Wednesday, September 28, 2016

On My Way

Karen Salmansohn once said, ~Do not go speeding into love. Get to know who someone is, so you don't fall in love with the idea of them but the actual them. Don't confuse romance for intimacy. Romance attracts you speedily and physically. But intimacy is what connects you heart to heart, over time.~ In some aspect, when it comes to love/true love it can seem as if we're all wanting or should I say speeding towards, so to speak, a designated location within our own heart only to get pulled over. Unfortunately, each one of us can find or has found one's self being caught in the proverbial single life speed trap and ticketed for an infraction or a number of infractions in regards to the dating/potential/significant relationship scene. Essentially, you can either talk your way out of it and avoid paying the so called fine or completely accept the consequences to where it's another added life experience.

As I said before, it can seem as if we're all wanting or should I say speeding towards, so to speak, a designated location within our own heart only to get pulled over. Thinking about it further, a person can most definitely be eager in wanting to be in an established worthwhile relationship with a guy/girl who one will gladly go well past the speed limit for, in a manner speaking. For it's an adrenaline rush of a situation indeed as one floors it personally, mentally, emotionally, and maybe even physically pertaining to a certain someone of interest. In other words, making up for lost time after being constantly stopped and passed by other "motorists" who are now riding in the fast lane together with their forever best friend riding shotgun causing one to experience a mixture of emotions such as frustration, anger, and not to mention impatience.

Without a doubt, living the single life mistakes can certainly be made like being too eager/impatient in wanting to speed through obstacles hindering you on the road towards true happiness. True, its annoyingly irritating and oftentimes an embarrassing state of affairs finding ourselves suddenly noticing the all too familiar flashing lights of dread in our heart's internal rear view mirror. Of course, this leads to our thoughts, feelings, and/or emotions to be in all intense and purposes cited for being reckless knowing full well mistakes were made but drove faster despite of it. Heartbreak, frustration, anger, sadness, disappointment, resentment, utter contempt, fear, bitterness, etc. are a representation of individual citations being given on one's speeding ticket of the heart whereby giving the possibility of 2 harsh realities: 1.) you're never going to make it. 2.) you're late getting there and just missed him/her.

Let me ask this question to those who are presently driving on you're own metaphorical road in hopes of getting where you want to be within your own heart, how fast are you going? I think it's safe to say that for most of us we're on the highways/byways otherwise known as the single life simply cruising along and having fun jamming to CD's or the radio. However, for others they're fast and furiously speeding past us like a bat out of hell in order to catch up to the one that is seemingly father away each time he/she thinks they're getting closer. Let me tell you something, when you're too focused trying to reach as fast as humanly possible in what you've wanted for your own heart you end up on the side of road getting ticketed and missing out on the opportunity in noticing your scenic surroundings with hopefully your best buds/gal pals along for the ride as well.

Someone said, ~We all drive at the same speed. Just not necessarily at the same time or on the same road. Although, we are all heading in the same direction and towards the same destination.~ In retrospect, the directions to the ultimate destination that is matters of the heart can be an utterly confusing road to navigate at times. You see, it's best to calm down and not worry/panic about getting there because its absolutely futile. Hey, take that opportunity for however long it will be to get lost in order to find yourself and enjoy having fun seeing where the road leads you. He/she will be there waiting to pull you over so don't be in too big of a rush. In the end, for me personally I'm 99.9% sure there is someone waiting to finally pull me over who I'm unknowingly driving towards within the designated posted speed limit plus 10 over and all I can say to her, whoever she may be, is even though it's taking longer than anticipated I'm on my way.

Tuesday, September 13, 2016

Right Kind of Wrong

Carl Hiaasen once said, ~Sometimes you're going to be faced with situations where the line isn't clear between what's right and what's wrong. Your heart will tell you to do one thing and your brain will tell you to do something different. In the end, all that's left is to look at both sides and go with your best judgment.~ If you think about it, figuring out right from wrong is part of life, especially if it pertains to matters of the heart regarding one's own thoughts, feelings, and/or emotions. For it's a tough and not to mention complicated situation indeed knowing its possibly the right decision to make but at the same time struggling within yourself to the point where the following question is asked: Is it right or wrong?

Is it right or wrong to not immediately act on one's instinctive impulse to move towards the possibility of a potentially worthwhile relationship even if it's someone who is considered to be everything you've ever imagined and then some. Thinking about it further, it's totally understandable in holding back in every sense of the word of what you want to say or do involving a certain someone of interest because of past experience teaching you to become considerably cautious when it comes to one's own heart. True, as much as you want to be in a relationship you don't want to mistakenly be in one out of feeling lonely and/or witnessing those around you finding absolute true happiness whereby that sense of hope/faith is lost.

