How I Deal(Last Yodaism of 2006)

Elbert Hubbard once said, ~The man who doesn't relax and hoot a few hoots voluntarily, now and then, is in great danger of hooting hoots and standing on his head for edification of the pathologist and trained nurse, a little later on.~ Let me ask you this question, what do yo do to unwind after a stress filled day that had certain people, places, or things test your level of patience to the point you need to something afterwards to gather yourself emotionally, mentally, and/or spiritually. We've all had those days where the look on our face said it all, leaving those around us to proceed with caution knowing their head may be separated from their body, but what stops us is form or type of release that hopefully more or less helps us relax.

Without a doubt, crying is considered to be one of the great stress relievers that tends to help drain whatever you've been building up inside of you. A woman, more so than guys, knows the value of a good cry because it gives her a chance to just let loose and let the tears fall where they may as the frustrations she's going through in life, but more specifically in love give her a reason to open the flood gates, so to speak. The funny thing is, women can be so sympathetic that when one starts crying a sort of domino effect happens to where a whole group a women start balling their eyes out because they feel her pain and yet when it is all said and done everybody feels much better, which is quite possibly one of those mysteries that guys like myself will always be amazed at.

Oftentimes, when times of stress get to you, laughing is what's sorely needed as it's considered the best medicine to help what's been ailing you. Each of us has someone or something we go to in order to turn our frown upside down and without question it's what the doctor ordered, in a manner of speaking. For some people, it's their best friend who can automatically make them laugh, for others it's a certain favorite comedic movie that even though you've seen countless times to where those around you are annoyed it never grows old for you, or for people like myself it's a television show such as Scrubs, which gets me laughing so hard that I not only snort, but also almost puke my guts out because of the show's sarcastic tone and goofball, wacky antics.

Essentially, when crying and laughing aren't the ways you want to release the build up of tension some type of sports, recreational or not, uses one's aggression to his or her advantage as you can initially stay both physically fit for your own health and maintain your sanity that would have slipped away completely. Anyways, such sports that help gradually sweat the stress right out of your body are playing a game of basketball, football, hockey, baseball, soccer, rugby, tennis, swimming, etc. For those who are into recreational sports games like bowling, lifting weights, frolf(frisbee golf), paintball, running, exercising, ping pong, rock climbing, etc. can truly be therapeutic as you harness the emotions of your feeling and turn into focused energy.

In retrospect, there are so many other ways to release the stress related tensions of the day or week such as writing, drawing, singing, dancing, listening to music, yoga, tai chi, martial arts, cooking, drinking doing the horizontal mambo, or taking a substance deemed illegal unless you are cleared medically to take it for let's say glaucoma. Thinking about it, whatever works for you to get you from not committing mass homicide on any innocent bystander who is standing next, near, or around you is what you should stick with unless it's illegal. Personally speaking, I play video games, draw, watch tv, take a drive, listen to music, go to the movies, hang with friends, and of course write to relax. In the end, when it comes to the stress of the day/week that's how I deal and now I ask you, how do you deal?

My Wish

Someone once said, ~The deepest wishes of the heart find expression in secret prayers.~ On this holiday season, countless adults and kids all over the world are both praying and wishing for gifts that will be found under the Christmas tree put under there by jolly old Saint Nick. Its those particular gifts that hopefully may have been given with a lot of thought, time, and effort to truly show how much love, as well as, care was put into the selection of the gift(s) in question. If you think about it though, the best gift you can possibly ever receive isn't something found under the Christmas tree to unwrap, but rather its found in a person's heart as he or she prays that you hope to receive what is truly most important in not only life, but also in love as well.

Let me ask you this question, what is that one big dream you have been praying for to quite possibly come true for you sooner or later in life? I think for every person, its getting a job that is both enjoyable and challenging to the point where you set a goal for yourself in order to achieve what you set out in your heart to do, which inevitably becomes an incentive to reach for. Unfortunately, obstacles can stand in your way leaving you frustrated, angry, and ready to throw in the towel to where your dream you've envisioned to come to fruition not only grows increasingly smaller, but also gets way out of reach. For the most part, you just have to keep working hard, reach within yourself, and never give up on going after your dream no matter how big or rediculous it may seem.

