Plead The Fifth

Charles Caleb Cotton once said, ~We strive to hide our hearts from ourselves as from others, and always with more success; for in deciding upon our own case we are both judge, jury, and executioner, and where sophistry cannot overcome the first, or flattery the second, self-love is always ready to defeat the sentence of bribing the third.~ If you think about it, after going through a breakup and taking some time for self reflection you can’t help but imagine the guy/girl in question going through a trial of sorts. A trial in which their own heart has been put on an internal witness stand to get answers. For it’s a thought provoking situation indeed as he/she is mentally/emotionally defending decisions of their own heart while at the same time picking apart those same decisions like a prosecuting attorney.

As I said before, after going through a breakup you can’t help but imagine the guy/girl in question going through a trial of sorts. A trial in which their own heart has been put on an internal witness stand to get answers. I think it's safe to say when a person goes through an emotional/mental self-reflection one’s internal quality of defense steps in, so to speak, and tries to prove innocence rather than guilt involving the actions/choices made that ended up turning out to be an absolute heartbreaking mistake. Essentially, the case is made for the defense that there is beyond a reasonable doubt concerning not being entirely at fault for what was said/done. Essentially, it’s just the matter of proving and showing the body of evidence exhibited, which hopefully sways the jury of one’s own thoughts, feelings, and/or emotions.

Without a doubt, the same body of evidence previously mentioned above in helping prove the case of innocence can also be harshly criticized/ridiculed through extensive cross examination. It’s a type of cross examination where one’s internal prosecuting attorney aggressively takes apart the credibility of innocence pertaining to the evidence presented. Of course, the hostility one goes through can turn argumentative, whereby experiencing issues of anger, doubt, hatred, worry, sadness, frustration, bitterness, disappointment, utter contempt, etc. Oftentimes, it feels as if you’re badgering the witness that is your own heart with so much self-aggression and animosity. Why? You see, deep down a part of you doesn’t want to know or can’t handle the actual truth thus making the burden of proof all that much more clear and convincing.

Burden of proof is defined as: the legal standard that requires the defense and prosecution to provide evidence to demonstrate the claim is valid. Let me ask this question: have you ever given the “it's not me it’s you” speech whenever things don’t quite work out in your dating relationship? Also, how many times have you said it knowing a small part of you considers yourself to be an actual repeat offender? A repeat offender that gets convicted of making the same mistakes that not only leads to utter heartbreak, but you end up incarcerated, in a manner of speaking, within the cell of your own heart. Ultimately, that lengthy back and forth internal face off can certainly take its toll mentally and emotionally to the point where you’d rather remain single than face the reality of the cold, hard truth staring at you in the face.

In retrospect, we can be our own harshest judge and each time our heart gets broken it can most definitely feel like you’ve handed down a sentence that was given by the jury of your thoughts, feelings, and/or emotions. Thinking about it further, a person can get to a point of executing on himself/herself a protective self-imposed prison sentence within their own heart in order to avoid being truthful about why they're so unlucky when it comes to a strong, worthwhile relationship. What it primarily comes down to is just taking personal accountability and accepting that you may be the problem. In the end, some people would rather plead the fifth and be held in contempt rather than self-incriminate themselves knowing their case for true happiness has not only been growing considerably weak for quite some time, but gradually crumbling as well.