Say Cheese(Last Yodaism of 2007)

Oscar Wilde once said, ~To be natural is such a very difficult pose to keep up.~Without a doubt, many of us love not only taking pictures of other people, but also having pictures taken of ourselves. It's funny how we all tend to turn into quasi models as we prepare to be in a particular pose in order to capture the sometimes spontaneous shots, which may be done several times over because you or that certain someone doesn't like how it turned out. Hey, its part of our human nature to be vain and waiting to look good, cool, hot, fine, gq-ish, etc. before taking a picture so you/that person can upload it on to Facebook, Friendster, and/or Myspace is totally understandable. Let me ask you this question, have you really thought about the go-to-pose you go to when someone is about to take a picture of you and vice versa?

If you think about it, one of the most often used poses is throwing up the peace sign and personally speaking that is my go-to-pose for most of the pictures that I've been in...but I digress. You see, it's basically one of the poses that you do without ever really thinking about it and you have to admit it pretty much can in all intents and purposes be thrown out in many different ways/styles. Pimpin', laid back, gangsta, cross arms, girly girl, upside down, the “Richard Nixon”, etc. are just some of the many ways a person can change it up by giving signage to the camera. Here's a challenge for you, look back at all the pictures you've been recently in or past photos for that matter, count the number of times you have used the peace sign, and it will amaze you to the point where you'll probably start laughing.

Thinking about it, when it comes to my filipino peeps there is one pose that tends to be seen in some, most, or all pictures and that is "the vogue". Essentially, it's best described as the L shaped loser symbol, but it's tilted at an angle to where it's placed under the chin. It would be safe to say that if you are Filipino or are friends with a Filipino you've done it/seen it done. As said before, it's a vogue-like pose in which it represents being a guy who is super pogi(handsome) and for a woman it's super maganda(beautiful), which is something I learned very recently even though I should have known that I'm Filipino myself. In any case, the Filipino vogue is not something that has been patented/trademarked by us...at least I don't think it is and so it can be freely done by anyone who wants to try. So, as a representative of the Filipino people I'm allowing anyone to use "the vogue" to your heart's content.

For the question can be asked of you, are you the type of person who throws up the middle finger as your go-to-pose when someone is about to take your picture? For it's the quintessential I don't give a care having fun attitude a guy or girl gives off that makes snapping a photo with him or her such a gamble because of the unpredictability of it all. Each one of us knows someone or is that someone who when given the opportunity to have their picture taken feel it necessary in their own mind to spice it up, so to speak, with an uncensored middle finger that is not suitable for younger children to view. However, if you're a fan of the actor/comedian Dan Cooke you can throw up the super finger, which is close to crossing the line and yet is censored enough for younger kids for both kids of all ages to see and do.

In retrospect, posing for the camera is something that can be either taken very seriously or just completely off the wall. Oftentimes the best pictures that are taken are the ones that catch people off guard and you see their absolute hilarious expressions. Expressions that may make you laugh, but to the one who got their picture taken it's no laughing matter. Anyways, one of the things to remember when taking a picture is that you sometimes don't have to plan it out because if you do you start getting really irritated with the person who is taking the picture then it takes all the fun out of it. So, my best advice is just to not tense up, relax as much as possible, have fun with it, and make funny faces if you want. In the end, it's when someone takes a picture of you or a group of your friends and the words 'say cheese' is heard that's when you scramble to strike a pose.

What's Left Of Me

Socrates once said, ~My friend...care for your psyche...know thyself...for once we know ourselves, we may learn to care for ourselves...~ Let me ask you this question, when it comes to matters of the heart, how many of you are metaphorically covered by layers and layers of past disappointment, anger, bitterness, resentent, sadness, heartbreak, etc. to the point where it feels like you're wearing a coat. For it's the so-called coat of bad past relationship issues that inhibits any guy/girl from touching your heart. You see, by not dealing with those past issues they will inevitably make you absolutely uncomfortable like a coat and the more times you add on issue after issue it causes your own heart to metaphorically suffocate. Essentially in order for your heart to breathe again you have to strip away three thrings: thoughts, attitude/behavior, and emotions.