Without a doubt, we all pray for the worries that tend to overwhelm us to be small and not so big that it becomes an annoying burden carried on our shoulders. What it comes down to are the choices we make in life that determine our destiny for the future, which can either open certain doors of opportunity or close them depending on how wise the choices are. Hey, mistakes can be made and regrets can eat away at us if we continue to look back on them, but if you want to move forward with the future you have to let go of past, regretful worries and learn from those mistakes. Essentially, you look to God's grace as you leave it all in His hands because the less you have to worry about in your life the happier you and others around you are.

For the question can be asked of you, do you personally have someone special to spend your days with or miss who makes life just a little more enjoyable, especially during this holiday season? I think every person would agree that we all want the same thing when it comes to matters of the heart because there's a certain romantic atmosphere when Christmas rolls around that your heart begins to feel incomplete. For you witness those around share intimate, unforgettable moments as two people not only say so much to each other without even saying a word, but you also see the warmth and love within each other's eyes, which is something we all want to experience with someone who you pray to God every single day for being absolutely lucky to be with this person.

In retrospect, Christmas is a time where you think about others in an unselfish way and not of yourself. Although we can't send out presents to everybody, sending out our heartfelt prayers is the best gift anyone can do because it shows how much people really care, which can leave you with a good feeling inside. It's through our prayer filled wishes to the people we not only care about such as our friends, family, that special someone in your life, and the troops in the Middle East, but to all those who are less fortunate that they receive what everyone else hopes to receive. In the end, I say to my friends, family, and to that someone special who I'm thinking about, my wish for you is that your dreams stay big, your worries stay small, and know that someone loves you with all his heart and soul, which is a song by the best selling artists across all genres of music of 2006 Rascal Flatts.

Our Voices Heard

Pete Dominici once said, ~Child abuse continues to be a significant problem in the United States. It was estimated that in 2001, 903,000 children were the victimes of child abuse or neglect. Child abuse is a crime perpetrated on the innocent and the defenseless.~ Thinking about it, its not too often that a particular topic gets me worked up, but when that topic is about child abuse I not only take it very seriously, but also take it personally as well. Why? Working with kids for the past decade, you see and hear countless stories of how kids are emotionally, physically, and even sexually abused that you can't help but feel separately or altogether at once emotions such as anger and disgust it makes you not only speechless, but also sick to your stomach just thinking about it.

Without a doubt, when a child is physically abused their spirit can be broken to the point where they are just a shell of their former self. They can be at times quiet to where they're emotionally and socially closed off depending on how long, as well as, the extent of the type of abuse in question. When or if that abuse turns sexual in nature it's not just they're spirit that is broken, its also their innocence is broken or should I say taken to the point that he or she may quite possibly be taken advantage of in a future relationship. It's a sad situation indeed when a child experiences abuse, whether it be emotional, physical, and/or sexual, that it leaves him or her with deep psychological and traumatic scars to deal with when one gets older.

Oftentimes, it's those same deep and psychological and traumatic scars a child experiences can be blocked out of his or her memory for years until something or someone triggers it bringing back to the surface all the emotions that were unfortunately repressed over time. Countless stories can be told of adults who were abused as kids not being able to hold a long lasting, stable relationship because the abuse that he or she suffered took all the love in one's heart and turned it into repressed anger, whereby making him or her become emotionally distant when getting closer to someone who one may be falling for. Essentially, the four key words to keep repeating to any abused child or an adult who was a child from an abusive home is, it's not your fault.

For those who know me, have gotten to know me, or just getting to know me, I tend to joke around about how "my kids" at work make me so crazy that I want to strangle or completely knock them out, but the fact of the matter is that I love them to death. You see, it takes a big person to hurt a child just because they make you angry, but it takes an even bigger person to walk away and let that anger be taken out on something else such as a punching bag. Let me tell you something, I'm pretty much an easy going kind of guy who jokes around and likes a good laugh, but have even a mere thought about harming any of "my kids" in any way, then you'll see a side of me that not even my closest friends have never seen or want to see and trust me when I say, it won't be anything to joke or laugh about.

