The Right Stuff

Victor Frankle once said, ~A man who becomes conscious of the responsibilities he bears towards a human being who affectionately waits for him, or to an unfinished work, will never be able to throw away his life. He knows the "why" for existence, and will be able to bear almost any how.~ For the past decade my job has been about the safety, well being, teaching, guiding, molding, character building, expressing positive reinforcement, and growth of kids, which has been a responsibility I chose even though I think it chose me. In any case, there comes a point where an unsure question begins to nag at you even though friends, family, and your peers already know the answer to it. So, the question I have to ask myself is, do I have the abilities/qualities to be a great dad someday?

If you think about it, when you become a parent you are automatically considered an authority figure who has the so-called power to say or do what feels necessary to look out for their own best interests. Unfortunately, looking after their own best interests can cause friction as they get older to where heated arguments are exchanged, which really never changes in the game called parenting. Working in the asylum, I've encountered heated friction with "my kids" both past and present because of looking out for their own best interests in mind. However, its those same kids who you angrily butted heads with are the ones you end up laughing with as you are playing a game of pool, which is one of many aspects of parenting one will experience or already is experiencing.

Without a doubt, when it comes to being a parent you exude a tremendous amount of patience dealing with their own child/children on a daily basis. Now imagine dealing with countless, hyperactive kids for 5 days a week, 5 hours per day, which doesn't include summer camp hours of 5 days a week, 8 hours per day with an army full of kids who make you want to rip your own hair out at times. Essentially, you spend countless hours in a sort of controlled chaos environment where kids will push your patience close or beyond its breaking point and yet its those same kids who know when to back off because they've learned to respect how far they can take you without having to be strangled to death, which hasn't happened to me yet even though I've come close to it.

For the question can be asked, if you're a parent how would you react to seeing or hearing that your own child got hurt? The well experienced parent would absolutely remain calm as possible not only for his or her own sake, but also for the child's sake as well. Why? If that scared child sees you freaking out that child will freak out also and inevitably you have two people freaking out. For the most part, you have to keep a level head about you and by doing that you think more clearly instead of running in all crazy as if you're a chicken with its head cut off. Let me tell you something, there have been countless times in the past where I was freaking out inside because a child either broke his arm or suffered a deep gash in the forehead, but I was able to be calm on the outside for the sake of the child.

About 2 weeks ago, my godson was born and several days later I was able to hold him in my arms for the very first time. While holding Caleb Bruce Jones in my arms, I felt like a proud dad and all the past experience working with kids over the past 10 years culminated into thinking to myself that this somehow just feels right. For an hour, he didn't make a sound and the only noise he did make was when he needed to be changed, which was a responsibility I gave over to the mother. Hey, it's all about baby steps and I'll do it eventually. In the end, my unsure question that kept nagging at me was answered when one of my friends/peers looked me in the eyes and told me that I was a natural who possessed all the right stuff to be an awesomely great dad someday.

Against All Odds

Rabindranath Tagore once said, ~Life's fulfillment finds constant obstacles in its path, but those are necessary for the side of its advance. The stream is saved from the sluggishness of its current by the perpetual opposition of the soul through which it must cut its way. The spirit of flight belongs to the genius of life.~ Without a doubt, there are trials and tribulations each of us go through in which our very own character is tested. For its our character that can be stretched to the limit when pressures of life and love tend to not only weigh you down, but also seem to beat you down as well, in a manner of speaking. When it comes to going through trials and tribulations of your own, they tend to affect you in 3 ways: emotionally, physically, and spiritually.

Let me ask you this question, how long have you been in a significant relationship with your other half? The reason I am asking is that I think you, as well as, many other people out there would agree that being in a relationship such as marriage can most definitely take its toll on you emotionally. It can be emotionally draining to experience the highs and lows that can be at times a heavy burden to where it can literally make you sick to your stomach as if you were riding on a rollercoaster, which is not a good thing when it concerns a seemingly happy relationship experiencing unfortunate problems. It's a sad situation indeed to imagine how mentally grueling it can be for any person to go through a plethora of emotions all at once that you just want them to go away in order to have peace within your own mind.

