Friday, February 09, 2018

Chaos Heart Theory

Jonathan Carroll once said, ~Real love is always chaotic. You lose control; you lose perspective. You lose the ability to protect yourself. The greater the love, the greater the chaos.~ Let me ask you this question in regards to matters of the heart, do you think there are seemingly random events that will unknowingly lead you to that certain someone in a serendipitous sort of way? For it's a thought provoking situation indeed as the chaos of bad past relationships are ultimately a much larger interwoven scheme that my be utterly confusing and frustrating at first; but they eventually become considerably clearer once you finally see what or should I say who is standing in front of you.

Without a doubt, there is potentially an inherent unpredictability involving love/true as it pertains to a certain guy/girl who is considered to be the proverbial chaos who may or may not be known or vice versa. Thinking about it further, its the chaos of the absolute unknown where it feels as if there is a tornado of thoughts, feelings, and/or emotions creating havoc internally so much so, it gets uncontrollable to where it sweeps you up and swallows you whole, in a manner of speaking. However, its that same chaotic individual who also has the innate ability to be the quintessential calming peace to the personal, mental, and emotional pandemonium you've been experiencing for quite some time.

As said before, there is potentially an inherent unpredictability involving love/true as it pertains to a certain guy/girl who is considered to be the proverbial chaos who may or may not be known. Of course, there is a tremendous amount of risk involved when meeting someone you're truly interested in/drawn to and for the most part you want to instinctively put all your effort in words, as well as your actions into something positive in hopes the odds turns out positive in your favor. Unfortunately, that's not always the case as a person will in all intense and purpose never be seen again after being swept up in the chaotic tornado of their thoughts, feelings, and/or emotions whereby having no way of finding a way out it.

If you think about it, the chaotic tornado representing true happiness has the capacity to provide a sense of strength you can undeniably hold on to and all you have to is let go. True, there may be unrelenting fear, anxiety, doubt, disappointment etc. of letting go and allowing yourself to become vulnerable in being swept up in the emotional/mental vortex not knowing somewhere within the swirling chaos someone's hand is positively reaching out for you to take it. Essentially, its a hand that represents and signifies trust, faith, honesty, hope, respect, patience, safety, understanding, commitment, communication, stability, etc. So, the question remains will you reach out and take it?

In retrospect, the chaotic tornado that is potentially a strong, worthwhile relationship is like trying to solve an extremely long and difficult equation. Granted, it may work out for the best or you end up going to the metaphorical drawing board of the heart. In any case, despite the simplistic nature of it all you don't want to have that utterly complex chaos rule over you. What it primarily comes down to is being able to some way have control of the chaos and know where it's taking you. In the end, the equation otherwise known as the chaos heart theory is continuously being worked on for those living the single life like myself and hopefully each of us will be able to solve it someday.

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