Is it right or wrong to compartmentalize your thoughts, feelings, and/or emotions when attempting to figure out whether or not the guy/girl in question you're interested in is someone you want to get to know on a more personal basis? Without a doubt, there is a big difference between a crush and genuinely liking someone to where being able to leave out emotions altogether gives an individual the opportunity to mentally investigate within yourself of one's own intentions are truly real. In other words, think it through logically with your head instead of your heart. Granted, it's not necessarily a proven method and trust me when I say the questions aren't always answered causing one to be pushed to the brink of insanity.

Let me ask you this question to those who are experiencing a quintessential balance of sorts, is it right or wrong weighing the pros and cons when dealing/facing a dilemma of heart? I think its safe to say we've all been through or are currently going through right now weighing, in a manner of speaking, our thoughts, feelings, and/or emotions so much so the tipping point can go either way. Of course, when I say tipping point I'm referring to that one aspect/thing about him/her that would in all intense and purposes overwhelmingly tip the scales in a positive rather than a negative way. Let me tell you something, be prepared to have a continuous even balance at times causing tremendous difficulty telling/revealing to you love/true love.

In retrospect, the single life is like one big scale for individuals such as myself with our own heart placed in the middle as the proverbial arrow pointing towards a happy ending while the other points to constant wonder. Oftentimes, we think we know what's right for us but end up finding ourselves at the wrong end of utter heartbreak. What it primarily comes down to is taking your time and having the patience in knowing when the right moment presents itself whenever that will be regardless if it's right or wrong. In the end, each one of us want someone who is right for us who may be weirdly odd but compliments you in such a way that those are around you say in an amusingly surprised way the both of you are the right kind of wrong for each other.

Sunday, September 04, 2016


Socrates once said, ~The secret of change is to focus all your energy, not on fighting the old, but on building the new.~ Without a doubt, staying focused after making an important change in life can most definitely bring new found focus in a very positive way. For it's a sobering situation indeed when an individual able to most past a blurred past and be given a whole new perspective with absolutely fresh eyes. Its those aforementioned fresh eyes in which you're able to truly see or should I say focus on people, places, and/or things than can be taken for granted after focusing on particular vices of the addictive nature. Essentially, by putting one's focus on other positive alternatives the future looks increasingly brighter each day.

If you think about it, being able to focus on your family can in a sense be the best medicine in rejuvenating one's zest for life. I think it's safe to say when you're a member of a family such as an uncle you're job description is to basically be fun loving, goofy, and crazy when playfully interacting with one's own nephews and/or nieces. For the most part, its the standard prerequisite for being the quintessential family member who is all about having fun. True, the tremendous joy they bring to your life gives you the neverending rather than the temporary buzz you experienced in the past; but the big difference is you will certainly remember those precious/special moments for a lifetime, which matters more in life in regards to becoming a whole new you.

As I said before, having fresh eyes allows you to truly see or should I say focus on people places or things, especially if those places are Comic Cons where attending, as well as dressing up in cosplay as one's favorite fictional characters fills your life with enjoyment. Granted, not too many people aren't able to understand the pure fascination or in some cases the obsession of wearing a costume practically all day at a place filled where it can quite literally bring out your inner child. However, when you do find or meet people with the same enthusiasm regarding everything from purchasing collectables like comic books or collectables to taking pictures of/with your favorite celebrities/cosplayers one's day is momentously made.

Let me ask you this question in regards to collecting comic books, what is your most favorite and possibly priceless purchase? Thinking about it further, by trading one negative addiction for a given you the opportunity to in all intense and purposes drink in all the purchases you've made after hunting/searching/bidding for them. You see, the successful purchase of one's comic collectables you've set your eyes on is considerably far more satisfying to hold and read than any alcoholic beverage to quench one's thirst don't you think? Let me tell you something, never lose that fire for comic books as it has seemingly brought out a child-like enthusiasm into your life among other things as well.

In retrospect, Brion McAuley is a very much a different man than 5 years ago and has now focused his life on the more positive things in life. Whether it's being an awesome uncle, cosplaying at Comic Cons, purchasing comics, utilizing one's skills as a graphic designer by using photoshop, etc. keep the focus strong in your life. Of course, don't forget you have new found friends to support and not to mention encourage you along the way as well. Ultimately, I say to you my friend continue to build a new life for yourself all-the-while leaving your old life behind knowing full well second chances seem to be at times a hard rarity to come by these days. In the end, I think you yourself summed up this yodaism best when I mentioned it to you with just one word...potatoes.