Oftentimes, when it comes to going through difficulties in a marriage, it can not only affect you emotionally, but it can also affect you physically as well, especially if there are kids involved. It takes a lot of inner strength to hold yourself together all-the-while trying to keep a smile on your face for the sake of your kids so they won't pick on the sadness, which will have them sympathize with you in their own way right alongside with you. From a parent's perspective, they're the rock for their kids who they can always come to when they start to stumble and yet as a parent you have to rely on that reserve strength to get you through those difficult times. Times in which you just want to give up because you're tired, but what keeps you going is the unconditional love you have for them and they for you.

Essentially, there comes a point where the emotional and physical battles you've been going through inevitably becomes a spiritual battle. A battle in which you're tested on how much faith you have when individual aspects of one's marriage are shaken up all at once to where its a struggle to keep your sanity intact. When times of trouble occur in a relationship you can place your faith in certain areas of life like friends and family to get you through to possibly try to fix the problem(s), but what tends to happen is the problem(s)go from bad to worse. Faith fades if you're looking in all the wrong places because the best place to look and find a solace calm within yourself from all the chaos happening around you is through prayer with God as He will help you through the most toughest of times.

In retrospect, marriage is about facing constant seen or unseen obstacles and working hard to be able to get through them as a team. Men and women should know by now that it's hard to find/meet someone who will stick with you for the long haul as he or she has gotten to know you...the real you... and has been able to tolerate all the stupid, annoying things that would have any other person leave in an instant. Ultimately, you root for the couples who you consider both friends, as well as, family and hope they continue on their marital journey together for years to come. In the end, when it comes to life and love in the area of marriage the odds will always be stacked against you, but it's against all odds through blood, sweat, tears, hard work, and faith in God that hopefully things work out for the better.

Inside Out

Someone once said, ~Deep down we have the qualities of clarity, awareness, sensitivity, warmth and love, but we have little idea at the outset just how deep and vast those qualities can be.~ Let me ask you this question, when it comes to that special someone in your life, could you be able to list the qualities you feel in love with over time? Love or true love for that matter can have a person look deep within one's heart and soul for the qualities that truly show how special someone is. It's those qualities that aren't seen right away as they are considered hidden even though they're in plain view to see. Essentially, it takes time and patience to see those hidden qualities and when you do eventually see them, it brings an even bigger smile to your face.

Without a doubt, there have been men out there and women as well who made the shallow mistake of not looking deep enough for the qualities that truly matter in a relationship. For its all too obvious physical attraction that can most certainly get the better of a person as one can immediately stop digging, so to speak, to find out what makes him or her tick. Instead, he or she stays on the surface where it's safe as that person chooses to avoid finding out what lies beneath the alluring exterior because if at any point an excavation begins one may not like what he or she finds. What it comes down to is not wanting to ruin/break up the seemingly shallow fantasy in one's mind that when your eyes are truly opened that beautiful fantasy becomes an ugly reality.

In any case, when a person does take the time to go beyond the surface you'll begin to see, as well as, understand the qualities that make you aware of how vulnerable and sensitive a person can be. Women, more so than men, carry around that vulnerable sensitivity side to them 24/7 when it pertains to having their emotional needs met, which can be scary insecurity to have for some, most, or all women. As a guy, I've learned that no matter how old a woman is, whether she's 16 or 66, her insecurities will always stay with her to the point where it's a possible cause for the break-up of past relationships. For the most part, it takes a guy who is willing to stay by her side and work through those insecurities and not run away from them leaving her with even more emotional baggage to work through.