About a week ago, I noticed marks on a child's arm to where I immediately brought it to the attention of my boss and in turn she brought it to the attention of the proper authorities. Though I can't talk about the specifics of that particular situation, I can say that the child is okay and an arrest was made. The one question I've been asked is do I feel like a hero and to be quite honest I don't because I was trained to do a job that involves keeping an observant eye on them to spot anything that may not be quite right. In any case, kids who go through abuse are usually scared to speak out because they think that nobody will listen to what they have to say. In the end, kids of abuse have a voice and collectively they're screaming out loud, we want our voices heard, but the question remains are you going to listen to their cries of help?

Tu Amor

Someone once said, ~Love has a language of its own. A voice that goes from heart to heart. Whose mystic tone love only knows.~ Without a doubt, there are many different ways that a person can express how he or she feels about someone. Whether or not that person is able to understand/interpret what one is trying to say is basically left up to the decision of him or her to only accept it with open arms, but also allow it to personally and emotionally touch his or her heart. At some point, we've all expressed or are expressing how we feel towards a particular someone in our own way and depending on if he or she got or is getting what one's saying is primarily determined by how loud of an impact you want to make on what you love/care about.

Essentially, there are people out there who are considered the strong silent type that make an impact without technically saying a word. It's these types of people who sometimes have trouble expressing themselves verbally to someone who they are interested in and inevitably write down what he or she is unable to say because of either the freeze factor or being absolutely tongue tied when around him or her. In a sense, people can truly feel, as well as, be metaphorically blown away by the words that come from one's heart and soul that can cause a person to cry because it was so heartfelt. Let me tell you something, I honestly don't know how powerful the words I express are until someone shares with me how it has affected them either personally, emotionally, and/or spiritually.

For those who are musically talented, expressing their feelings for a particular someone in a song is considered one of the romantic things a person can possibly do for another human being. A woman, more than anything, would not only be absolutely flattered, but also touched if a guy took the time to think, write lyrics down on paper, and then be able to sing them to her with a possibility of some type of instrument in hand. Countless stories can be told of a man serenading the woman he loves/cares about, even though he may not be able to sing on key, which doesn't stop him from giving it his all with his heart and soul. The so-called payoff is hopefully seeing a glowing smile on her face that gives him a reason why he fell in love with her in the first place.

Let me ask you this question, what is your native language and how would you put into words the feelings you wanted to express to someone you love/care about? As we all know, Americans in the United States express love by saying the wordsI love you while people in the country of France, known for being the language of love, say Je t'aime. Now if you're Irish taim i' ngra leat is what you want to express to the one who bring all the luck to your heart. Ti voglio bene is an expression an Italian says to the one he or she loves and when it comes to my peeps, the flipinos, the words mahal kita are expressed towards a particular pinay or pinoy of whom one is truly in love with. Last but certainly not the least is Te quiero, which is expressed by those who have that Spanish latin fire within their heart.

In retrospect, love always has a way to get its voice heard even though you may not know its actually being heard as you want to get off your chest what you want a particular someone to know/hear. Thinking about it, one of the greatest ways to show how much you care about someone is writing it on paper, putting it into song lyrics, and speaking it in one's native language. Of the many different languages that are spoken, Spanish seems to be considered one of the most passionate and quite frankly many of us can probably either speak it or know a little bit of it to say something that hopefully makes sense. So in end, I say this: Tu amor, el corazon, y su alma que usted compartio conmigo significa el mundo a mi y en el regreso yo comparto para siempre mi armor, el carazon, y mi alma con usted, and it's a song that somewhat reflects this thought by the Latin group known as Rebelde a.k.a RBD.

It Doesn't Matter

Someone once said, ~Sometimes I wonder what you think of me...or if you do at all.~ Whether we want to admit it or not, we all have an ego that craves the notoriety of wanting to know how others think, see, and/or feel about us especially when it pertains to matters of the heart. If you think about it, we sometimes don't care about the opinions of people who we love/care about such as our friends and family because quite frankly they can be considered judgemental towards us to the point where a thick skin of armor develops causing us to not really be bothered by what they say. Yet, for some reason someone comes along who is able to the peirce one's thick armor to where you start caring about what he or she thinks about you that it actually bothers you, in a good way of course.

