness you can feel like that you will never be able to get out from within those four walls to where you feel trapped. A person can spend so much time screaming and yelling for help that all you hear is the echo of your own voice boucing off the walls. It can truly be a frustrating and scary situation for any person in not knowing who will come to their rescue and save them from slipping into madness, in a manner of speaking. In the end, when it comes to the walls that surround you in complete darkness someone special will hear you and break the walls down so that you see, as well as, feel his or her bright, shining love."

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BECAUSE OF YOU 10/28/05
Lady Dama
How did you get in my head? This is excellent Yoda! You go boy!!!!

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BRING ME TO LIFE 7/29/06
Sue
Yoda! Love your writing. But I have to tell you, I feel like you have crawled into my brain and my heart. All of the recent writings you have sent out, have hit me hard, and are so on target with regards to my life right now, it is scarey! Keep 'em coming, my friend, please, keep 'em coming! Hugs,

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I'M NOT WORTHY 8/14/06
Sue
****trying to knock this one out of my head......now how did you get inside my head Yoda???????? Thank you for another wonderful writing!

____________________________________________________ ALL SHOOK UP 8/16/06
Travis
Whoa.
It's been two months now with me and my lady and I still feel all of this. And I don't ever want it to stop.

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STRANGER THAN FICTION 8/20/06
Robin
Once again you have sent out your thoughts at a time when I needed it the most. I haven't responded much to you, not because you have been out of my thoughts, but because work has kept me very busy lately. What free time I have had, I have spent making a record of our B'ham experience to share with my friends that were either unable to go, or who may have went, but didn't have the opportunity we did to capture video. This has been a very rewarding task.

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MAY I CUT IN 9/1/06
Gail
Dante --
Your eloquence always amazes me. Tears always flow when I read your messages. Keep them coming, honey. They give me hope that true love does exist.

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MAN LAW 9/7/06
Sandra
I’ll comment. That is why men make up 93% of the prison population and women are 7%. :P Loved the “Man Law” Yoda. Now off to go ask my hubby what the “buffer” zone is and make sure the boys are up to speed with these rules.

Meri
**snorts with contemptuous superiority at men and their precious "Man Laws" while carefully adhering to all the "Woman Laws" such as never, ever letting one's derriere touch a public toilet seat, until it has been properly wiped down and covered with clean tissue paper, cause everyone knows there are, like, a gazillion germs on a toilet seat (even thought urine is sterile) and Moms everywhere would have a conniption fit if any of their daughters' bums came in contact with even ONE of those gazillion germs!** LOL

Ann
*stands up, shakes head and frowns*

I'm disappointed in you Yoda and Travis.. You forgot two fundamental (and related) rules of men:
1. Never, ever, under penalty of a punishment worse than waxing one's chest is a man allowed to ask for directions.
And,
2. It is strictly forbidden to read any assembly instructions (which explains the jar of nuts, screws, bolts and nails that you seem to think you need.. They are leftovers from previous assemblies...)
Hand in your membership cards gentlemen... Sheesh, even I know this!!! For shame, for shame!!!

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THE DANCE 9/11/06
Meri
So true! So true, Yoda! Life is too short to be spent on worry and anxiety, or squabling amongst ourselves. We should always live life to the fullest and show our family and friends how much we love them. After all, when everything is said and done, love is the only possession that truly matters.

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I SWEAR 9/13/06

Meri
So true, so true. True love is never selfish. If you really love someone, you have to do what is best for them, even if it means hurting yourself in the process. Hugs to you, Yoda, if you have ever had to go through this, and hugs to you even if you haven't. You're a nice fellow and I'm sure you will find that special someone eventually!

Anndi
I'm always move by your thoughts and humbled by your writing.
Beautiful Dante.

Dixiechick
Beautifully written

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TOO LITTLE, TOO LATE 9/16/06

Sue
OK..that is it! Somehow, some way...YOU are watching ME and all that goes on in my life! I mean, every time you write...it is about me...or is it about Jo? No, it is definitly ME! Now, I have just been "dumped"...well kind of dumped...by someone I thought had deep feelings for me. Turns out, I am not loveable! Turns out, I am just loveable enough to be a "friend". So Yoda...I will be looking around...and soon or later I will see you...watching me...and I will...well I will....you just wait. Oh and Love those dimples!

Meri
I believe forgiveness is good, not only for the forgiven, but for the forgiver. By letting go of your anger and resentment for the other person, you can find inner peace and tranquility. Of course, sometimes, the forgiven do not appreciate the forgiveness given, in which case it is time to let them go. One can only be stepped on so many times before the realization hits that one's life is better off without the unappreciative person in it.