Personally speaking, there are qualities that I've seen in a woman who I can honestly and genuinely admit that I have a thing for. She's a simplistic, laid back person who enjoys good music, books, etc. Her caring thoughtfulness shows her deep sincerity for others, especially for her friends who she is loyal to. She is a free spirited traveler with an artistic, creative side to her. She's serious and goal oriented and even though she may not meet those goals at times, she's able to the best of her ability handle it with utmost dignity. She has an overall quirkiness that reveals a wacky side with a very infectious laugh to match, which makes part of her personality so attractive, BUT what brings it all together is her heart that has an absolute love for God and her willingness to serve Him.

Someone said, ~You attract people by the qualities you display. You keep them by the qualities you possess.~ In retrospect, its easy to be attracted by the qualities that a person exude at first glance such as his or her eyes, smile, and their body, which can be mesmerizing as if you're like a deer staring into headlights. Anyways, if you truly care about someone you have to take the time to read what he/she is thinking behind those eyes, what the reasons are that makes him/her light up when she smiles, and oftentimes you have to forget about the physical aspect because it can get old real fast. In the end, what makes relationships last is not looking at the qualities from the outside in, but rather looking at the qualities from the inside out with one's heart as the starting point.

Young At Heart

Vincent Van Gogh once said, ~Love is eternal - the aspect may change, but not the essence. There is the same difference in a person before and after he is in love as there is an unlighted lamp and one that is burning. The lamp was there and was a good lamp, but now it is shedding light too, and that is its real function. And love makes one calmer about many things and way, one is more fit for one's work.~ In some aspect, love is considered to be immortal as it has been able to survive throughout the ages in a metaphorical lamp known as the human heart. Encased within one's so-called lamp is a seemingly ageless love that even though it tends to flicker at times, the essence of it continues to be felt, which shows how love never really dies out in your heart.

Let me ask you this question, what do you think the essence of love embodies that it has been able to survive over the years? In my own thinking, there is a certain amount of untainted, pure innocence and honesty to where it gives off an illuminating glow, which can give you that sometimes warm, fuzzy feeling not only in your heart, but also in your soul as well. Unfortunately, its that same untainted, pure innocence and honesty, which can become tainted by experiencing the pangs of painful heartbreak and deceit that can have the illuminating glow fade into something that is seen as dark, as well as, dreary to the point where you gradually lose that warm, fuzzy feeling one gets when you meet someone who makes your internal lamp simply light up.

When it comes to the fuel that keeps the essence of love within the lamp of your heart consistently shining no matter how many times one thinks its going to run out is caring thoughtfulness. If you think about it, its a priceless fuel source that absolutely never runs out as it comes from a person and/or a group of people who truly and genuinely love/care about you. Its these particular people who, in a manner of speaking, the fuel source that helps shed light on aspects of life and love that are oftentimes covered in darkness. Without a doubt, its comforting to know you have friends, family, and hopefully that certain someone special who you trust to help you light your way in the direction when you find yourself lost in the darkness of your very own feelings and emotions.

Essentially, the glue that holds it all together is the one thing that can most definitely burn you if its not taken seriously and that is trust. For centuries it's been the cornerstone of any relationship and yet it has been broken because of it being taken advantage of to where he or she inevitably steals that essence away from you leaving you with a cold empty feeling inside your heart. It's a sad situation indeed to experience, but when you do finally meet someone who can bring it back you can slowly put your trust in him or her to where you both can comfortably wrap/embrace it around each other without any doubts and/or fears in your mind like a warm blanket. For the question can be asked, do you share a blanket of trust, so to speak, with someone special who lights up your heart?

In retrospect, love or true love for that matter has been able to stand the test of time without aging one bit as if it took the fabled elixir Ponce De Leon searched for known as the fountain of youth. In any case, there are countless stories over the past two thousand years where the essence of love remains burning within not just our hearts, but also our minds as well. Such stories of love that truly stay with us are William Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet, Humphrey Bogart and Audrey Hepburn from the classic movie Casablanca, God sacrificing himself for all mankind, etc. In the end, no matter how much we change as we grow older, love never changes as it continues to brighten, as well as, warms the hearts of both ourselves and those around us, who will always be young at heart.