Wednesday, August 03, 2016

Up For The Challenge

Dr. Steve Maraboli once said, ~Rise to the challenge of bring your dreams to life! Do not be discouraged by resistance; be nourished by it. Success is the experience of rising to the level of your true greatness.~ Let me ask you this question, have many of life's challenges have you been able to not only achieve, but continue to personally/professionally strive for in hopes of being able to accomplish what you've set your mind to in the present, as well as for the near future. For its a thought provoking and not to mention intriguing situation indeed in the type of person you truly are even though you may not see it in yourself.

Without a doubt, to find the challenge in regards to one's own creative side shows there isn't a limit to your imagination. In other words, what you think up in your mind turns to a potential planning stage inevitably ends up becoming a reality. What it primarily comes to mind is cosplay and showing how much of fan you are when it involves a particular television and/or movie fandom, such as Star Wars. Hey, it part of who you are and there is no denying that whatsoever. Of course, the process of thinking up who to be and then putting the costume together can at times be tediously difficult; but the quintessential payoff is absolutely worth it when you're asked to have a picture taken with you or vice versa.

As I said before, cosplay is primarily part of who you are and it's certainly rings true concerning your overall identity. True, you're a Star Wars fan due in part to being introduced by your parents to what I believe is the greatest franchise to ever be a part of or associated with for that matter. For the most part, it in all intense and purposes set the tone for daily life, especially when it involves everything from trivia, referencing quotes and/or collecting memorabilia i.e. POPS Maz Katana you've patiently waited for to finally arrive. In addition, it also includes being passionate about the love you have for Disney so much so your inner fangirl completely took over to the point where it nearly incited a public incident involving young children over a well beloved frozen character.

If you think it, every person has faced or is facing challenges in life, especially when it pertains to matters of the heart. I think it's safe to say when it comes to the dating/relationship department you've put yourself on hiatus and mainly focusing living life with a mixture of your best buds/gal pals by your side. Thinking about it further, you've mentioned in brief conversation that boredom can set in during a date signifying there is a lack of being able to be challenged. When I say challenged, I mean meeting a guy who has the innate ability to not just get your attention, but continually keep it to where genuine interest grows on your part. Let me tell you something, you'll meet that guy who will accept the challenge whoever he may be.

In retrospect, there is more than meets the eye in a non Transformers way if you take a step back and get the overall picture instead of what's on the surface pertaining to one Lauren Parisi. Granted, I don't necessarily know you on a deeply personal basis and haven't met you in person. However, within a 7 month period I can say you value friendship, you're a kickass trivia host, an adventurer when it comes to hunting Pokemon, a parent to a feline named Leia, a lover of red wine I believe or wine in general, etc. Ultimately, there is a considerably vast knowledge that has yet to be unlocked so much so that if one delves considerably deeper you'll might be surprised in what is found. In the end, you have the driving ambition along with the determination to tackle each day and be up for the challenge of whatever or whoever life brings your way.

Monday, August 01, 2016


Saor Alba once said, ~Something stirs within me when I hear the bagpipes play. They reach down deep inside my heart whether close or far away. As I stand and listen something happens deep inside. Their music flows into my soul and fills my heart with pride. But something else is happening. Something you cannot see. For heart begins to wander and longs once more to be free.~ Without a doubt, a sense of restlessness stirs within that represents the struggle between calm and chaos. For its a type of struggle where the seemingly haunting burdens of the heart, soul, and mind are clutched tightly by the claws of a beastly past, so to speak. Essentially, its the yearning to be anywhere but where you are sounds off like a faint beating drum growing increasingly louder so much so it shakes the very core of who you are.

If you think about it, every man has the heart, soul, and mind of a warrior...a Scottish warrior in this particular case. There is a fiery passion both seen and unseen where the bagpipes that quintessentially play the melodies of songs of your life are either positively up or negatively down depending on how the wind blows. Yet, it doesn't hurt raising up a pint or two or three that help blur returning memories whereby greatly numbing a beastly past full of mixed emotions swiping it's ravenous claws with absolute viciousness. Of course, like any true Scottish warrior you pick yourself up despite all the wounds suffered and continue to keep fighting in every sense of the word with hardened determination knowing there is a song being played somewhere out in the distance to the point where the call is heeded to travel far and wide.