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HELLO 10/9/06

Meri
LOL! Well, I'm not addicted to MySpace. I don't even have an account! It's true, though, that we all, at one time or another, had or have an addiction. Some of us are willing to admit it and some of us live in total denial. I am currently addicted to Taylor Hicks and the Soul Patrol. For the longest time, I couldn't pull myself away from the AI boards. Happily, I no longer feel compelled to go and post there anymore. However, I do have a new addiction: chat! Even so, I think I'm starting to wean myself off of it...at least, to some extent. Hmmm, I wonder what will happen when Taylor's official site comes online? LOL

CoCo
Sorry, Yoda it looks like a trend. lol

Something you may not know about me...I am a musician, and I can tell you honestly from my own perspective, that it's not the roar of the crowds and the rush of the adrenaline that hooks a musician. It's the ultimate freedom of expression-the creativity of the art that speaks to our souls. It feeds off itself inside you. It nourishes you and yet creates a hunger for more.

I am a full-time teacher and full-time sing mom, but I can't go a day without playing music on one of my instruments. I am fortunate in that my job permits me to do that within the context of my work, but I also practice at home, for the sake of my son who, at 3 1/2, is showing signs of musical creativity. He, too, plays his musical instruments and sings every day.

A;though music is essentially a performance art, intended to be shared, it is as integral to the human spirit as breathing is to the human body, an intensely personal experience that should never be denied.

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BEST IS YET TO COME 10/13/06

Robin
I do not always respond, but have enjoyed all of your yodaisms I have been fortunate enough to have received. You truely have a wonderful gift, and to be able to put such insight into words, still boggles me. Will be anxiously awaiting, as I am sure, the best is yet to come!!!

Meri
"The best is yet to come." Yes, that is a good way to think, Yoda. We should always strive to improve on ourselves. It keeps us from growing complacent and letting our skills slide.
I've noticed how insightful you are, and the fact that you are exceptionally observant. It just goes to show that men and women really aren't as different as people think. It is possible for a man to think like a woman, and for a woman to think like a man. Perhaps if we were all a little more observant, and paid attention, we would all understand each other much better.

Sue
OK...geez, I admit it! I am one of the females always asking you if you are psychic....please oh please forgive me! Seriously, your posts always seem to "hit" me directly in the heart, and I always seem to be able to relate, on a personal level to your subject matter. I thank you for your writings! I have learned so much about relationships, from a Man's point of view., which has been a valuable lesson for me! The men I have date have not been good communicators. Tell a man you had a bad day at work, giving details, and the first thing he feels is "pressure" to "fix" whatever problem you had encountered. In the past I used to sit there thinking to myself...what is wrong with this insensitive jerk..he has not said one word about the problems I just told him. Now I understand, it takes a Man a while to "think", to take in all that you have said...then it takes more time for him to process what you said. That is when he begins to try to find some way to "fix" your problem. When in reality all the woman wants is someone she can vent to about the situation. If the woman is me, I am usually over whatever happened at work in 5 minutes...then I move on to another subjuect. Do mean feel useless or like a failure if he can not solve your problem? So Yoda tell me, am I right in these assumptions I have made? I have a blind date tomorrow night and I would really like some feeback from you.
Thanks,

Gail
I love your Yodaisms, and look forward to getting them weekly. And yes, you have struck a chord with me, and often times, what you say in your messages I am going through that same week. Your insight, wisdom and love are evident in each blog you write, and I am proud to have you as a link on my own blog.
Keep it up! You're a bright spot in my otherwise dingy email inbox...

Travis
Dude,
To answer your question - just about everything I've read from you has described something I've been going through. It's freaky scary sometimes. But I guess we've come through some similar experiences and learned some similar lessons from them.

CoCo
Yoda, I sure as heck haven't been reading your blog for 10 years, but I have found it to be most profound and helpful.

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CALL ME WHEN YOUR SOBER 10/16/06

Meri
LMOO!!!! You have just voiced most of the reasons I avoid getting drunk! I don't like the idea of being so uninhibited that I embarass the living daylights out of myself! I doubt I would recover fully if that happened! **shudders** It's kind of fun to watch drunk people though. You just never know what they might do! LOL

Carmen
Bravo, my friend!! Very interesting and soo true :)) I must say that i'm guilty of drunk dialing only once in my lifetime and it was a couple weekends ago...i called my friend Kristy to ask her why she wasn't downtown having fun with all of us..LoL THe next day i didn't remember making the call but was told allll about it...

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ART OF LOVE 10/19/06

Meri
Wow, that's deep. No wonder you are the Yodaguru! LOL It's true, if you're not ready for love, it can overpower you. Of course, this is true of any emotion. You have to learn to deal with them and control them so that you don't end up making a mess of your life. To be truly content, moderation in all things is key!

Coco
I'm going to come back later and see I I under this any better than the first three times I read it. Sorry-its been one of those kinds of days, Yoda.

I've read and re-read, then come back in countless times to read again, and finally I understood the message that I knew here for me. This was extraordinarily timely for me, and I thank you for it. Today, I feel shaky from the battering of emotions but I'm still standing. It's a positive thing. Now I feel the need to go blog something myself. Thanks for helping me to focus my mind, Yoda.