My Better Half

Someone once said, ~Today I begin to understand what love must be, if it exists. When we are parted, we each feel the lack of the other half of ourselves. We are incomplete like a book in two volumes of which the first has been lost. That is what I imagine love to be: incompleteness in absence.~ Let me ask you this question, when it comes to love or true love for that matter have you finally met/found the other half of your heart who, in a sense, is the proverbial ying to your yang when it pertains to completing whole what each of us have been wanting and/or needing in our own lives. For that special someone truly compliments in certain ways that you absolutely thank God for bringing him or her into your life.

Without a doubt, there are times in life where it can just get serious to the point where each of us becomes that way too serious person who inevitably needs to have that stick removed from up one's buttockal region in order to lighten up. Every person has been in a situation where one has encountered a certain amount of tension being built up either around or to you that people can literally cut it with a knife because of how thick it is. In any case, each of us want/need that someone who is considered to be our very own stand up comedian who make you laugh when you need it the most, which can sometimes be done without even trying by doing or saying something fairly stupid that it not only a puts a smile on your face, but it also relaxes you as well.

Essentially, when it comes to life and love you want/need someone who can be your teacher and yet at the same time be the student as well. In other words, that person is the one who can make you intellectually stronger as he or she shares with you one's thoughts and philosophies all-the-while being taught from you what you have learned in life, as well as, in love. Its a tough situation indeed to meet that special someone who can keep your brain constantly stimulated with not just the useful information that can make you think, but also with the useless somewhat stupid information that tends to get stuck in our brain on a semi-daily basis, which basically balances out the smart to dumb ratio in the whole scheme of things.

For the question can be asked of you, do you have a great motivator in your life who doesn't let you play hooky when there is some much needed work to be done? It would probably be safe to say that we all have a lazy, procrastinating, slacker side to us that can prevent us from accomplishing what we need to do. Oftentimes, a person wants/needs that someone who can kick you in the buttockal region to motivate you like how a drill instructor would, but done in a hopefully more loving way of course. If you think about it, when you have someone in your life that doesn't let you quit no matter how hard it is and is with you every step of the way to reach your greatest potential then you know you're truly a blessed person.

In retrospect, every person has or hopes to have that person in one's life who they can honestly say is their best friend forever. It’s one's bff that they can turn to when life just gets frustrating that being given a simple smile you know everything is alright and with some encouraging words gets you back in the game of life, in a manner of speaking, when you have thoughts of throwing in the towel. Ultimately, it's a dream come true to have him or her standing by your side that you just have to pinch yourself to know that you're not dreaming. In the end, when you look at the special someone in your life you either say to yourself or to that person you're holding in your arms you're most definitely my better half, which is a song by the successful Australian country music singer Keith Urban.

All Aboard

Marcel Proust once said, ~The moments of the past do not remain still, they retain in our memory the motion which drew them towards the future, towards a future which has itself become the past, and draw us on in their train.~ Without a doubt, the countless memories each of us have stored away in our minds are, in some ways, like pieces of individual luggage being transported on the train of time. Its within one's own luggage room of a mind that certain memories are either kept up front for easy access to unpack, kept in the middle to protect/preserve it until the time is right to unpack, or kept in the very back where one would most definitely pick up and throw out the window while in motion to never be remembered ever again.

If you think about it, whenever we take a ride on the memory lane express heading to somewhere in the past you can hear a distinct click as your ticket is being punched by one's metaphorical train conductor who is in charge of all the luggage that gets stored, as well as, viewed on a daily basis. It can boggle the mind on how many times a certain memory, bad or good, is unpacked that trying to re-pack everything that one took out to reminisce about would make a person go completely crazy. It's tough enough being in charge of our own memories, but the thought of being in charge of someone else's memories would make anyone pull the chord to stop the train, jump out the window, and run for dear life.