Essentially, when ego gets involved in matters of the heart you don't want to run the risk of having too little or too much of it. What do I mean? It inevitably comes down to a person's self confidence that can determine either a possibly potential relationship forming or a relationship that is unfortunately going anywhere. You see a lack of self confidence can have a person become someone who is so timid, shy, scared, and not able to think for one's self that your peers wonder if you have any backbone at all. Now too much self confidence will have that certain someone of interest be turned off by how much of an arrogant, self absorbed person he or she can be, which most definitely ruins any chance of making any type of heart to heart connection whatsoever.

Without a doubt, we all want to look for a person that has a well balanced ego with the ability to keep it in check at all times because no matter how good things are going with a certain someone, there will be a situation where something said/done will cause you to have him or her to be thrown off one's high horse, in a manner of speaking. For the most part, you want to him or her to be their natural self without putting up of front, which is absolutely appealing because the fact of the matter is in this day and age you don't find too many men or women who are truly for real that you can be around and not consider slapping due to how arrogant they are. However the question remains, do you know someone who, as far as you know, is the real deal and not some arrogant s.o.b. or diva?

Personally speaking, do I really care what your opinions of me are when it concerns the Yodaisms that deal with relationships that I either send/post for you to read even though I have never been in a relationship myself? To be perfectly honest, I do care to a certain extent because it's you guys who gave your own feedback to how it relates to you in a way that it has been informative, inspiring, touching, heartfelt, and funny, which gives me somewhat of an ego boost, but not a lot. It's the feedback that I've received over the years that I’ve earned the respect of my peers, whether they agreed or disagreed with what I wrote. Its through the respect from my peers, that they've seemingly given me the title of mini-Dr. Phil, which is a title that I humbly accept and trust me it hasn't gone to my head.

In retrospect, your ego and heart will always clash, but it takes a special person who is able to put aside one's ego for someone special to where it begins to strips away his or her thick skin of armor leaving one wide open to being hurt, but you're willing to risk it as you put your heart on the line, so to speak. It can be a tough situation indeed to be in as you turn to your friends and possibly members of your own family for opinions on the best course of action to take, if you take it. Ultimately, at the end of the day it doesn't matter what your friends, family, or even that certain someone who is interested in you thinks because in the end, it's what you alone think that matters as you put your ego aside and decide with both your heart, as well as, God's guidance if that person is right for you.

Your Everything

Someone once said, ~I have you. A lover and a friend. You are everything I need. You are the sun, the air I breathe. Without you, life wouldn't be the same. Please don't ever go away. And if you go, then don't forget to take me with you.~ As a guy, there comes a point in life where you meet someone who is everything you ever wanted in a woman. However, you oftentimes wonder what you can possibly ever give/offer her so you start asking yourself if you're able to give her everything she's been looking for and wanting in a guy. Even though there aren't any doubts whatsoever concerning everything she has given you, there are doubts as to whether or not one can live up to those expectations of giving/offering everything to her what a past relationship or past relationships failed to do.

In some aspect, every woman is looking for and wants a guy who can be her very own therapist that she can turn to in order to not only have her problems heard, but also have them possibly solved as well. Primarily, what a woman wants is a guy who will be able to listen to what has been bothering her and hopefully he can reciprocate by giving back real feedback. When I say real feedback, I mean a response that involves giving his open, honest opinion that is well thought out and not a response that merits a dumbfounded look of silence or a shrug of the shoulders with the words I don't know added. It's when a guy is able to give/offer a woman peace of mind, he is truly deserving of being paid in full with hugs and kisses.

Without a doubt, every woman looks for/wants a guy who can give/offer the qualities of not just one superhero, but several different ones. For he exudes the fun, laughter, and excitement of Spider-Man with the caring sensitivity of Peter Parker. He has the no nonsense attitude and quiet smoothness of Batman with a hint of arrogant self-confidence of Bruce Wayne. The strength and love of Superman with the boyish charm of Clark Kent. The age defying timelessness that's unforgettable of Wolverine with the bad boy mentality women tend to be attracted to. Add the moral character and intellect of Beast, the heart and determination of the Hulk, and the wisdom and leadership of Professor X and ultimately what a woman gets, as well as, sees is a person who is more than just a 1 dimensional character, so to speak.