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THE BETTER MAN 10/23/06

Meri
I think most women would be flattered to have two men fighting over them. I mean, it's nice to feel desirable. On the other hand, if the woman has feelings for only one of them, or neither of them, she should make this known. To lead them on would be unfair. However, if she has feelings for both of them, I think she needs to consider what she really wants. If she is that conflicted, maybe neither is the right man for her. Just a thought.
I agree with you about love. When you really love somebody, you will do whatever is best for them, even if it means you get hurt in the process.

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ALL FOR LOVE 7/16/06

Michelle
That was nice Yoda Man....Some guys..relationships..some love is really not worth fighting for. That's when faith and determination need to be kicked to the curb...and all you need is the courage to get the hell away!! haha....I've never been in a love..so, what would I know. I totally agree with you on how scared someone can be when you start something with someone. You never know what's going to happen so you really don't want to put yourself out there completely...in the end, you've got to pick up your own broken heart. Have u ever had a girlfriend?

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UNCONDITIONAL 10/5/06

CoCo
Unconditional love...like that of a parent for his/her child.Like that of a dog. Like that of a friend who understands the true meaning of friendship. Can that type of love exist between man and woman?

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HERE I STAND 11/13/05

Bento
Sometimes you wanna burn that bridge, alot of times you wanna forget its there. Right now Im halfway across, and its swaying morer than the Tacoma narrows, baby!
Its funny how love creeps up on ya when your not looking. And the dern thing is still freaky and messed up. For someof us, its easy to attract, but they dont understand Love. Its lust they understand, the moment then ya move on. With love, Love is a knife dipped in alcohol and salt. It hurts like a bitch, but like the ancient incas or the cherokee, you must stand the pain as a right of passage . then, and only then will love no longer hurt. Get through the unknown, the suffering, the hurt, and you will be better for it
It sound almost morbid, but when you've experience that pain, you understand where Im coming from.
I feel everyday coming closer, connecting more and more and everyday the pain is a little less. I pray and do my part to make love work and to make the pain of love go away okay, i'm done waxing poetic, back to regular sarcastic Bento

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THAT'S JUST WRONG 10/26/06

Meri
I can honestly say that I have never taken revenge on a man for any wrong done me. One reason being that no man has ever actually wronged me; another being that I'm not a vengeful person by nature. I tend to be very forgiving. However, I can fully understand why a woman would take revenge on a man. A woman gives her love and trust to a man, then he turns around and betrays her. That can't be an easy thing to accept or forgive. Of course, betrayal is a two-way street. Women are just as capable of it as men, and men, too, can be vengeful. I can't say who's better at revenge, men or women, but I'm certainly aware of our (women's) abilities in the psychological warfare department! Heeheehee. However, I do think the punishment should fit the crime (if, indeed, punishment is necessary at all). I mean, kicking a man in the groin would be a little harsh if all he did was be late for supper!

Coco
Wow-what kind of women do you hang out with?This one just sent shudders down my spine. Every mature person MUST know that revenge has a nasty way about coming and biting you where you sit. Most of these little "revenge tactics" sound like something some of my LESS mature high school school students might try, but the more balanced ones-never! If a relationship is going that badly, it is the fault of both parties, and the situation must be resolved or dissolved asap. I sure hope men don't tar all women with this particular brush, becuase it's just as wrong as it would be for me to believe that all men are like my ex-dh.

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HEADS OR TAILS 10/29/06

Meri
Ah yes! Choices. We all have to make them. Whether small ones (like deciding what to eat) or big ones (like deciding what we're gonna do with our lives) they are still choices we have to make. Whenever I have to make one, I prefer to think things through, consider all the pros and cons beforehand. Sometimes I make the right choice, sometimes the wrong one. Either way, there is always the "road not taken," the other option that might have worked out better. Of course, you can't go back, so, inevitably, you cannot know for sure. Ah well, it's better to keep going forward and not dwell too much on the past. The only thing you can do is to continue making choices and hope for the best!

CoCo
Sometimes I wish it was that easy, Yoda. Then again, I might not always be happy with my choices in life, but at least they were my choices to make(or my mistakes...lol).

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YOU ARE SO BEAUTIFUL 11/1/06

Meri
I, personally, don't mind being called cute. However, I can understand why some women might not like it. Oftentimes, the word "cute" is used whenever someone wants to be polite. For instance, you might use it of someone you're not particularly attracted to, but don't want to be mean (as in "you're cute and all, but..."). Anyway, your physical self is only a part of who you are, and not the most important part either! While the physical attractiveness might draw two people together, it's the mental and emotional commonalities that keep them together. By the way, "You are so beautiful" is an awesome song!