As it was said before, there are certain memories that are kept up front or in the middle and they are a representation of the luggage you truly hold near and dear to your heart. For the memories that one keeps up front and tends to get unpacked the most are the fun times shared with your bestest of friends who made one's railroad trip a hopefully bumpless experience. When it comes to the luggage that is securely fastened in the middle it only gets unpacked when you look back on those deeply touching and intimate memories shared with a loved one such as giving birth, getting engaged or married. It's those treasured memories and others more like it that mean so much to where they're always labeled handle with care because of how priceless they are to you.

Essentially, there are certain memories every person carries around with them that he or she would gladly never unpack, but unfortunately you can't help but remember. It's the type of luggage that is oftentimes referred to as baggage and it would be safe to say that many of us would gladly take our personal painful baggage, lock it in a giant trunk, and 86 it out the proverbial window of our mind forever never to be relived again. However, life doesn't work that way as we can only try to suppress them to the back of our minds the best we possibly can, but there will come a point where that unexpected train whistle blows to where an unwanted painful memory walks in, sits next to you, and annoys you to no end.

In retrospect, the memories we all have don't keep a timed schedule as they arrive and leave whenever they want to, which can be very unpredictable. One minute you could be thinking about your favorite cartoons you watched as a kid and then the next minute you're thinking about how you broke up with someone who you considered immature because he or she still watches cartoons. Personally speaking, I see nothing wrong with watching cartoons as I'm a child of the 80's who not only continues to watch them, but also buys the DVD's like the 20th anniversary of Transformers: The Movie. In the end, whenever the memory lane express arrives to pick you up and whisks you away to the past, you'll inevitably hear these two words said.....ALL ABOARD!

Whenever You Come Around

O.A. Battista once said, ~The greatest weakness of most humans is their hesitancy to tell others how much they love them while they're alive.~ Without a doubt, telling someone how you truly feel about him or her is considered one of the most difficult things any person can possibly try to do. It's oftentimes that unexplainable experience that every person has experienced one time or another when it pertains to someone who with or without any reasons makes you smile. Yet, if that particular person is the one who makes you happy then why is it so hard to express face to face how you feel that it can cause you to become absolutely powerless, in a manner of speaking, to the point you're literally getting weak in the knees?

Thinking about it, it's being scared of and looking into the unknown as you have that choice of either telling that person or keeping it hidden within your heart and soul. For some people they've chosen to take that risk while others have chosen the latter as one wishes to tell him or her, but what's holding them back are the times of past heartbreak and disappointments that one doesn't want to experience again. By making that choice, it keeps you from doing or saying anything that you would later kick yourself for, but unfortunately you can't stop yourself from doing it either. For the most part, the things one says or does such as sending flowers are honestly and genuinely done with only the best of intentions in mind.

Essentially, it can be an intimidating situation to be in as you see, try to talk to, or be around someone who makes you feel like a child. What do I mean? Essentially, you have no idea how to act as the calm, straight forward, somewhat intelligent conversationalist you're known as tends to take a back seat, so to speak, and is replaced by someone who you would be diagnosed with and/or suffering from ADD or ADHD. For the focus is just not there and when you do try to focus you gradually experience an edgy nervousness to the point where you can't sit still to gather one complete thought or any thought for that matter. Funny as it may seem to witness, it's not fun by any means to experience whatsoever...trust me on this.

Let me ask you this question, why be so afraid of someone who you know not only makes you automatically smile, but you also know he or she would never intentionally hurt in any way? As said before, it's the intimidation factor as it's hard to find the words to say that are just on the tip of your tongue, but when you open your mouth to say them, nothing seems to want to come out. We all have experienced or are experiencing it as the reasons why that remains one of those so called unsolved mysteries because it usually happens only with that particular person and not with any other guys or girls who you can not only speak clearly to, but also make perfect sense of what you're actually saying.

Personally speaking, it's been a year since meeting a woman, who shall remain nameless, that automatically puts a smile on my face as her smile and mere presence simply turns my upside down world rightside up. There are times where its easy to talk to her, but then there are times where I experience the biggest brainfart known to man and I have no idea how to act. Why? I don't know but maybe it's the kid in me that hasn't been excited about someone in quite awhile. In the end, I want her to know that even though she may not feel the same way, whenever you come around just to hang out are the times you've actually made not only my day, but also my life worthwhile, which is a song by Vince Gill that best describes how I feel.