Without a doubt, one of those coats that can initially suffocate your heart are the thoughts of a bad past relationship leading you to believe that love or relationships as a whole for that matter are just a waste of time. It would be safe to say we all know someone or are that someone who has this unfortunate mindset that all guys/girls are the same as they're only interested in you to use you for their own selfish pleasure and then then throw you away for their next conquest. It's a sad situation indeed to know someone or be that someone who has been so badly burned it most definitely tears away at you mentally turning him/her/you into a cynical, realist who when potentially meeting someone not like any other guy or girl in the past they'll/you'll weigh the aspect of what love bring you over the logic of how it can hurt you with logic winning out in the end.

Oftentimes, it's the coat of your own attitude/behavior can, in some ways, smother your heart because the more times you are in attack mode when a person pushes the wrong button that cause you to behave in a childish manner, the more likely the coats of disappointment, anger, resentment, bitterness, sadness, heartbreak, etc. will constrict the ability to move around within your heart. In other words, lashing out at those close to/around you because they'll never be able to understand the personal hell you've gone through in past relationships caused you to be weighed down making you incapable of moving forward to where you feel stuck. Stuck in the sense of not being able get the zipper to a coat unstuck and no matter how many times you try to open it to unzip those past issue relationships issues you can't, which makes you frustrated, as well as, afraid that you'll never be able to take it off.

For the question can be asked, how many of you are wearing the coat of your own emotions that have metaphorically wrapped you up so tightly it feels as if you're in an invisible straight jacket that is bringing you or has already brought you to the brink of madness? It would be safe to say, many of you have been in a situation where we've struggled to break free from the bitter, resentful feelings you have for someone leaving you so overwhelmed that the madness grows each day whenever thoughts of him or her come to mind. It's a tough situation indeed to let go of something that feels so good because the pain motivates you to hold onto an emotion such as anger. For the hatred you feel for that person who threw away everything..the memories..the feelings...are now considered a source of neverending strength that if it's continually tapped will leave you losing your sanity bit by bit.

In retrospect, you don't want to let your life/love pass you by because once you make the decision to never remove the coats of bad past relationship issues it will stay on for good. You see, no matter how many past issues continue to pile on to where you want to retain that seemingly uncomfortable warmth of comfort, you're always going to feel cold inside. In any case, a person will oftentimes rather keep the torn, ripped up condition of one's mental, behavioral/attitudinal, and emotional state of being than taking time to break in a new one, which takes work on your part. In the end, it's all worth it as you're able to strip away/work through by yourself some tough issues that you have never been able to get past because you either avoided it or you were to scared to talk in depth about it, but when you do you can stand in front of the person you love/care about and say with a smile on your face you can have what's left of me...my heart.

Just A Guy

Someone once said, ~You spend so much time wondering who are you, don't you think? You flounder about searching for your identity when most of the time it is as plain as the nose on your face. You struggle with questions of purpose and need and forget the answers are found mostly inside yourselves.~ If you think about it, it's difficult to figure out who you truly are as we're all searching for answers to our own identity and yet instead of getting answers we find ourselves asking more questions, especially when it comes to matters of the heart. You see, before love metaphorically takes your identity through the proverbial wringer causing it to be broken down to the point where it possibly fades away, you not only know who you are, but you also know the person you potentially want to become.

As said before, you start out knowing not only who you are, but also knowing the person you want to become when it comes to the matters of the heart. However, when you experience times of disappointment/heartbreak you'll seemingly go through an identity crisis in which there is gradual loss of self. For the qualities you initially thought to have made you a different/unique/original individual rather than a carbon copy of what the last guy/girl exuded are essentially crossed off one's internal list, so to speak, leaving you to stand in front of the mirror wondering who is this person staring back at you. It's a tough situation indeed to look at yourself in the mirror and try to see any glimpse of a person who looks at all familiar to you because the possibility of continually experiencing failure in relationships/love may very well lead to inevitably having your entire identity completely fade into obscurity.