As said before, the yearning to be anywhere but where you are sounds off like a faint beating drum growing increasingly louder so much so it shakes the very core of who are. Thinking about it further, it's that same faint sound of the beating drum growing increasingly louder shaking the very core of who you are and what has been shaking is deafening change. I think it's safe to say change is something you've been wanting for quite some time and the chance to carpe diem by seizing change personally, emotionally, mentally, and maybe even spiritually. Granted, the chance to truly exhale and be given a sense of much relief miles away from a place that holds so many memories to places that you'll be able to breathe in to where new memories are made is a change one would gladly take, whether it's merely temporary or a change for the better.

Oftentimes, despite all the painful wounds suffered a Scotsman keeps fighting in every sense of the word with hardened determination knowing there is a song being played somewhere out in the distance to the point where the call us heeded to travel far and wide. True, it's most definitely a much needed call to heed indeed in order to listen, in a manner of speaking, to new melodies and not to mention explore new destinations to where it gives one the opportunity to broaden their horizons. Horizons never before seen, as well as experiences giving new found insight as to witnessing firsthand a whole new atmosphere one has possibly only dreamed about. You see, by broadening one's own horizons you inevitably get the chance to meet in person online strangers who have now become lifelong friends, which a personal worthwhile goal that will certainly be achieved.

In retrospect, the bagpipes are playing a melody whole new set of songs for the warrior Scotsman. A song in which a man chooses to live rather than die in the metaphorical sense. The choice to live to the fullest is a choice you won't regret and don't waste any second of it. You've taken the opportunity to make what was seemingly nothing and ended up turning into something that truly has meaning. Fortunately, the opportunity to hopefully no longer be in a sense a slave to the past breaking away from the chains of what has been holding you down in some way, shape, and/or form. In the end Patrick Gilday, when that day comes to in all intense and purposes spread your wings to fly I dare say you'll have all the freedom to do whatever you want as you take the initial step forward facing a whole new world whatever it may be with unwavering courage.

Saturday, July 30, 2016


Mark Twain once said, ~20 years from now, you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bow line. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade wins in your sail. Explore. Dream. Discover.~ Without a doubt, you never really think how far you've come in regards to pushing yourself mentally, especially when it involves something that was randomly created 20 years ago. For its truly an amazing and humbling thought indeed concerning the longevity of something that was practically non existent back in the day only to become a considerably source of personal knowledge and not to mention a quintessential part of one's semi-daily life. Essentially, it's considered to be a sanctuary of sorts that best represents my own version of Superman's Fortress of Solitude.

As I said before, the ever growing source of personal knowledge attained over a 20 year period storied within the sanctuary that I refer as the inner sanctum represents my own version of Superman's Fortress of Solitude. Thinking about it further, its a metaphorical placed where there are countless chamber doors and behind each one of them are the individual thoughts or should I say yodaisms located inside. It's when I want to reflect back, as well as reminisce on any particular thought I in all intense and purposes stand in front a specific door, so to speak, inevitably opening a part of a possibly meaningful past at the time. A written past containing a plethora of mixed emotions that started in the very beginning with the thought of absolute uncertainty from a 19 year old kid about to graduate high school.

Oftentimes, when I've entered my online sanctuary to look back on all that I written in the past 20 years I'm not disappointed or utterly embarrassed at what's been posted because like I mentioned before it's part of my past. As a matter of fact, it's a mental timeline of how far I've come to the point where there is a possibility of reaching a point where there's nothing left to say because my mind is all tapped out. However, there's always going to something said by someone or read somewhere that will be that initial spark setting off something for me to write then posted for those who are interested to read. In any case, all the thoughts that have been accumulated whether they were good, bad, and everything in between were all coming from a place where I've taken a step back in order to keenly observe, as well as comprehend life, love, and certainly relationships in my own weirdly, unique way.

If you think about it, being able to document your thoughts in such a public forum for 20 years and counting gives a person like myself the opportunity to have people share their own personal stories involving a particular yodaism posted. I think its safe to say that for quite a number of people they deem it a place where he or she can freely visit reading their personal favorites according to a certain few I know who said they've visited it many times. Why? The answer varies but the one main reason is the simple fact that I have a way of making people think in a such a way it causes a person to want to read it over for a more clear understanding of it all. A perfect example would the yodaism "Art Of Love" comparing matters of the hear to a martial arts tournament, which if you curious I encourage you to check it out and give it a read.

