Be Curious, Not Judgmental

E.E. Cummings once said, ~ Once we believe in ourselves, we can risk curiosity, wonder, spontaneous delight, or any experience that reveals the human spirit.~ Without a doubt, one of the aspects that makes matters of the heart so mysteriously intriguing is the power of curiosity. For it’s a thought provoking situation indeed when you encounter someone, whether it be by happenstance or serendipity, it causes you to become genuinely curious to the point where you’re mentally bombarded with so many questions. It’s one’s own natural curiosity in asking questions that can most definitely work for or against you, especially if you’re the type of person who overthinks situations relating to a certain someone of interest.

If you think about it, asking questions is part of living the single life in regards to a guy/girl you’re potentially interested in. I think it’s safe to say it can certainly be a hit or miss in figuring out who the individual you’re trying to get to know on a personal level without overstepping any boundaries involving topics deemed too personal. Oftentimes, you never really know what the right questions are to ask so you end up sticking to the standard questions of like/dislikes involving one’s taste in food, tv shows, movies, music, etc. Although they’re considered softball questions, it allows two individuals to patiently take their time with one another in order to be able to establish a gradual organic connection.

As I said before, it’s one’s own natural curiosity in asking questions that can most definitely work for or against you, especially if you’re the type of person who overthinks situations relating to a certain someone of interest. Essentially, overthinking does more harm than good leading a person to be stuck in their head to where he’s/she’s imagining and possibly believing a worst case scenario in his/her head happening causing an unfortunate self-sabotage in which your highly judgmental of yourself. Thinking about it further, its a self-imposed mental and not to mention emotional torture one puts himself/herself through that has you turning your incredibly neurotic dial up to or way passed an 11, so to speak.

Let me ask this question to those who are in a potential and/or significantly strong, worthwhile relationship. Are you still curious and asking questions when it comes to your best friend for life? I think it's safe to say part of what keeps a relationship a mystery is continuing to have that innate curiosity in which the questions never stop being asked. Of course, one of the pitfalls of a relationship is when you’re no longer curious and the questions stop being asked, which is considered to be scary. In other words, the mystery is gone. However, when facing those questions it should be absolutely scary, but they’ll truly serve a purpose in having the relationship go in the right direction instead of no direction at all.

In retrospect, part of what makes love/true love so tremendously remarkable is the risk taken that simply started with a small spark of curiosity. True, it's from an initial small spark of curiosity in which there's hopefully a gradual gain of a much deeper understanding of that certain someone without any judgment whatsoever and vice versa. Hey, it's considered to be a rarity to find these days, but it's out there. For the most part, you just have to believe in where the curiosity of true happiness takes you and don’t be too quick to judge the human spirit of someone who has genuinely good intentions when asking thought provoking questions. In the end, Walt Whitman summed it best with the following 4 words: “Be curious, not judgmental.”