Wednesday, June 21, 2017

Waiting To Exhale

Someone once said, ~Loving a child no matter what age, makes your break in places you never knew existed.~ Without a doubt, the loss of any child in regards to death or have gone missing is most definitely a tremendously heavy burden to carry within a parent's heart. A kind of personal, hellish torture so unbelievably painful it can not only be difficult to breathe, but think as well. For it's an incredibly heartbreaking situation indeed at the sheer thought of having no idea of the whereabouts or experiencing the unfortunate loss of a part of parent's heart and soul, especially at an early age. Sadly, the possibility of unwavering hope can unfortunately turn to absolute tragedy as family and friends struggle in trying to make sense of the loss itself, which is a feeling that never really goes away no matter how many years have passed.

As I said before, the loss of any child in regards to death or have gone missing is most definitely a tremendously heavy burden to carry within a parent's heart. Thinking about it further, the heavy burden is in a sense a huge weight of emotions ranging anger and frustration to absolute disbelief that metaphorically wrap so tightly around a parent's heart it feels like being in a straightjacket one can't ever escape from no matter how hard you try. True, when a parent is emotionally struggling in trying to remove the unwanted emotions stirring within it can get so overwhelming that there's an innate feeling of not being able to breathe as if you're in some ways suffocating. Thinking about it further, it's that same unwanted emotions piling on all at once, in a manner of speaking, to where it can lead to become claustrophobic within yourself.

If you think about it, when it comes to a missing child or an untimely death of one the ability to think clearly has its difficulties. A mother, more so than a father, will get into a mental mindset focusing all her energy into trying to stay positive as best she can even though there are millions of overwhelming thoughts swirling/bombarding her head in such a way it can very well push her to the brink of insanity. Oftentimes, the act of keeping herself busy in some ways helps as a distraction from mentally dealing with potentially accepting a harsh reality even though she refuses to until there is solid evidence to the contrary. Hey, it's what any mother I suppose would in order to keep herself from falling apart knowing full well if she does take a moment to herself the proverbial mental flood gates will open leading to the flood of emotional tears pouring out of her.

Let me ask you this question to all you parents out there, what is your greatest fear when it involves your kids? If you answered getting taken by a stranger or passing away too soon you'd possibly be correct. I think it's safe to say no parent wants to ever find himself/herself burying their son and/or daughter under circumstances in which his/her life was tragically cut short before it has even started. As much as being able to imagine the proverbial "what if" of a precious life continuing to exist instead of experiencing an untimely ending, hold on to the cherished memories no matter how big of small they are. What it primarily comes down it is celebrating their life on a daily basis knowing full well they did in fact bring joy to your life in some way, shape, or form so much so you either smiled, laughed, and/or cried.

On June 5th, 2017 12 year old Pensacola, FL native Naomi Jones' body was found after she went missing on May 31st, 2017. A young girl's life filled with so much joy and potential for the future cut short too soon. Ultimately, Jones' death is a senseless tragedy perpetrated by a monster who failed to register as a sex offender. Hopefully, a far better resolution should come to pass when it comes to having stricter policies on registering sex offenders because other cases resembling Naomi Jones' have yet to be solved. Unfortunately, it's those unsolved cases of a child/children reported missing or otherwise have parents who haven't been able to truly exhale in being able to get the closure they deserve. In the end, it's those parents who are waiting to exhale that if or when they do get closure of any kind I hope they'll breathe much easier and with that also have a sense of long overdue peace.

Sunday, June 04, 2017

A Breath of Fresh Air

Tyler Hayden once said, ~Life is like a fan on a hot day - behind it you're missing out, but in front you feel the advantage.~ If you think about it, life is in some ways like a fan or in this particular case an electric fan. How and in what way you may be asking yourself? Essentially, you want to stand in front of it rather than behind it in order to experience the pleasure of the comfortably cool air and not the hot air that's tremendously uncomfortable. In other words, when it comes to life itself each one of us want to experience for ourselves the exhilarating breeze of excitement concerning living life and not being afraid in taking some risks while doing so. What it primarily comes down to is stepping out from the behind your comfort zone that can at times be incredibly hot and stuffy, so to speak, and gradually go with the flow wherever life takes you.