What Hurts The Most

Someone once said, ~It hurts to love someone and not be loved in return, but what is more painful is to love someone and never find the courage to let that person know how you feel. Giving someone all your love is never an assurance that they will love you back. Don't expect love in return, just wait for it to grow in their heart. But if it doesn't, be content that it grew in yours.~ Without a doubt, women fall for the wrong guys and yet the same can be said for guys as well who fall for the wrong/random women. It would be safe to say that all the moms in the world have told their son(s)to meet, settle down, and marry a real good woman who is truly Ms. Right in her eyes. Yet, the question remains though, what constitutes a real good woman?

Thinking about it, a real good woman is considered to be loyal and supportive not just to the man she loves, but also to her friends that are right alongside her as well. A type of supportive loyalty that goes beyond friendship to where she will not only fight for you, but also defend you when you're being dissed by other people. However, that supportive loyalty is a two way street, so to speak, as her man and friends must be willing to do the same for her at the drop of a hat, because she is absolutely worth it. A worthwhile woman that won't spill any secrets within the relationship to where if any problems occur its handled with utmost respect face to face and not share with anyone else to put their 2 cents in.

When it comes to a real good woman, she most definitely oozes patience with sensibility to match, especially for the man she loves who can drive her to experience/express every emotion in the book. It's most definitely takes a lot of patience for any woman to be with a guy who can turn at times into a stubborn, jealous, egomaniacal, not getting enough attention seeking little boy and it's that same exact guy who can be humble enough to swallow his pride to say I'm sorry even if he knows he's right, which is hard for a woman to find these days. In addition, she exudes a common sense type of smartness to her that says she knows the right things to do and avoid the wrong things, especially when it involves raising kids.

Essentially, a real good woman is strong yet has that delicateness to her, which is a double whammy in my book. A woman who is strong enough to handle/deal with times of heartbreak in the past with her head held high with an equally strong support system by her side helping her to keep from sinking into that deep, dark abyss where she can fall into. It's that same woman who is not afraid to shed some tears to show that even though she is a strong woman, she is still in fact a woman who not only wants to be held and comforted by the arms of her man, but also wants that assurance she will be well protected in those same arms that the tears fade and is replaced with a beautiful smile that just lights up the room.

In retrospect, that is what a real good woman is and you know what, I not only met that woman I am crazy about her. Unfortunately, I messed it up by giving a long diatribe of what I liked about her in an email and not just saying what was in my heart face to face. Why? Plain and simple, it's hard to talk to her because the times I had the chance I just couldn't speak. What I would have said if given a second chance is that she's the type of woman who I can see growing old with and when it comes to kids, I know that I would like to have them someday. She is beautiful in every sense both spiritually, as well as, physically and even though she doesn't see it in herself I have always seen it. In the end, what hurts the most is that she won't know how I really feel, which has just been tearing me up inside and it's a song in which everybody can relate to by the country group Rascal Flatts that best reflects this thought.

The Story of My Life

Mark Twain once said, ~There was never yet an uninteresting life. Such things are an impossibility. Inside of the dullest exterior there is a drama, a comedy, and a tragedy.~ Let me ask you this question, do you consider your life interesting and if so, would you make it into a reality show? It would be a tough call to make and yet, in a way, each one of us are starring, as well as, living in a little reality show called life. Even though there aren't any cameras following our every move and listening to anything that would remotely be considered "great television", something happens around or to you that it may very well in fact capture the attention of the viewing audience, who loves to watch/listen to dramas, comedies, and/or tragedies.