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A REAL GOOD MAN 11/3/06

Sandra
This goes both ways. Men only want what they can’t have. This “good” man you describe might be surprised that there is “good” woman waiting in the wings for him as soon as he stops pining for the shallow, insipid woman that doesn’t even see him. Here’s some food for thought, I see more beautiful women with average looking men than I see beautiful men with average looking women. I myself am grateful I have found one of the good men. Good luck in your quest dude. P.S. Stare away, I’m used to it by now :P

Meri
Hmmm, you sound a little bitter tonight, my friend. However, I would like to say that not all of us women are as shallow as all that. Not all of us go for the Brad Pitts and Matthew McCanaugheys of the world. Some of us do look at the "inner man" and like those men who are kind, attentive, intelligent and mannerly. Unfortunately, we live in a world where we're often taught, through the media, to look mainly at the outward appearance of a person. Women AND men can be blinded by all the Beautiful People out there. Even those of us who are not usually shallow can end up judging a book by its cover. It's not right, but that's the way it works. I'm sorry, Yoda, that you've had to endure shallowness from some of my fellow-women. However, just remember that there are "deep" women out there who are looking for deep men. You just have to be patient about finding them and helping them, if they are temporarily sidetracked by the Beautiful People. If they are really deep, they'll come around. Hugs!

Gina
Yoda...Sarcastic or not, I do believe that many women (and men) look for that sexy person who makes their heart race and they overlook the person who is right under their very nose who would be a wonderful life partner for them. Thankfully, at the ripe old age of 21 I realized what my mother told me was true...the excitement of finding that animal magnetism doesn't last, but when you find the contentment and respect and the love of a gentle and caring soul, you've hit the jackpot and here I am almost 21 years later...content and more deeply in love every day of my life with my precious husband. Don't apologize for what you wrote, it's true to a certain extent...I have friends who say they wish they could find what I have and they could, but they are looking in all of the wrong places and relying on the excitement of the short-term. Love, Light & Peace,

Liz
Yoda, will you marry me!!
LOL! But on a serious note. I've been married twice and. What you say is a nice sentament, but it is inaccurate.I still think you rock though!

Julie
I had to respond to this article because my daughter (19 yrs.) just broke up with her BF of 4 years so she could date some "idiots" and thus learn to appreciate her first love. He will wait for her..at least he said he would wait. My heart breaks for her and I just wish they would get back together. Every mom's dream for her baby girl is to never have her heart broken...to never experience pain that was felt by herself. My email to the both of them went like this: "My prayer is that both of you will find comfort in whatever choices you make." I can't do anymore except to pray....right? Take care dear.

Michelle
Well Yoda. Well, Well Well...not everyone goes for looks. Like for instance. The Krispy Kreme Boy....I met him @ a bar in Waikiki in May and there weren't too many lookers there. But, I felt he'd do for the night....I didn't think he was UGLY...but he certainly wasnt my type and nearly 6 months later he has me bawling my eyes out on Halloween night in the same city where I met him. He nearly ruined what was supposed to be a fun and relaxing vacation. :) I've met plenty of attractive men in Hawaii....but my stupid little heart was pretty much only open to Kaci. ( the ugliness in the pic with me and my sister). OK, I'm just being mean because I'm mad. It's true. It's true what you say. We like the bad ones...the ones that don't treat us well at all. It's something about that chase, u know. For the guys that run from us and don't call us back...or hardly pay attention to us. They make us question our beauty, our personality, our everything. Then there we are....running after them. The good ones.......we let them get away...Hmm....maybe i just have a lot of issues. haha...

Dix
I swear if I wasnt married, I'd snap you up and take you away into the sunset. You are awesome Yoda dear. And also a hottie, whether ya know it or not.

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THE STORY OF MY LIFE 11/8/06

Meri
I seriously doubt anyone would want to follow me around with a video camera, and I definitely know my life would not make for much interesting viewing (although there are moments during the day when I do things, or things happen to me, that could be construed as humourous, I suppose. LOL).
You are right, though, that we are all stars of our own reality show. Whatever we do, we are right there, at centre stage. We do not just sit to the side and merely watch the reality show of our lives; we live it! How we live it is entirely up to ourselves. We can either choose to live a life that others are envious of, or just spend our time going through the motions, not really doing much more than survive. Every day is precious, and we should always strive to live each one in the most interesting and enjoyable way that we can.

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BEHIND THE MASK 1/16/07

Meri
It can be a scary thing to show somebody your true self, to stand totally naked (as it were) in front of the one you love, totally vulnerable, and trust that they will accept you for who you are, no matter what. Nobody likes to risk being ridiculed or rejected. Of course, the bond that can be forged after such a disclosure is often stronger than steel. Definitely food for thought

CoCo
When I was a kid, one of my favorite places was the library. I realized as I was reading tonight, that your blog gives me that same feeling. Weird huh? Whenever I need a voice of sanity, a calming effect, or a place to be quiet and think, I know I can come in here. Although I'm not even attempting a relationship right now, much of what you said here was on the mark for me. I have a lot of repairs to make, I'm afraid, as the past year has been mined with one mishap after another. First, I'm going to work on that deep-seated instinct to run and hid when things get rough...sorry-probably tmi for a blog comment, but it got me think...