Without a doubt, being able to stand in front of and enjoy the comfortable breeze of living life most definitely feels good in every sense of the word. For it's certainly an absolute blast indeed as there is an innate energy felt when you step from behind the metaphorical hot and stuffy comfort zone to enjoy the quintessential cool wave of having fun, especially when your best buds/gal pals are by your side. You see, it's all a matter of perspective and having an uniquely weird/crazy/odd outside of the box way of doing/looking at things. Thinking about it further, whether its by yourself or with your partners in crime you take the opportunity to play around in a talking into the fan and trying to sound like Darth Vader kind of way, which we've all done back in the day. Hey, even though it may be deemed absolutely childish you do it regardless what other thinking because it puts a smile on your face.

As I said before, you would rather in front of the fan instead of behind it so you can in all intense and purposes be propelled forward as it pertains to one's professional career. I think it's safe to say there are times where the potential of moving forward in a new career path can certainly be a scary situation for anyone thinking about changing professions and it's not as simple as pressing buttons on a fan. True, even though you can easily press a button to change the space, speed and direction of the air it doesn't necessarily work that way job wise as there are a number of options given in regards to the proverbial pace/speed/direction concerning the possibility of a career choices. Unfortunately, it's not as simple as pressing 3 or 4 buttons as we have to take into account a number of buttons to press, in a manner speaking, in considering the best decision made for a new career path chosen.

Let me ask you this question to those living the single life regarding the dating scene, how many of you are standing behind the fan of your of your own heart because of experiencing utter heartbreak. Oftentimes, there's a mindset that it's much safer to protect one's self behind the fan that it your own heart and what keeps you from moving forward are the rotating fan blades of past pain. In a sense, each fan blade is considered to be a representation of doubt, anger, confusion, hatred, fear, bitterness, utter contempt, disappointment, frustration, etc. that help shield you from potentially getting hurt again. However, if you want to ever truly fall in love again you have to force yourself to move in front of/away from the hot air of painful past issues being dealt with for quite some times and all it takes is a guy/girl who has the ability to somehow circulate some much needed freshly cool air within your own heart.

Chris Assaad said,~The fact is that there is an ebb and flow to life. There are highs and lows. There is bitter and sweet. There are gray days and sunny days and it’s all part of the package. If it were peaches, sunshine and roses all the time we’d probably get bored pretty quickly.~ In retrospect, when it comes to the fan of life we're all going to experience the type of glitches where it seems the soothing air isn't coming our way in form of not spending enough time with friends, not being able to find a job that's less stressful, finally meeting someone who you'll fall in love that doesn't blow hot air in your face or whatever the case may be. Ultimately, take it with stride without complaining because it doesn't help matters any. In the end, be patience for that soothing breeze to come your way and when you do eventually do experience what you've been patiently waiting for it will hit like a breath of fresh air.

Thursday, May 11, 2017

Me, Myself and I

Sarah L. Harvey once said, ~Love yourself without shame. Without fear of being selfish or silly. Love yourself wildly, ridiculously without a single once of restraint, Love your real, messy, gritty, raw, rapturous, divine self. Because where has hating yourself ever gotten you?~ Let me ask you this question to my fellow single peeps out there, does it really matter if you don't end up falling in love? For it's certainly a thought provoking situation indeed to ponder that particular question knowing that maybe being in a strong, worthwhile relationship is not often the case to be truly happy. Thinking about it further, living the single life while focusing on yourself in a selfishly positive rather than negative way is considered to be the best alternative as it potentially gives you a whole new perspective on life without the possibility of love/true love.

Without a doubt, any person who experienced in the past utter heartbreak has every right in wanting to be selfish in regards to their own heart in a positive way of course. Trust, faith, honesty, respect, intimacy, understanding, commitment, communication etc. are considerably important aspects of true happiness you want to regain back after it's all been taken from you, so to speak. True, it's the desire of any single person's heart who feels they are absolutely deserving of it. Yet, instead of fulfilling the desire of wanting to fall in love focus on being able to fulfill the desires of your own personal journey of self discovery. You see, it's during your time of enjoying the freedom of having crazy fun you're given the opportunity in gaining wisdom, as well as new memorable experiences to the point where there is a gradual metaphorical rebirth of sorts in a mental and emotional way.