When it comes to our own lives, there is without a doubt no shortage of drama as life tends to inadvertently or purposefully draws people towards you in order to rake up some higher ratings, so to speak. We all try to avoid it as much as possible, but somehow you find it or it finds you in the form of a person or group of people who having nothing else better to do with their lives than to just to shake things up in your life by stirring the proverbial pot of conniving mischief for their own sick, twisted, and pleasurable amusement. Every person has their fair share of drama on any given day, but for some people its an ongoing saga that even the late Aaron Spelling couldn't even possibly conceive from his own brilliant, imaginative mind.

Within every reality show, there should always be a cast of characters who bring some much needed comedy to fill one's day laughter. Oftentimes the laughter will always be provided by your bestest of friends as they're considered comedians who just make life fun. Whether or not you consider yourself the straight man or woman who can keep a straight face among the comic relief that make it their primary job to put a smile on your face when you don't get the punchlines to the jokes that life/love hand you that it not only doesn't make any sense whatsoever, but it also can get you down. Let me tell you something, at times I consider myself the straight man who is truly lucky enough to be surrounded by a bunch of funny and hilarious comedians.

Essentially, a reality show isn't a reality show if there aren't any unfortunate tragedies that supposedly make great stories to flashback on. The type of tragedies that are relatable in some way to our own lives to where one's own heart is touched and tears are possibly shed. A loss of a loved one, cases of physical/mental abuse, or whatever the case may be that will most definitely keep america glued to their television sets, which I'm sorry to say TPTB(the powers that be) thrive on for the expressed purpose of making money off the suffering of others. For the question can be asked, would you be in a reality show knowing you could no longer keep/protect your anonymity as you're, in all intents and purposes, "naked" in front of the whole world.

For the past 10 years, I have personally starred in my own reality show and even though you haven't seen it on tv, you've actually read the transcripts on a semi-daily basis. For some of you have been reading them since the very beginning while others have in recent months just started reading them and are trying to catch up or already caught up on what you may have missed. It's in these transcripts, otherwise known as Yodaisms, you have gotten to know me and quite possibly many of could actually give me a rundown about my life through those Yodaisms, which I throw out a challenge to anyone who can do so...but I digress. In the end, its within the written transcripts to my little reality show you inevitably get a sneak peak into the story of my life.

The Heart of A Champion

Marcus Aurelius once said, ~The art of living is more like wrestling than dancing.~ Ladies and gentlemen, this may sound strange, but love is a lot like the sport of professional wrestling, which to you may be the strangest comparison about love and yet, you should know by now there is a method to my madness. In any case, when it comes to love we're all in the squared circle known as the ring of life where we've wrestled or are wrestling with feelings and emotions for someone that have bounced or are bouncing side to side against the ropes within our own heart as they're metaphorically dropkicked, clotheslined, flipped, bearhugged, etc. to the point where you either tap out or say I quit because you don't want to endure any more pain.

Without a doubt, love can hit you pretty hard out of nowhere without warning like being hit with a steel chair and the impact can leave not only your head disoriented, but also your heart as well. No matter how much preparation you take to anticipate/receive a blow like that you will never be able to see it coming as it will sneak up on you, tap you on the shoulder, and clock you upside the head so hard your brain is scrambled, which is what love does. For some, most, or all people have been hit so many times that they've gradually lost brain cells not because of falling in love, but rather from the dizzying heartbreak caused by someone who took their heart and performed a nasty conchairto that would most definitely not merit another encore.

As a professional wrestling fan, I've learned at a very young age that its predetermined ahead of time and not fake, which any die hard wrestling fan will get mad at you for...but I digress. Somewhat like wrestling, love can be in fact faked by a guy or girl who is simply going through the motions and not using the one thing that matters most in love...heart. For if that person doesn't put his or her whole heart into someone who one supposedly loves, all time, effort, and hard work you willing put in was wasted for nothing. Let me tell you something, its all about teamwork as you have work together to build a strong cohesive unit with someone who may be or already is your future tag team partner for life.

