No Fear

Leo Buscaglia once said, ~When love is accompanied with deep intimacy, it raises us to the highest level of human experience. In this exalted space, we can surrender our egos, become vulnerable and know levels of joy and well-being unique among life experiences. We attain a glimpse of the rapture that can be ours. Boundaries are blurred, there are no limitations and we rejoice in union. We become one, and at the same time, both.~ When it comes to love or true love for that matter the physical aspect of love plays a significant role in the relationship, but it doesn't necessarily mean it's the most important. Essentially, one of the things that builds a strong bond between men and women is being able to be intimate with each other as you share in three ways: personally, mentally, and emotionally.

If you think about it, one of the ways to establish an intimate relationship with someone special is getting to know the person on a more personal level, which is something that is sometimes very difficult to do. Why? You see, every person has a comfort zone that feels safe to be in causing each of us to distance ourselves from getting too close and if we decide to step outside our comfort zone it can be a scary situation indeed as there is a risk of revealing certain things we worked so hard to keep hidden. However, it's a risk that may very well pay off as you gradually are comfortable within your own skin to talk about things from your most embarrassing moments growing up as a kid to unfortunate past heartbreaks and you have let it happen on its own instead of having it forced out of you.

Without a doubt, sharing your innermost thoughts with someone you love is an aspect of intimacy that can bring two people closer. For it one's own thoughts in which there are hidden answers and its the job, so to speak, of a potential and/or significant other to ask the so-called hard hitting questions. Questions such as: Do you believe you can be faithful to one person for the rest of your life? Can you provide absolute stability in the relationship when the foundation is shaken? What scares you the most? You see, it's those questions and others like it that can most definitely free not only your doubt filled mind, but also the doubt filled mind of the one you love as certain mental barriers are able to be broken through causing both of you to feel a sense of peace, whereby making an even deeper connection.

Let me ask you this question, do you think our own emotions or lack thereof can be the very thing that inhibits us to experience intimacy in a long term relationship? I believe so and as a guy it's hard to verbally put into words our feelings and when we try we end up humiliating ourselves. Oftentimes, it's hard to know exactly what we're feeling whereas for women its easy and it can bring us to a point of frustration where we simply lash out by saying something totally harsh. For some, most, or all women they have experienced the brunt of the verbal assaults leaving them in tears, but what makes it a considerably intimate situation is they choose to not run away, as well as, not give up on a guy who she knows has the capacity to show there is a softer side behind the tough exterior and vice versa.

Amy Bloom said, ~Intimacy is being seen and known as the person you truly are.~ In retrospect, love without intimacy is hollow and no matter how much you want someone to love you first have to find the love within yourself otherwise it's meaningless. There comes a point where you have to go far beyond your boundaries and explore further within yourself than you ever thought possible. Not only that, you have to break your limitations and confront the personal, mental, as well as, emotional pain that you endured in the past to reach the level of intimacy you want to attain, which can be absolutely scary. Ultimately, you have to be committed to see it through all the way, expect to fail at times, not make any excuses when things don't go right, and in the end have no fear.