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CoCo

IN YOUR EYES 12/3/06


Hey Yoda-sorry I haven't been in lately. I would I could agree with what you're saying about here, but it's rather one-dimensional. See, I know that love shines out of my eyes, but it's love for my son, and not for the Godforsaken pic that I was once chained to. Nor any other man. Maybe not ever again. Because you can only be hurt so much before that part of you dies. And I'm not sure it will ever regenerate itself in my heart. Sorry. Hope things work out for your, dear.

INSIDE OUT 11/26/06

I loved this post, Oh Great one. It really makes on think. I know that mentally I don't consider physical beauty to be important, but do I always follow what my mind tells me? Probably not. As a society, we are conditioned to value a person's appearance way too much. I'm sure that subconsciously I am guilty of judging based on looks, at least until I get to know the person behind the face. Gonna dwell on this for a while, and maybe come back for a second crack at it.

ALL ABOARD 11/15/06

Woooo, Yoda! Memories are one of the good things about life, darlin'. Even the bad ones become bittersweet, and a learning experience, as time passes. Personally, I see nothing wrong with cartoons, either. I watch them on Saturday morning with my son, and sometimes I think I enjoy them more than he does.

Hugs,
Bugs Bunny Addict

WHENEVER YOU COME AROUND 11/13/06
Anonymous
Amen to that. It's so hard to say it for the first time. Maybe it's the fear of being rejected??

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WE RIDE 1/19/07

Travis
Nice. This came at the perfect time for me and describes where my lady and I are perfectly. Thanks
Things are going very well. We're taking big steps forward and no steps backward. I'm happy.

Meri
You know, this is so true. I was reading in the paper today about a couple who had just celebrated their 60th wedding anniversary, and they said that the key to maintaining a relationship is being able to let go of your anger. They said, basically what you said, that you had to be able to work through things and make compromises. Their relationship had been through its share of ups and downs, but they worked through them and are just as much in love as they were when they first got married. Everybody should be so fortunate!

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BOW DOWN 1/28/07

Robin
*Stands and claps wildly!!! Hey girls, Look......a guy who finaly gets it!! hehe

CoCo
Dante, you know I thoroughly enjoy your musings and find much to ponder within their messages. Well, hon. I think I laughed more while reading this one than I have in a while. Your dry wit here really kicks it. You know I'm not leaving it at that, though. I never do. No matter how much I'd like to agree with you on all counts (I do agree with most, btw), I think you left out one important point. Neither is as strong standing alone as with a partner by their side. There are times when we need someone to lean on, someone who is more than a friend. Most of us have experienced that peculiar sense of nirvana that comes from being able to unload the burden, even if only for a few minutes, and to lean into the comforting embrace of someone you trust completely. It can be a parent, a sibling, a lover, a spouse or an unconditional friend. True joy in a relationship comes when you are able to share the bad along with the good. I could never have written this a few months ago. Today, it seems so obvious. Thank you, my friend, for giving me so much food for thought.

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MAKE THE GRADE 5/19/07

Meri
Ah, Yoda, you are wise beyond your years! Yes, us women can be difficult to understand...sometimes we don't even understand ourselves...but if you want a happy, healthy relationship with us, you have to keep trying. After all, anything worth having is worth fighting for!

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PROVE ME WRONG(Chris Benoit Murder/Suicide)6/26/07

Angell
*standing ovation*
Yoda my friend - one of your best. After all the crap I've been reading on the net and hearing on the radio, it seems most people forget what he brought to the ring and would rather concentrate on his last actions.I for one will miss his presence greatly, and am mouring the passing of a Canadian icon in the business. He truly was a legend.

Ann
I think it's even sadder when it's at their own will... far more tragic. No one was able to reach him and make a difference. It takes a great deal of despair to push someone to think the best option is taking their own life. To me, he was a great wrestler, a Montrealer, a human being.**Hugs to my fellow wrestling fans**

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THE TRUTH IS OUT THERE 7/8/07

Meri
I really enjoyed watching the X-files when it was on, seeing as how I'm a bit of a sci-fi/fantasy geek! I'm somewhat skeptical about conspiracy theories, although I like to keep an open mind, (but not so open my brain falls out!). I don't believe the moon landing was faked, or that aliens landed at Roswell, but I don't discount the idea that conspiracies do exist. After all, there are lots of things governments and other organizations don't tell us (I tend to take what pharmaceutical companies tell us with a grain of salt cuz it's quite likely that they would want to stack the deck in their own favour), so it's possible that there is a conspiracy out there to keep us in the dark about certain things. Anyway, when it comes to matters of the heart, I tend to keep up my guard. I'm what you might call an optimistic-realist. While I like to think there is someone in the world for me, I know there is a lot of pain and heartbreak in the world too. Therefore, I try not to let myself get too vulnerable. The truth may be out there, but there's no sense in going after it unprepared.

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JUST AS I AM 8/1/07

Meri
Funny how you should write that now...while I was thinking about crushes and how we often put those on whom we have a crush on a pedestal. We tend to think they are perfect when, in actuality, they are flawed, imperfect human beings like the rest of us. Yes, true love really is about accepting people as they are and not as you imagine them to be.