As I said before, while enjoying the freedom of doing your own thing you're given the opportunity in gaining wisdom, as well as new memorable experiences to the point where there is a gradual metaphorical rebirth of sorts in a mental and emotional way. In other words, taking a vacation from thinking and feeling that's been long overdue concerning matters of your own heart in which it had you or is having you constantly fighting what seems like a losing battle at times of who you are as an individual. Oftentimes, a much needed mental and emotional break is in order to gradually regain your sense of self and not to mention your inner strength unfortunately drained by bad past relationships. Hey, it may take days, weeks, month, and/or years to feel fully renewed but its well worth it in the long run so much so you become much stronger in ever sense of the word.

For the question can be asked to those on their own proverbial walkabout of rediscovering yourself, has there ever come a point where you've thought to yourself it just may be better off being single? I think it's safe to say everyone including myself at some point has considered to forever live a life of being a bachelor/bachelorette. You see, there is innate selfish mindset where flying solo has its financial advantages and add to that the comforting notion of not having to deal with the stress of dating and the issues associated with it. In addition, spending time by yourself is considerably liberating as it provides you the chance to go wherever you want whenever you want to and not be questioned about it. Essentially, anyone who is single would feel very protective of not wanting to disturb a life of harmonious, blissful solitude you've grown so accustomed do.

In retrospect, when you're single there aren't any restraints to hold you back and to a certain extant you make your own rules. Of course, those aforementioned rules only make sense to you even though it may be considered weird or absolutely silly to others as it applies to what you're passionate about. Hey, it's that passion that shows the real, raw, and gritty side that's inside you waiting to reveal itself, which can be a scary albeit therapeutic experience while trying to figure yourself out. In the end, for how long your time of singledom lasts be open with and go for any adventure that comes your way as each new experience positively fuels the passion within your heart; but until the moment you find yourself wanting or should I say allowing it to slowly open it up to a certain guy/girl your only focus is to the following three people: me, myself, and I.

Monday, May 01, 2017

Etched In Stone

Ursula K. Le Grun once said, ~Love doesn't sit there like a stone, it has to be made like bread; remade all the time, made new.~ Without a doubt, there are times when you're living the single life it can seem as if you're metaphorically standing in front of your own heart with chisel and hammer in hand in order to reshape it like a stone sculptor. For it can most definitely be a tremendously long process indeed to say the least in trying to smoothly shape your own heart to what you imagine it to be, especially when love/true love is involved. Essentially, it takes a considerable amount of patience in working to in all intense and purposes chisel out how its intended to look to what it actually looks like, which is considered at times to be a far better end result than you've imagined.

If you think about it, when you're single you have a tendency to spend a considerable amount of time just taking a step back, in a manner of speaking, visualizing as a whole one's proverbial heart of stone. True, it can sometimes take days, weeks, months, and/or years to get any kind of feel/idea pertaining to a guy/girl who truly inspires you to start chiseling away piece by piece in hopes it gradually forms into true happiness. Hey, while standing there with chisel and hammer in hand representing one's thoughts, feelings, as well as emotions there can inevitably be indecisiveness concerning where to start or not even start at all. Thinking about it further, it can get to a point where you'll find yourself continuously walking around your heart, in a manner of speaking, without making any move whatsoever.

As I said before, there's a tremendously long process indeed to try to smoothly shape your own heart to what you want it be, especially when love/true love is involved. Of course, mistakes will probably be made but not too many to where you'll run the risk of chiseling away too much or you find yourself starting completely over from scratch. Unfortunately, a number of people have found themselves starting over experiencing utter heartbreak whereby important relationship pieces such as trust, hope, faith, respect, honor, intimacy, understanding, communication, commitment, etc. are chiseled off. Sadly, what first started out largely as the potential for endless possibilities would dwindle down to absolutely nothing so much so there's quite possibly a lack of inspiration to make a move regarding a certain guy/girl in question.

