Wednesday, April 26, 2017

The Message

Amy Larson once said, ~There is a distinct difference between what you hear and what a person is actually saying. When you listen to them using what you know; what you've learned what you want to say next. If you truly want to understand and connect forget every you know.~ If you think about it, to truly understand and genuinely connect with a guy/girl forget everything you know, especially when it pertains to matters of the heart. For it's most definitely a tough task indeed to do because of how insanely frustrating and confusing it can be at times. I think it's safe to say there are those who can make a clear distinction between knowing what being in a strong, worthwhile relationship is all about and having an absolute understanding of what it really mean to be in one. What it primarily comes down to is being able to distinguish between hearing and listening.

Let me ask this question to those who are in a potential and/or significant relationship, did you have any preconceived notion as to what being in a deeply committed relationship would be like? I think its safe to say there were maybe some preconceived notions and then a reality check was given. Of course, the aforementioned reality comes in the form of the following 5 words in the form of a question: "Are you listening to me?" Women, more often tend to ask that particular question and then some to the point where the following 4 words follow afterwards: "You just don't understand." Thinking about it further, most of what being in a deeply committed relationship with someone you love is about listening to and trying understanding you're partner's wants and/or needs knowing full well there will be miscommunication from time to time.

Without a doubt, women want a guy who'll be able to actively listen rather than just hear them to the point of paying attention to where he understands the situation so much so a response is hopefully given that's helpful and/or informative. Of course, it's just not our ears that should be open as our heart should be open as well, which helps create a deeper level of understanding between two people. Oftentimes, by listening with open ears and heart it shows her that she's important enough to give our undivided personal, as well as emotional attention to. Plus, it makes any female feel good inside to where she can't help but smile. Essentially, it's that type of listening and deep level of understanding that is considered to be a rarity these days for females living the single life to come across in regards to a guy and yet he's out there somewhere.

For the question can be asked to you ladies who are a significant relationship, does your forever best friend know your likes and dislikes? Here's another question does your forever best friend understand the reasoning behind why you like/dislike certain things? You see, there is innate level of deep understanding that is considerably meaningful in a very special way when a certain special someone listens to and is able to understand why you may or may not like a certain movie/food instead of just knowing about it as if it's just something that's merely trivial. Ultimately, there's a sense of scary vulnerability when a woman is so comfortable around someone she loves with all her heart she's willing to open herself up because she's found the person who absolutely understands who she is in every sense of the word and not to mention how she ticks, in a manner of speaking, in her own unique way.

Someone said, ~I speak because I know my needs. I speak with hesitation because I know not yours. My words come from my life's experiences. Your understanding comes from yours. Because of this, what I say and what you hear may not be the same. So, if you will listen carefully, not only with your ears, but with your eyes and heart. Maybe somehow we can communicate.~ In retrospect, part of what makes true happiness such a worthwhile experience is being able to listen to each other and effectively communicate the shared understanding of what each other is trying to clearly convey. In other words, a partnership where a continuous open line of communication without fear of confrontation has been established. In the end, to have a partner who makes the conscious effort to listen, understand the message, and then talk it out together as two mature adults instead of argue of over it gives you hope for when someday eventually happens.

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