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NO FEAR 8/14/07

Pixie
I had just been having a conversation with a male friend of mine on this very subject right before your email came through. They say timing is everything! I hope you don’t mind, but I shared this with my friends on my MySpace, with credit to you of course and a link to your site. I found this to touch me the most out of all your writings.

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LIVE FREE 9/11/07

Dante,
Thank you for sharing your thoughts on this day. I've found that people who weren't born in a country like yours or mine seem to appreciate the freedoms and quality of life with greater reverence than so very many who take it for granted, my grandparents were like that.
From this tragedy, a renewed appreciation was born in many people. Was the price too high to pay, lives of innocents, heroes fallen? That is for each person to reflect on, but we owe it to them to remember and live our lives to the fullest.
Dixie

As usual, Yodaman, your thoughts humble me. I have been sitting watching the coverage of 9/11 today, and also watching the footage of Bin Laden. It saddens me to think that he's still alive and has gotten away scot free with the attacks. I work for a charitable organization and in the week of 9/11 six years ago I decorated a window of our store with patriotic things. I put up a white Christmas tree with red, white, and blue lights, and ornaments. We all vowed that as long as Bin Laden was alive, the window would stay patriotic and in memory of all who lost their lives on 9/11. It has also become a memorial to soldiers who have lost their lives in the war on terror. It gets aggravating to refresh it every so often and come up with new ideas, but I feel that people need to remember what happened and be thankful for our freedom. I could ramble on this subject for hours, but I just wanted to let you know I appreciate your commentary, as I do all of them. I don't have much time to respond to them all, but I had to respond to this one.
Thanks for all of your thoughts. I enjoy reading them. Hope you are doing well.
God Bless,
Tracey

Anonymous
In our household we have a collection of hunting shotguns and rifles. I was born and raised in the South, so to me, not owning any kind of hunting gun is kind of weird. I personally have only shot a Colt Revolver 35 once and hunting rifle with a scope once so I am not gun savvy at all. But if needed to I would use them to defend my property, dogs or our lives. We had to take out our shot gun and place it by the door when the three 'Canes hit Central Florida in 2005 due to the looters when there was no power in any of the neighborhoods for weeks at a time.
Only in America can you voice your opinion against government and not be picked up by secret police. You most certainly will be placed on a "watch list" if your verbal or written tirade seems outside the "norm" and poses a threat to a government installation or organization. Which I think is a good thing as long as it is not taken out of context. I am a liberal and I like to watch Michael's Moore's documentaries/movies. I don't agree with him about everything that he portrays in his documentarires/movies but he does make you think outside the "box" at times. So does Rush Limbaugh which I used to watch occasionally.

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CAN WE TALK 11/14/07

Meri
Smart Yoda is! Are you sure you're not a woman? LOL :P

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EVERY LITTLE THING 1/28/08

Ashley
I must be honest. I haven't read anything in the past year. For some reason, something within me told me to read this one. Thank you. It was as if God was speaking to me to just read this and wait a little longer. It's funny because earlier I was trying to find a song on myspace and I love Dishwalla and was on there page and was going add to "Every Little Thing", but I passed. Now I know it's the perfect song. Thank you again for the inspiration since it's matching my situation perfectly now.

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NEVER GONE 3/19/08

Becky
Interesting to think about traditions. Nice post. However, the problem with some traditions is that they are done blindly without thinking about where they come from or what the greater significance dating back decades or centuries means. Your example of asking a "father figure" for permission to marry a daughter is a good example. My boyfriend asking anyone other than me for permission to marry me would not go well. The days when fathers could grant permission for a man to marry his daughter without her consent or when the daughter was a dependent in the family and someone for whom responsibility had to be handed off (with some money in the form of a dowry for the burden) are gone. A woman is responsible enough to make her own choices in marriage. I don't begrudge you your desire to ask the father for permission at all. I'm just putting this point out there so that you know you might want to think carefully about following this tradition without knowing her thoughts on the matter. Although by the time you get to proposal stage you'll probably have a good idea.

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FIND THE JOY5/28/08

Thorofasius
I agree! A very inspiring post, thank you!

Anonymous
This post was truly inspiring. You've opening my eyes about many things. You sire are a true Philosopher and for that I thank you. I hope that my life can bring joy to others and hopefully I have done so already. Thank you again.

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FOREVER YOUNG 4/8/08

Chris
I read your article titled "Find The Joy" and now this article.
I have to say that you are a wise beyound your age and have hit may very salient points about love and relationships, be they platonic or intimate.
I came across your page when I googled the old Egyptian "have you found joy in your life-has your life brought joy to others' line from the move "The Bucket List".
I agree with you that a relationship is like the 4 seasons and we all strive for a long pleasant summer of warmth and a ever blossoming garden but with it comes the sweat and the constant weeding and fertilizing, with out which a relationship would not work. Then comes the autumn of our old age where we enjoy the colors of our love and finally the winter of our loss as we move to another world one at a time.
Thank you for your wise words.