Let me ask you this question ladies, how high on the scale of importance for you to have a guy share and show with you his more romantic Don Juan side? It's probably near the top or at the top of the list of things that most definitely pleases, excites, and surprises her when it involves showing a side of ourselves that tends to not be seen. Why? Essentially, it threatens our masculinity to where we try suppress it, but a woman has the ability to see through the tough guy exterior to where she has that uncanny ability to bring out our softer, affectionate side. Let me tell you something, being able to get in touch with your romantic side is nothing to be ashamed of as it gives/offers women the chance to see firsthand how romance is not dead, but rather is being kept alive by hopeless romantics like myself.

In retrospect, women more than anything would love to have a guy that is considered, in their minds, a jack of all trades. Its a guy who hopefully gives/offers not only the above mentioned, but also the following things as well: A chef who can cook her a gourmet meal from scratch. A spiritual guide who is her compass when she gets lost both personally and emotionally. A massage therapist who can rub the aches and pains of the day that stress her out. Thinking about it, that's just the tip of the iceberg as there's more that a woman thinks a guy possibly can give/offer, but unfortunately the list is too long to mention for this particular thought. In the end, trust me ladies when I say that there is a guy out there for you who wants to be, will at least try to be, or is your everything, which is a song by the top male country music vocalist winner of 2006 Keith Urban.

Out of the Shadows

Alexander Smith once said, ~ We bury love; Forgetfulness grows over it like grass: That is a thing to weep for, not the dead.~ In some aspect, when you face times of utter heartbreak you feel as if your standing over your very own grave watching a casket slowly being lowered six feet under. It’s within that casket, you'll not only find your heart, but you'll also find the essence of who you once were before the pain of love slowly extinguished the bright light of hope and love that kept you fighting to live each day, which can most certainly be seen by the look in your eyes. Let me ask you this question, how many of you are metaphorically standing over the grave of who you once were and over time have you completely forgotten, as well as, left that person behind for good?

If you think about it, when it comes to the atmosphere of a funeral that you are, in a way, saying goodbye to your heart, as well as, the essence of your former self it's usually not a forecast that calls for warm, sunny, clear skies. More often than not, the weather can be at times cold, dark, rainy, and windy, which can be considered an uncomfortable and sad experience to be a part of. Essentially, you can feel that same cold, dark, rainy, and windy weather brewing within yourself to the point where you're getting lost in the storm of not only your emotions but also your feelings as well. It's truly a sad situation indeed for certain people who are stuck in the storm of their own emotions and feelings to where they have given up on ever seeing the light over the horizon, in a manner of speaking.

Without a doubt, it's a scary situation indeed for any person to come face to face with the mortality of one's own heart, so to speak, when it pertains to the loss of love within it. For it's the life force that keeps hope in love alive and beating, but unfortunately that life force can fade when you suffer times of personal heartbreak that run deep into the very core of your soul. The warmth of love that one once felt and embraced that exuded a familiar sign of an energetic, happy, smile has been replaced by the cold, dreary, emptiness that exudes anger, bitterness, and hate in your heart. In a sense, the same anger, bitterness, and hate is considered an eerie representation of the dirt being shoveled into your grave as it slowly covers it in complete darkness.

For the question can be asked to those who have suffered great pain and heartbreak in the past, how much dirt is currently covering up the coffin that holds both your heart and the essence of your former self? For the most part, it really depends on the length of time a person has been holding on to the pain of anger, bitterness, and hate that consequently determines a grave that either is in the process of being covered or one that is already covered to where a tombstone is placed with the name and date inscribed on it. Let me tell you something, there can still be hope in reviving love in their heart and bringing back the essence of their former self, but for the others it may possibly be too late for him or her to have their heart and essence of who they once were to ever be brought back to life.