Let me ask this question to those who are artfully inclined in the area of stone sculpting, what is the most difficult part of the process? The answer is don't try to be perfect because once that mentality sets in of wanting absolute perfection it puts more pressure on yourself to where a plethora of mixed emotions like anger and frustration set in. In a sense, when it comes to matters of the heart you have to realize it's the imperfections that make establishing a strong, worthwhile relationship absolutely perfect. In other words, as much as you want to chisel off/smooth out the uniquely weird and not to mention rough aspect of your heart pertaining to who you are just leave them as is. You see, even though it may not feel/look aesthetically pleasing to one person it does to someone else who will appreciate the imperfections that are seen/felt as considerably special to him/her.

In retrospect, patience does in fact plays a big part regarding the stone that is one's own heart and it's summed by the following two words: don't rush. For the most part, just take your time in carefully figuring out what you want to take shape personally, mentally, emotionally and most importantly spiritually. Oftentimes, by giving yourself the time to get to know yourself that's when you'll be able to get/find that much needed inspiration to chisel away from the inside-out instead of the outside-in. Granted, the finished product that is someday falling in love/being in love with your forever best friend won't necessarily be finished as it will always be a work in progress. In the end, all I can say is to my fellow single peeps is keep busy chiseling away doing your own thing having fun and someday without even realizing it you'll meet someone who'll have their name permanently etched in stone on your heart.

Wednesday, April 26, 2017

The Message

Amy Larson once said, ~There is a distinct difference between what you hear and what a person is actually saying. When you listen to them using what you know; what you've learned what you want to say next. If you truly want to understand and connect forget every you know.~ If you think about it, to truly understand and genuinely connect with a guy/girl forget everything you know, especially when it pertains to matters of the heart. For it's most definitely a tough task indeed to do because of how insanely frustrating and confusing it can be at times. I think it's safe to say there are those who can make a clear distinction between knowing what being in a strong, worthwhile relationship is all about and having an absolute understanding of what it really mean to be in one. What it primarily comes down to is being able to distinguish between hearing and listening.

Let me ask this question to those who are in a potential and/or significant relationship, did you have any preconceived notion as to what being in a deeply committed relationship would be like? I think its safe to say there were maybe some preconceived notions and then a reality check was given. Of course, the aforementioned reality comes in the form of the following 5 words in the form of a question: "Are you listening to me?" Women, more often tend to ask that particular question and then some to the point where the following 4 words follow afterwards: "You just don't understand." Thinking about it further, most of what being in a deeply committed relationship with someone you love is about listening to and trying understanding you're partner's wants and/or needs knowing full well there will be miscommunication from time to time.

Without a doubt, women want a guy who'll be able to actively listen rather than just hear them to the point of paying attention to where he understands the situation so much so a response is hopefully given that's helpful and/or informative. Of course, it's just not our ears that should be open as our heart should be open as well, which helps create a deeper level of understanding between two people. Oftentimes, by listening with open ears and heart it shows her that she's important enough to give our undivided personal, as well as emotional attention to. Plus, it makes any female feel good inside to where she can't help but smile. Essentially, it's that type of listening and deep level of understanding that is considered to be a rarity these days for females living the single life to come across in regards to a guy and yet he's out there somewhere.

For the question can be asked to you ladies who are a significant relationship, does your forever best friend know your likes and dislikes? Here's another question does your forever best friend understand the reasoning behind why you like/dislike certain things? You see, there is innate level of deep understanding that is considerably meaningful in a very special way when a certain special someone listens to and is able to understand why you may or may not like a certain movie/food instead of just knowing about it as if it's just something that's merely trivial. Ultimately, there's a sense of scary vulnerability when a woman is so comfortable around someone she loves with all her heart she's willing to open herself up because she's found the person who absolutely understands who she is in every sense of the word and not to mention how she ticks, in a manner of speaking, in her own unique way.