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MY GENERATION 6/15/08

Meri
Yup, yup, yup. We're from the same generation, no doubt about it! Kids these days get away with too much, are spoiled rotten and have no regard for their elders. Mind you, I'm not talking about ALL kids, but a large percentage are that way. It's like the parents are too afraid of getting into trouble with the law or hurting their childrens' feelings if they assert their right as parents to discipline their offspring. As a child, I was never one for getting into trouble and causing mischief anyway, but I knew better than to cross my parents. All it took was The Look and a certain tone of voice to make me realize that I better do as I was told or I was in for trouble! I may not have kids, and may not want any of my own, but I have trained puppies. If you let a puppy get its own way, it will walk all over you and be a danger to itself and society when it gets bigger. Kids are the same way. You just have to know when to say no and mean it.

Pixie
Yoda, it’s amazing how different things are these days and part of it can be chalked up to laws. Back when we were little, if your parent didn’t give you a spanking for misbehaving and let you get away with things you were a bad parent. Now, well you can get fined, or worse, have your child taken away (dependant on the state) for hitting your child. Doesn’t matter if they deserve a hard smack on the butt, the parent can’t do it. I know that I’ve tried the “time out” and the “reverse psychology” and it works like crap but when I raise my voice and threaten a smack on the butt it works. It’s crap when parent has to be afraid to enforce positive behavior because of the possible negative consequences to themselves.

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WHAT'S THE POINT 9/19/08

Karen
yeah! whats the point? the point is, it is almost always this case, you love someone yet that someone doenst love you as much you love him/her; or its this, you are being loved by someone soo much but you just dont feel the love for him/her....then the question-for people like you and me who are on this thirtyish already, who are single and unattached, what is there with relationships that make us write these kind of blogs???? i know the answer----- NOT LOVE but HOPE that someday, that person we picture in our minds would be there beside us when we sleep and wake up....

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JUST MY TYPE 2/20/09

Karen
that second paragraph there is so true.. there came a time that i was sooo down crying out loud in my room cause the memories of pain and deceit came to my mind that time, and it feels like it jsut happened yesterday. when i thought i already found the "right guy", and he caused me soo much pain, i just told myself," where have i done wrong?"..when all things i thought are so good and smooth, swoosh....the heartbreak....waiting on His will can be tough at times. but i guess, its just the best thing to do...

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FINALLY 2/7/09

Karen
there can never be a greater gift than to have that someone with you (for the rest of your life) that would just be there for you wherever whatever and whichever life will lead you to...sometimes i would just sigh and tell myself my time will come and i can ask that someone-where were you all along? i have been waiting for you..and he would answer, i was just here. now lets start our life together and face today tomorrow and the next todays and tomorrows together......

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JUST SAY NO 4/18/09

Coco
*picks myself up off the floor from the laughing fit this essay brought on* ohhhhh myyyyyy dear Yoda ... this one takes the cake! As a teacher of your so-called 'saggers", I've had many opportunities to say to an unsuspecting teenage boy, "Pull up your pants, Steven (just a random name ... NOT!), or you'll be in danger of having me know more about you than is appropriate!" It usually embarrasses them enough that I don't have to deal with the problem again for weeks. LOL


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LIVE AND LEARN 6/14/09

Shelly
Amen Dante....the older I get, the more I realize just how much and how many things I screwed up...BUT, it is the gift of learning from those errors that make some old people so incredibly AWESOME!!!!! If we could only be born with that innate wisdom already built in, think of how many children could be spared so many heartaches and tears...adults too. But my final theory on that is simple...no rain, no rainbows...love ya

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FACE IN THE CROWD5/4/09

Ann
Sometimes it takes a while to see that special person because we're being distracted by something shiny... but in the end, that shine tarnishes when it's not true and we are once again free to truly look with our heart's eyes. That is when we see... not because the other person has done something or stood out, but because we are open to what our heart searches for: that kindred soul that makes us complete.

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HOPE FLOATS 9/21/09

Mary Ann
Hey it's me Marry Ann, Facebook girl who asked about your quote the other day)&how I could shake my sister&her meanness). I forgot that I had been following your blog, mostly because I wasn't blogging myself....but I realize in every picture you've got the "peace" sign up...is that a trademark? Just curious! Loved your blog on Hope Floats, will to reread again when I'm not so brain dead!

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MORE THAN A FRIEND 11/3/09

Anonymous
It is insanely hard to keep the emotions you build in check in a guy/girl friendship. I have been in love with my Best friend(who is a guy) for the better half of a year. I am there for him consistantly. Whilst he is there for me when I need him too.

I have not been in a romantic relationship in a little over a year. While he was in a one for a couple months early on in the year. I went through the whole "I can't hang out with you cause I have a gf and you're a girl" thing. But I was there whenever he called. But on my end. I was left alone. which f'n hurt! But needless to say, as soon as they broke up..who got a phone call? yep. me.