In retrospect, there comes a point that while standing at your own metaphorical gravesite, the grim reaper waits patiently beside you for both your heart and the essence of your former self to pass away completely. For the pain and heartbreak is considered torture to where a person will never be able to rest in peace, which many people have experienced or are experiencing now. However, if there is hope that love is still in your heart and a recognizable essence is still showing signs of a faint glimmer then you gotta keep fighting to not let yourself slip away into hands of the dark, chilling, hands of the grim reaper. In the end, it's never too late to bring out of the shadows what you once thought died inside you and bring it back to life with the help of someone who you consider your very own angel of light.

Feel The Burn

George Sheehan once said, ~There are as many reasons for running as there are days in the year, years in my life. But mostly I run because I am an animal and a child, an artist and a saint. So, too, are you. Find your own play, your own self-renewing compulsion, and you will become the person you are meant to be.~ Without a doubt, there is a general consensus among certain people that running is considered not only one of the many ways to be physically fit, but it is also said to be an absolute adrenaline rush. Whether or not you simply do it for fun or just do it for your own health and well being or both it keeps your blood pumping. Let me ask you this question, as a kid were you the type of person who just enjoyed running and do you still run even to this day?

If you think about it, as little kids we run a lot not for the reasons of physical fitness, but because we had so much sugar running through our system that we had to burn off the energetic high from eating candy such as pixie stix back in the day. For it wasn't just the candy that did it, it was also the cereal as well that made running outside the best alternative than running inside for the expressed purpose of not getting anything valuable broken, which was a decision made by one's own parents. It's truly amazing how many of us weren't seriously injured as we ran ourselves silly to the point of being nearly knocked out by running into certain household furniture and yet, we were able to be unphased, which proves my theory that kids are invincible when hopped up on endless amounts of sugar.

It would be safe to say that as little kids we challenged or should I say dared other kids to race to see who was the fastest either on the school playgrounds or in our own neighborhood. When in doubt, the words that would inevitably spark an impromptu race are I'm faster than you and then what follows is a lot of trash talking, which mainly consisted of insults that hardly made any sense at all. Depending on how cocky you were and your win/loss it most definitely would psyche out other kids. For it was the thrill of competition in the game that pitted friend vs. friend and if I could borrow a line from former WWE wrestler Brett "The Hitman" Hart, you totally wanted to be the best there is, the best there was, and the best there ever will be.

Essentially, there comes a point, where one's zeal for running as a kid is gradually lost because of Father Time catching up to you. The reality of it is the human body won't work like it used and no matter how much we want to relive our misspent youth, life will remind you that its just not going to happen. Working in the asylum, you realize you can longer keep up with the younger kids when you play a game of basketball as you run down the court like you used to because after several minutes you feel as if you are going to suffer a heart attack and die. I'm not saying that I'm out of shape, but what I'm saying is that I have to accept the fact I'm no longer that young 19 year old kid who had an endless amount of energy to chase and guard whoever had the basketball in their hands.

Jimmy Carter said, ~Everyone who run knows that its most important value is in removing tension and allowing a release from whatever other cares the day may bring.~ In retrospect, running gives you a chance to relieve the stress of anger, frustration, sadness, etc. you may be encountering during the day or week. Oftentimes you can become so focused in running you put yourself into that proverbial zone to where you unknowingly push yourself to the limit or beyond what you're capable of doing in order to achieve something that you've deemed it a personal best. In the end, I tip my hat to those of you that consistently go out, run and feel the burn every day, which truly inspires me to be right there alongside with you...I'll be driving in a golf cart of course...but I'll be there with you nonetheless.

The Small Stuff

Matt Keopke once said, ~ There's a lot of things to think about but not a lot of things to worry about.~ Without a doubt, there's not a day that goes by that each of us are thinking about something and/or someone. Who am I? What am I going to eat? Where will I find a good job? When will I find the right person and get married? Why is the sky blue? How much is the price of gas going to go up or is it going to stay considerably low? Essentially, thinking is part of who we all are as human beings as certain little thoughts cross our mind that have happened in the past, is happening now in the present, or may happen in the future to us that the so called little things we think of become something big to worry about, which isn't good for one's health and well being whatsoever.