In retrospect, the inner sanctum has, is and will always be a real place that has considerable meaning when it comes to bearing my own heart, mind, and/or soul. True, it may not be well-known or in fact even popular; but worth of mouth has spread about it to where it has sort of a Field Of Dreams if you build it they will come type following. Of course, it will still be online when I'm no longer living this earthly existence because after all it is the internet where nothing ever truly dies. Granted, it may even be forgotten but for a period of time it was relevant to me as it became my sounding board/soap box to express what's been weighing on my mind. In the end, every person hopes to achieve a legacy they can proudly look back on and 20 years from now I hope I still have something to put behind another chamber door because as far as I'm concerned I still have more to say.

Tuesday, July 19, 2016

Free Your Heart

The Oracle from the 1st Matrix movie once said, ~I'm gonna let you in on a little secret. Being the one is just like being in love. No one needs to tell you you're in love; you just know it, through and through.~ Without a doubt, matters of the heart and the main character Neo in the sci fi blockbuster movie The Matrix are most definitely synonymous with each other. How? Essentially, the unknown, hidden potential held within both that once it's unleashed an absolutely extraordinary, unexplainable power is never felt ever before unlike any other so much so one word can best be expressed...whoa. For it can certainly be a struggle and not to mention a bewildering situation indeed in trying to figure it out all-the-while tapping into your own thought, feelings, and/or emotions. For it's a type of unexplainable power in which you can/will find yourself making a life altering choice.

As I said before, a life altering choice can/will be made pertaining to one's own heart in the sort of way Morpheous gave Neo the following two choices: take the blue pill or red pill. Of course, the blue pull represented the end of what could have been whereas the red pill represented the chance to see how far the rabbit hole goes. In other words, there comes a point in every person's life where someone you meet who is so uniquely intriguing you'll take the red pill to knowingly or unknowingly experience an oftentimes painfully harsh, mind bending reality of epic proportions. Thinking about it further, the deeper you go into the proverbial rabbit hole representing your own heart the likelihood you'll metaphorically come face to face with the frustrating/annoying version of the dark shaded, black suited, ear piece wearing Agents in the form of our own thoughts, feelings, and emotions.

If you think about it, when it comes to encountering and inevitably battling are thoughts, feelings, and emotions known as The Agents it's not as easy as it looks by any means whatsoever. In a sense, we can find ourselves dodging bullets in Neo like fashion to avoid getting hurt but that's not always the case. Truth be told, it's considerably difficult at times in finding any type of a winning strategy battling against a ruthless adversary who somehow comes at you in every direction ala countless Agent Smiths against Neo in the 2nd movie Reloaded. Hey, we've all been or are currently in a situation where the overwhelming sense of what we're thinking and/or feeling can at times be as if they're piling on top of you one after another to the point where it's hard to breathe. What it primarily comes down to is having the mindset that even though you may lose the battle in the form of rejection, the war of inner mental and emotional turmoil for true happiness still wages on.

Let me ask this question to those who have watched the 3rd installment Matrix Revolutions, what happens to Neo when he and Trinity head to Machine City? The answer is Neo's sight was taken away from him by Smith who has assimilated himself into the body of Bane. You see, from that point on Neo relies on his other sight perceiving the world in golden light to where he ends up saving the day but sacrifices himself in the process. I think it's safe to say when we're unable to see clearly in every sense of the word because of being in all intense and purposes attacked by our thoughts, feelings, and emotions we blind fold ourselves or should I say simply close our eyes whereby shutting out the seemingly chaotic world around us in order to get a much better perspective. Fortunately, no self sacrifice needed. Ultimately, by doing that you're given a far better calming, appreciation to where you let yourself focus and see a world, in a manner of speaking, in form of a guy/girl who saves the day making the darkness and gloom completely go away around you by brightly shining forth their golden positivity. This goes both way.

In retrospect, I'm personally plugged into The Matrix that is otherwise known as living the single life with a care free mentality. A care free mentality that is able to stretch far beyond than I am capable of ever imagining for myself. True, I make the rules of my own reality and in a way bend them to my own unique and incredibly weird way and so far I'm have an awesome time. Now, until I meet my reason to unplug from the Matrix and take the red pill and see how far the rabbit hole goes in the form of not only my heart, but that certain special someone in question's heart also I've swallowed the blue pill for now. In the end, to those who are presently in a blue pill/red pill situation and just want to free your heart by taking the red pill now because you want to fall in love; I say be patient with all that is in your heart because as it's been said before timing is everything and when it's time you'll know it as love/true love is so worth waiting for.