It's so difficult cause I want to be a good friend. But I do not want a relationship a relationship with this person either. I don't want to lose the friendship aspect of our relationship, which sadly, in most relationship, tend to desintergrate after a while.

so often relationships build a comfort where people actually stop caring about the other perosns feelings. Friends continue to care for their friends feelings and needs, while unfortunately partners stop caring assuming the other's just going to with it because they are comfortable inside the relationship. the fear of being left is gone along with the respect and consideration most people only give to friends.

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NOTHING BUT NET 7/3/09

Rose
Dante your writings are beautiful. Every time i read them it puts a smile on my face because you really put your heart out on your writings. It just truly tells me alot about you. What i like the most is that your not afraid to express your thoughts and feelings which basically makes your work so great! I honestly think you should write a book because you truly have talent Dante. If you sold books i would buy every single one of them, thats how much i love reading your work through out the years It just captures me. It's crazy because when i start reading i picture myself being in that moment. I really loved that one you wrote about the 80's...everything you mentioned in there was just amazing beacause it brought back so much childhood memories for me...it was nice. Keep up the writing because im a big fan

You know Dante your words are so wise, deep, and very touching..About the love part it's so true..about a man and a woman..and your writings i could really relate 2. It's so crazy because i've experienced alot of things you wrote..I didnt realize how thoughtful you were..your so quite in person..yet you have alot inside your heart and mind..your a beautiful person inside out Dante just wanted 2 let u know that..we need more people like u in this world..opened minded, caring, and so kind..maybe the world would revolve a little better you know. Again your blogs really touched the heart..keep writing it's very interesting to read!

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I PROMISE 7/10/10

Anndi
Sometimes promises are broken because of circumstances that aren't under our control. But when it happens, it's a sign that life is taking you on a different path.

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MY MARK(600TH YODAISM))8/8/10

Anonymous
Wow...600 eh? Congrats to you sir!

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WHAT WOMEN WANT12/31/11

Lora
Beautifully said and well thought :)

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Ronnie Kirchner

MORE THAN ENOUGH 4/21/12

You hit the nail on the head once again Yoda. As I have a fairly young daughter, I pray and work hard to instill a foundation of love. A foundation that, at least I believe will enabler her to have a strong heart, mind & a natural self worth. This little block of time & comment can not even touch the surface of kids group in "2012". Thing change quickly & will continue to do so, but one this is for sure. Its tough growing up with these external peer pressures, norms and indirect expectations. Correlating not only on dress and behaviors but even love&self worth. What am I trying to get at? Well if I shall conclude, I, ladies continue to be strong. Your will&heart can be the strongest forces on the earth!

PARTY ON 2/24/12

Such truth! Celebration is when "you cross things off your bucket list." I resonate completely with you. this! Also your right, what better way to accomplish goals then with a friend in tow? As you said it. Two is better then one and collaborative efforts can be more fruitful in a large amount of capacities.

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A NEW CHAPTER 12/31/12

Jena Mae Nacar
This is bulls-eye..:) Hit me through and through..:) thanks for the article brother! :)

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HAVEN'T MET YOU YET 9/29/12

Anonymous
I met my husband by doing something I was not suppose to I took a chance snuck out when I was 16 met him at waffle house. He is everything I've been looking for and everything I need. I feel if I hadn't of done it at that time I might be years before I would have met him again. We have been together 6 years strong married 2 in december and I wouldn't have it any other way. I love your post its so true.

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THAT'S FUNNY 3/20/13

Rachel J.
Hahahaha! That's absolutely true!! So glad that you've observed that, he never laughs! Lol (and my ticking bomb will go off one day....just wait lol) love u! Rachel "Blondie"

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THE BRIGHT SIDE 3/18/13

Heather Bright
Thank you so much!!! That really made my day and quite frankly one of the nicest things I've ever read!!!!.

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UNLEASHED 3/4/13

Alyssa H.
I am absolutely speechless...

When joining this industry a little over a year ago I had NEVER planned on a listener writing an entire blog on me and having so many amazing things to say. I share my life with ALL of you and I am def feeling the impact. Dante Abundo, you are amazing. THANK you for making my night/week/month/YEAR!

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THE CREW 2/27/13

Alyssa H.
LOVE this!!!!! Much better than my speech this morning LOL

Matt M.
I know I'm probably NOT supposed to like this, but that was so well written Dante, and I was a part of the Morning Guys for so long, I have to. When I teach my class at South that's one of the things I preach, radio is personal, and should be personal, because people can get music anywhere now, there has to be something more. That's why I still do it, the listeners, and as long as I'm able, I always will. Ya know Dante, there are still times when I wake up at 3:30 AM in a cold sweat thinking I'm late for work! Had fun with the crew last Friday night at the Wharf too. As you said, even though I was odd man out, there is still a bond there that goes deeper than what's on the surface.

Heather B.
This is BEAUTIFUL!!!! We will meet soon I'm sure! Thank you so much for waking up with us in the morning!

Scotty
This is awesomeness.


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