Someone said, ~I speak because I know my needs. I speak with hesitation because I know not yours. My words come from my life's experiences. Your understanding comes from yours. Because of this, what I say and what you hear may not be the same. So, if you will listen carefully, not only with your ears, but with your eyes and heart. Maybe somehow we can communicate.~ In retrospect, part of what makes true happiness such a worthwhile experience is being able to listen to each other and effectively communicate the shared understanding of what each other is trying to clearly convey. In other words, a partnership where a continuous open line of communication without fear of confrontation has been established. In the end, to have a partner who makes the conscious effort to listen, understand the message, and then talk it out together as two mature adults instead of argue of over it gives you hope for when someday eventually happens.

Thursday, April 13, 2017

Half The Battle

Someone once said, ~The strongest people are not those who show strength in front of us but those who win battles we know nothing about.~ If you think about it, there are countless people who are fighting countless battles that can't be outwardly seen. A silent battle that can most definitely be either mental, emotional, and/or physical to the where it's an absolute unknown if any given day will have an individual experiencing highs, lows, or something in between. In other words, riding their own metaphorical rollercoaster of thoughts, feelings, and or emotions that isn't fun at all so much so he/she would gladly stop the ride in order to get off knowing how much of a toll it takes on him/her. I think it's safe to say it's a tough and not to mention frustrating situation indeed for anyone fighting for peace, as well as a sense of utter normalcy in regards to living life while dealing with the painful struggle of their own disorder/condition.

As I said before, there are countless people who are fighting countless battles that can't be outwardly seen. Of course, one of the battles that's silently fought is depression and when it comes to the statistics they don't necessarily mean much in the whole scheme of things if a person hasn't experienced it firsthand for himself/herself. For the most part, it's sometimes described as living in a personal nightmarish hell where being emotionally stuck or overtaken by the state of a particular mood like sadness leads to an inability to get out of it on their own. Essentially, once in that emotional mood state it's considerably difficult to break free whereby it becomes a quintessential straightjacket that grows tighter and tighter when trying to remove it, so to speak. Fortunately, it can be in all intense and purposes be removed with the right medication, therapy, and/or from the unwavering support of family/friends by one's side.

Without a doubt, finding yourself in a constantly physical battle in the form of painfully, tender muscles, joints, and/or bones is truly a fight in itself as it pertains to Fibromyalgia. For it's a chronic disorder in which a person experiences a much more intense pain in the aforementioned 3 areas. Granted, even though there may not be a mental battle being fought it does have the capacity to put a tremendous amount of mental stress along with the stress they're possibly feeling physically and maybe even emotionally as well. Oftentimes, it's the simplest things in life like taking a walk makes a significant impact, especially if cold or rainy weather is involved. Unfortunately, there is no known cure for Fibromyalgia but that doesn't mean life's over. Far from it. What it primarily comes down to is lifestyle changes along with treatments in hopes in helping to physically live a much less painful life.

Let me ask you this question to those who are fighting a continuous battle with anxiety, how are you able to deal with a disorder/condition that has the power to completely disable you mentally in every sense of the word. Medication, counseling, and/or other alternative methods such as all-natural supplements are what a number of people are going for. Granted, in ever day life it's considerably normal to feel anxiousness, panic, and worry. However, in extreme cases the type of anxiety one suffers can have him/her suffer and have it be so overwhelming it completely disrupts the ability to lead a normal life. Thinking about it further, to having anxiety related panic attacks can wreak havoc on one's social life because of how incredibly uncomfortable it can you'll isolate yourself from the outside world. So, the question remains are you isolating yourself from the outside world or exuding a fighting mindset to be a part of it?

In retrospect, there's an old saying in order to really understand what someone is going through you must walk a mile in their shoes. I think it's safe to say it would give a whole new perspective for anyone who has never experienced anything like what people suffering from depression, Fibromyalgia, anxiety related panic attacks, or whatever the case may be are going through each day. Hey, I have to tip my hat to those continuing to go to war fighting the good fight with their disorder/condition even though there are days where it may seem or feel like a losing battle. You see, even though I may not know what you're personally going through I've at least gotten a slightly better and deeper understanding of it after taking the time to do my own research. In the end, all it ever takes is for someone willing to want know every mile metaphorically walked pertaining to a certain disorder/condition and if matters of the heart are involved knowing is half the battle.