Let me ask you this question, what is the one of the things that we tend to generally think about when it concerns our finances? If you said money, you are correct because as individuals sometimes place ourselves in a tight situation by buying things we don't generally need that can literally cost you an arm and a leg. For its one's particular and probably expensive expenditure that inevitably has you tightening your belt, so to speak, to the point a bit of worry sets in as you're looking at the bills on the table. So why do we buy things that we may or may not regret later down the road? What it primarily comes down to is our vanity and lust for the things that will supposedly make us not only look good, but also feel good as well.

When it comes to being a parent, you're always thinking about the safety and well being of your kids to where it will drive you nuts. There are countless thoughts that run through a parent's mind when its about one's own kid(s) such as: Will he/she stay away from drugs? Is he/she having sex? Is he/she getting a great education? Will he/she marry the right person? If you are a parent or are going to be a parent, those thoughts and others like it can not only worry you, but they can also scare you to death because you can't stop them from growing up and keep them the age you want them to be. For the most part, all a parent can ever do is try to teach and instill in them Godly values in hopes they grow up to be responsible enough to make the right decisions for the sake of their own future.

For the question can be asked, how many of you love someone or fall in love with someone? I think we would all be in agreement that love is always in our thoughts, which are stored within your heart for someone who is considered truly special in your eyes. Yet, there comes a point where you start wondering about certain things and women, more so than guys, ask a lot of questions within their own mind when it involves a guy who she may be potentially in love with or is absolutely in love with. Questions such as: Will I always be able to trust him? Will he always treat me with respect? Will he always be there whenever I need him even without me asking? Will he never hurt me? It’s questions like these, as well as, many more that can make a woman totally freak out that she can and will start crying.

In retrospect, the thoughts we tend to focus on that make us worried seem to have an oftentimes overwhelming control over us. In some aspect, you can become a totally neurotic person who constantly worries about every single thing, somewhat like actor/director/writer Woody Allen. In any case, we've all been in or in a situation now where something or someone has you so wound up that you either feel agitated, angry, nervous, edgy, or all the above that you start sweating because of the stress it's personally putting you through. In the end, don't sweat the small stuff because in the whole scheme of things God knows all your big worries that started off as small simple thoughts and be rest assured He is taking care of each and every one of them.

More Than You Bargained For

Michael Star once said, ~True love is not a bargain made and not a thing to deal or trade. For love's a gift that has no strings as free as songs the bluebird sings.~ In some aspect, love or true love for that matter can have a person feel as if he or she is "shopping" around for the greatest deal one can ever imagine when it pertains to the happiness of one's own heart. However, even though money and/or credit cards aren't being used one can be, in some ways, paying the price as you can inevitably get ripped off because of a so-called bad deal that left your heart penniless, so to speak. Essentially, we all want the same thing when it comes to our heart and that is to find/meet someone who is absolutely reliable, but the question remains how long are you willing to wait for him or her to come along?

If you think about it, when it comes to "shopping" around for that great deal, a person can oftentimes get into the habit of haggling. Haggling not with the particular guy or girl of interest, but instead haggling with one's self as he or she tries to figure out what not only does or doesn't work for them, but also peaks their own interests. Women, more so than guys, tend to do the most haggling with themselves as they go through their seemingly long and yet a sometimes confusing list, which can constantly change at any point. For the most part, whether you're a man or a woman, you don't want to end up short changing yourself by making the wrong decisions to where it costs you to lose what you've been saving in your heart for someone who is truly special.

Without a doubt, every person wants to sign that solid, iron clad lifetime guarantee that could quite possibly ensure one's own happiness. It's a "contract" in which you expect to be covered by any damages that may occur to your very own heart, but as we all know it is never really reliable at times. Why? What it comes down to is the sneaky fine print that makes one's so-called lifetime guaranteed contract null and void to where it can slap you hard in the face by saying it's not responsible for any emotional damage one may suffer because of heartbreak. Let me tell you something, always be careful of the sneaky fine print because even though you can replace/fix something that is material, you can't replace your broken heart, which is considered absolutely priceless.