Without a doubt, its difficult to establish a real good grasp of who you are when such things as frustration, anger, bitterness, resentment, disappointment, heartbreak,etc. from past potential and/or significant relationships eat away at you, in a manner of speaking, to where you're left asking those around/close to who they think you are placing yourself in a state of unwanted vulnerability. It would be safe to say we've all been in or are in a situation that while in the process of holding on to as much of our identity as we can those around/close to us have shown great concern for our well being whereby we respond with this particular lie...I'm just fine. Think about it, no matter how good you fool others into believing you’re well as can be, the only one you're not fooling is yourself because the truth of it is you don't want to admit/accept the one thing you know deep down inside you are....scared.

Let me ask you this question, has there been in the past or currently a guy/girl who has made you question who you are? Question in the sense of doubting the certain aspects of yourself that define who you are to where you contemplate changing both your integrity and moral character. As a guy, you can become so frustrated at the indecisiveness of what women are looking for that you want to throw away the identity that comfortably suits you and put on an identity that doesn't fit as well. In other words, setting aside the guy who is a gentleman, respectful, takes time to really listen, is there as a friend for a shoulder to cry on, etc. and becomes the guy who I know I will hate every time I look in the mirror. Let me tell you something, there have been plenty of times where I've wanted to cross that line, but to my better judgment I didn't and hopefully it will pay off later down the road...who knows.

In retrospect, for a person like myself who has been searching for answers for the better part of a decade as to my own identity, which has been at times put through the wringer because of past experiences that left me wondering who I am. It's within searching for those answers I essentially know the type of guys I'm not: the sweet talker, the ladies man, the tough guy, the flirt, the bad boy, the heartbreaker, and not even the nice guy. In the end, I'm just a guy who's trying his best to be himself and what has helped me to not completely lose who I am are the Yodasims I've written, which essentially have become a part of my identity, and as scared as I am to one day no longer feel the need to convey my thoughts I know I'll have a good reason as I meet a woman who'll give me the ability to finally see someone absolutely recognizable who at one point was thought to have faded away.

This Christmas

Agnes M. Pharo once said, ~ What is Christmas? It is the tenderness for the past, courage for the present, hope for the future. It is a fervent wish that every cup may overflow with blessings rich and eternal, and that every path may lead to peace.~ Let me ask you this question, what does Christmas mean to you? For it's a question that can conceivably have so many answers because there are countless things to choose from such as getting the gift(s) you've hinted at that you've most wanted or asked for from jolly old Saint Nick. I think we can all agree, presents are one of the many reasons what make Christmas absolutely enjoyable as it turns mature grown up back into giddy immature children. Yet, it's not so much getting the pricey gifts that define Christmas as its more of how God has blessed you with the following gifts: health, friends, and family.

Without a doubt, we're all blessed to have our health and it's a tough situation indeed to try to avoid hurting yourself to the point of breaking bones to getting physically sick for the whole year. You most definitely would applaud those who possibly could accomplish that type of feat as he/she has been able to avoid getting hurt/sick, but there are certain people out there who haven't been so lucky as it goes far beyond just getting the typical cold or flu. Personally speaking, I know a friend of mine who a couple of months ago developed cancer and before ever going into surgery she had this I will kick its butt attitude showing that instead of giving up in order to let it slowly beat her, she going to beat it back whereby exuding a fighting spirit to keep on living, which is considered a blessed precious gift you should never take for granted. If you're wondering, she's doing ok as far as I know.

Essentially, God has blessed each one of us with great friends who can be at times unexpected surprising gifts because you never know what they're going to do or say, but you love them anway.You see, great friends are hard to come by these days, as they are able to personally, emotionally, physically, mentally, financially, and even spiritually lift you up when you're down. You have to admit, when you're blessed with great friends the world seems less stressful unless they're the cause of the stress, whereby leaving you pondering and possibly giving you a reason to exchange them for that so-called new friend smell, but who really wants to take the time to break in new friends? All kidding aside though, if you are fortunate enough to have friends who can put certain aspects of life into perspective such as relationships/love you've been given gifts that keep on giving.

For the question can be asked, how many of you are eternally blessed to have THE most priceless gifts a person can ever be given and that is family. If you think about it, the family dynamic has immensely changed over the years to where it's whatever you personally see it to be and depending on your family situation and how close you are with them you know they love you with all their heart...but I digress. With this being the holiday season, having your whole family together is something special, but for some members of the family who may be overseas in the military they can't be there to share the fun, love, and warmth. It's a sad situation indeed to not have family with you by your side during Christmas, but it would be safe to say that for a wife, mother, brother, sister, etc. the best present they would most like to have is for their spouse, sibling, or relative to be safe at home.