Wednesday, April 05, 2017

The Last Ride

WWE's Undertaker once said, ~We(Triple H) are the last of an era and a dying breed...The thing I find interesting is that he has figured out how to destroy The Undertaker. How to make the Undertaker disappear forever. Well, it's really quite simple. All you have to do is beat the Undertaker at WrestleMania. Easier said than done...Make no mistake I play no game and I bow down to no man, especially the King of Kings...I am indeed The Last Outlaw.~ Without a doubt, when it comes to the sport of professional wrestling none is more respected and not to mention deserving of the title G.O.A.T(Greatest Of All Time). As he said, the man who dug holes, as well as took souls was the last of an era and considered to be the only remaining connection in keeping wrestling's past alive. For he's most definitely is a legend in the business to the point where he's left a lasting legacy that's already cemented him into the WWE Hall of Fame. Ultimately, what's left to say that has already been said other than the following two words: thank you.

Thank you for evolving as a character over the past 27 years giving fans like myself the opportunity to witness the gradual change in personas. Of course, who could forget his debut in 1990's Survivor Series as the Western Mortician and then 4 years later his progression into The Deadman after a brief hiatus from the ring. The metamorphosis would continue as he would be reborn into the Lord of Darkness with a teardrop tattoo under his right eye, which would inevitably have him slip into a much darker 1999 version of the character lasting a year long as the Ministry of Darkness. A leader who answered to "a higher power" and it turned out to be Vince McMahon. In any case, a few months later he would reinvent himself into motorcycle riding American Badass inevitably morphing into the bully Big Evil. Once again a change would take place after and then rise up from the ashes, so to speak, as The Deadman. Finally, he would take up a combination of all his past personas portraying what we all would come to know as The Last Outlaw.

Thank you for giving us fans something we wanted to never be broken and that is the WrestleMania unbeaten streak or otherwise known as The Streak. Thinking about it further, the unbeaten WrestleMania streak was considered to be at least in my own opinion a truly impressive record indeed that defined his career. You see, when it comes to the streak itself each and every fan including myself personally felt protective of it in a very vocal way. Why? Essentially, it was deemed incredibly sacred that it should stand the test of pro wrestling time and never be surpassed by any current/future stars on the WWE. Unfortunately, it didn't happen as it was shockingly broken at WrestleMania 30 by Brock Lesnar and 3 years later the loss still makes a significant impact to where it's been debated on who's far more deserving of beating the streak instead of The Beast. Hey, as a pro wrestling fan the streak was one of the main things that fired us up and at the same time experienced a rollercoaster of mixed emotions in its purest form because of it.

Thank you for providing us underlying meaning to an historic and legendary career. What do I mean? Essentially, that underlying meaning is being associated with my childhood and how in some weird way it kept alive the pure love/enjoyment of my generation who grew up watching him since debuting as The Undertaker in 1990 at the Survivor Series. True, he was known as Mean Mark Callous in WCW utilizing his signature finishing move the heart punch before becoming the reaper of wayward souls of the WWE who metaphorically put the nail in the coffin of ever opponent he's faced after tombstoning them. Personally speaking, I had the honor and the privilege of being at Wrestlemania 33 in Orlando and watch what was probably his last match against Roman Reigns, which was considerably bittersweet. What made it even more bittersweet was witnessing him take off and leave his gear in the middle of the ring signifying his possible retirement whereby closing the door, so to speak, on part of my childhood that will fondly rest in peace.

In retrospect, the Undertaker provided the WWE universe over a decade of destruction along with countless memories we'll never forget within the confines of what was referred to as "your yard". Granted, it would have been awesome the dream match between Undertaker and Sting happened once The Icon finally signed with the WWE after 13 years. Sadly, it never happened but who knows anything could happen. If you think about it, wrestlers come and go in a business that has a tendency to oftentimes forget/ignore the immense contributions they've made while putting their body's on the line all year round. Fortunately, Undertaker's immense contributions will certainly not be forgotten or ignored for that matter because of how truly beloved he has become. It's safe to say when you think of WWE or pro wrestling in general Taker is quite possibly the first thing you think of. In the end, thank you once again for everything and if this is the last ride knowing there's nothing else left to prove after all you've accomplished then I respectfully tip my hat.