Let me ask you this question, are you looking for quality or quantity in someone out there who is considered to be a deal of lifetime that will most certainly benefit your heart for years to come. In other words, are your interests geared more towards the qualities that exude from the inside out or are you more interested in the flash of the outside qualities, as well as, how much material wealth he or she possesses? Personally speaking, I'm more interested by the quality than by the highly overrated quantity and I think every person would agree with me when I say being with someone who will love you for what you have in your heart makes you a happier person than someone who just loves you for what you have in your wallet don't you think?

In retrospect, whenever a great deal comes along that simply touches your heart there's always that little voice in the back of your head that asks if there's a catch attached to it. For a certain number of people, experience has unfortunately taught them that there's always a catch, which has ended up hurting them even more to the point where they have the inability to trust someone who may be falling in love with him or her. Ultimately, you have to realize love is a gift from God that can't ever be bargained with and rest assured there are no strings attached. In the end, when you meet/find someone that gives you everything you can ever possibly imagine within your heart and then some, it just amazes you because what you get from him or her is more than you bargained for.

In Your Eyes

David Levesque once said, ~You know you are in love when you see the world in her eyes, and her everywhere in the world.~ For any guy, there's just something about a woman's eyes that draws us in to where we can simply get lost in them as countless stories can most certainly be told of what she has not only seen, but also experienced as well from behind two metaphorical glass windows. In some aspect, it's within a woman's eyes that deeply reflect what is in her heart, which can be difficult at times to see if a guy isn't looking hard enough. However, if he takes the time in doing so he will truly get a better understanding of what she has been through when it comes to being hurt in the past to the point where love is shown from her eyes and reflects into his own.

Let me ask you this question ladies, how bright is the hope of love or true love for that matter that shines in your very own heart? Thinking about it, a woman can start out with a beaming hope in her heart that just shines through from her eyes giving off a seemingly bright glow when it comes to experiencing being in love. Unfortunately, that bright glow in her eyes can grow from gradually dimming to completely dark from suffering times of heartbreak leaving not only the guy with the inability to see her heart, but also the woman as well. It's a sad situation indeed when there isn't any life behind those eyes because the light in her heart has grown dark as if the love she feels from within her heart and soul is about to die out or already has died out.

Oftentimes, when there is an absence of light within a woman's heart there is also a lack of warmth, which leaves her with a cold feeling inside. As a guy, you can sometimes pick up on a certain decrease in temperature as there is coldness in the air when a woman speaks of an unmemorable past relationship. It's the initial lack of sharing/giving of the warmth of affection due in part of a guy or guys in her past that has left her with somewhat of any icy barrier around her heart and when a guy comes along who is genuinely honest reaches out with his own heart he receives a case of frostbite, so to speak. Though it hurts, it doesn't stop him from showing, as well as, sharing the light and warmth from within his own heart that it helps to bring back signs of light and warmth in hers.

Essentially, the light and warmth of hope that is found in love is a feeling so real that every woman should experience it with a guy who gives her the strength to face each day with a new zeal. Yet, there is a part of her that doesn't want to feel something so real that it leaves her scared out of her mind to where she wants to run away, but hopefully doesn't. For the light and warmth shown from a genuinely honest guy gives a woman a chance to set aside her own fears/anger and go with what her instincts within her heart are telling her. I think any woman would agree that when you find someone who is able to bring back something they haven't experienced in quite some time because of heartbreak, and that is a bright, warm smile not only on their face, but also in their heart as well.

Kristen Kappel said, ~Love is when you look into someone's eyes and see everything you need.~ In retrospect, there comes a point where a guy like myself asks if love is reflected in my own eyes for a woman who I genuinely like and my answer is yes, but it's a love of respect and appreciation. I have utmost respect for her as a woman who is absolutely tough when it comes to experiencing past heartbreak and a deep appreciation for her friendship she has been able to share with me. In the end, I say to her that whether you know it or not, you unknowingly bring light, as well as, warmth to not only my world, but also others around you, which is felt from your heart and is seen from in your eyes, which is a song by Peter Gabriel from the movie Say Anything.