In retrospect, Christmas means so much more than 3 day sales on certain items like video cameras, phones, DVDs, big screen TVs, DVD players, and so on. Its about counting your blessings in which God has been able to keep yourself, as well as, the people you care about safe not just this year, but also past years and possibly future Christmases to come. So, I encourage you to take time to reflect on all the blessings you've been fortunate enough to be given/experienced this past year and pray to God that He continues it on to the new year. In end, I say this to each and every one of you that this christmas count your blessings and know that God has presented you with gifts that are worth more than any ipod, Wii, computer, or whatever you may get on Christmas day, which is a song that reflects this thought by the late Donny Hathaway.

How We Roll

Edward Abbey once said, ~It is the differences between men and women, not the sameness, that creates the tension and the delight.~ Let me ask you this question, have you ever really sat down by yourself or with a group of friends to think about/discuss how men and women are truly different from each other? For it's absolutely amazing the list of things that can be thought up concerning the actions/habits/responses/thought processes men and women have established with each other as separate entities. You see, no matter how absurd, stupid, funny, or totally unbelievable it may sound to the point of thinking it's all made up their absolutely true. Of the many differences there are between men and women the three that I'll be sharing with you are the use of nicknames, going to the bathroom, and decorating a house.

Essentially, what makes the male species different from the female species is the use of nicknames that can range from reasonable to downright strange. It would be safe to say that most women find it not only immature/juvenile to call each other by a nickname, but also don't see the point in doing it because in their mind it's not that difficult to remember their female friend's real name who they generally spend every single day with. Men, on the other hand, will use nicknames despite knowing their buddy's real name and whether it's a friend we've known for years or a friend we just met. We do it because quite frankly it's fun and much easier to remember. Personally speaking, when it comes to my friends/associates past and present they have nicknames such as Biggie, Ducky, Dictionary, Deja, Lumpy, Vegas, Sumo, Buddha, Bladerunner, Crown Royal, Pinto, Blade, Jules, etc.

If you think about it, one of the biggest differences between men and women is going to the bathroom as a group. Looking at it from a guy's perspective, it's perfectly normal for women to go to the bathroom together as they do the following things: check their makeup, fix their hair, talk about guys, etc. Now that is acceptable among the female community unlike the male community who will never ask their buddies to go with them to the bathroom because in our minds it not a place to hang out and socialize as it is primarily seen as a facility to in all intensive purposes get in, do your business, and then get out. Let me tell you something, it is under man law that if any guy asks another guy to go with him/them to the bathroom he is/they're obligated to beat him up....unless he has a good reason such as showing the grand scale of his handiwork, which is considered a great accomplishment.

For the question can be asked, when I say decorating a house what immediately comes to your mind? Without a doubt, men and women have different viewpoints when it comes to making a house feel homey and comfortable to live in. For a woman, decorating a house means having a dining room set, matching furniture, pictures on the wall, curtains, duvet covers, drapes, pillows galore, plates, silverware, kitchen table, chairs, toilet seat covers, towels, guest towels, bath mats, assorted soaps, night stands, things that smell good, and centerpieces that in own her words brighten up the room. For a guy, decorating a house means having the basics such as furniture, a video game system, a tv, wall of DVD's, DVD player, stereo system, a pool table, a bed, a table, posters, and sports memorabilia...possibly signed...hung on the wall to proudly display for others to see.

In retrospect, men and women will always be different when it comes to how we think, as well as, act. For instance, when something like a big entertainment center is going to be put together what do you do first? A woman would first find the instructions, place the important pieces within arm's reach, and then put it together all-the-while reading carefully/thoroughly the instructions. What a guy would do first is look at the instructions, toss it aside, then put all the pieces in a pile, start putting it together, and eventually have it hopefully looking like what is represented on the box. What it comes down to is how certain situations are approached/seen that are seemingly simple and yet it can turn frustratingly complicated inevitably having us asking the same question...why? Hey, who knows why we do it, but we do it anyway because in the end, that's how we roll.