Oftentimes, love can be considered the dirtiest player in the game as you can put your complete trust in that certain someone to never hurt you, but once your back is turned he or she can stab you in the back by giving you a low blow that you truly didn't deserve at all. Essentially, every person wants to meet their future tag team partner who won't leave you high and dry when life's most difficult problems are stomping a mudhole all over you. Its at that point you reach out for a tag and instead of that person letting you suffer, he or she tags in and takes on/fights off the stress that is pounding on you. Let me ask you this question, wouldn't you love to have partner like this who is always going to have your back no matter what?

In retrospect, we all hold close within us a title belt that we can metaphorically raise proudly over our heads and absolutely nobody can ever take it away from us unless it's that potential tag team partner for life who we can truly give it to without wondering if he or she will betray us. Whether one does or doesn't, don't be that person who keeps score as you count it in your proverbial win/loss column recorded in your heart, which doesn't really matter. In the end, what truly matters are the times you keep getting back into the ring when you've been thrown over the top rope so many times that it not only shows you how much drive you have to not be a quitter, but it also shows you have the heart of a champion.

A Real Good Man

Someone once said, ~A woman has got to love a bad man once or twice in her life to be thankful for a good one.~ Without a doubt, there has always been a general consensus among women that they can never find any good guys out there anymore and if they do find one they're either gay or married. Ladies, let me tell you something: the good guys you are looking for are not hard to find because they've always been right there by your side physically or in spirit for you when you needed them, but refused to see/accept them as anything other than just a friend. So ladies, please accept the following apologies from the good and decent guys of the world like myself who basically say as a whole with heartfelt regret I'm sorry.

I'm sorry that we're just not that cute enough to go on a date with you because we don't fit the type of guy you're looking for who doesn't really measure up to the level of cuteness that you have in your mind. It's a level that we may very well be close to, but unfortunately we're not high enough on the scale of good looks to be given one's full and undivided attention. If I may ask, where is the so-called bar set so we can either aspire to be or change/improve whatever it is that we're lacking so we can reach or at least go past the bar you so nicely set for us to climb. Hey, it's okay we're fine with it as we've gotten used to those challenges and if they’re not met we still have our winning personality going for us that you've seemed to always mention.

I'm sorry that we've always had the time or took the time out of our possibly busy lives to spend time with you to talk, vent, and/or be there as a shoulder to cry on unlike your current or past relationships who chose to spend time quality time with their boys rather than quality time with you. The sleepless nights staying up with you as you eventually felt better probably didn't matter to you much knowing that we could have not only said no to talk, but bit our tongue from saying I told you so because I cared about/loved you that much not to. All in all, it's been a pleasure being there for you when you needed someone to turn to when you were sad and/or miserable and when you left my side you left happy and in good spirits. I wonder why that is?

I'm sorry for being the well mannered gentlemen who treats you with the utmost respect that you are truly deserving of. We guess respecting your boundaries and treating you like a lady isn't what you want in a guy after all. So what we're thinking is you want a guy who is the total opposite as he is totally disrespectful to you by not only getting way too close into your personal space, but also seeing you simply as an object of his affection, which wouldn't absolutely make you the least bit uncomfortable. Oh, before I forget, remind me again if staring at your chest while talking to you is appropriate or do we have to look at/into your beautiful eyes that seem to just light up your face when you smile.

In retrospect, there are so many more things that we're sorry about, but unfortunately they wouldn't be able fit in the usual 5 paragraphs that you've read in these Yodaisms. Thinking about it, in every nice guy there lies a bad boy just wanting to get out and yet its our choice whether or not we want to throw away our integrity to become someone that we have to face in the mirror every single day. Remember this ladies: bad boys come and come, but he's a nice guy that will always be there for you helping you pick up the pieces of your heart when you're left in tears. So, ladies rethink passing up that guy who may not be a jaw droppingly sexy hottie because in the end, he'll turn out to be for you, a real good man, which is a song that sort of reflects this thought by country superstar Tim McGraw.

You Are So Beautiful

Ralph waldo Emerson once said, ~We ascribe beauty to that which is simple, which has no superfluous parts, which exactly answers its ends, which stands related to all thing, which is the mean of many extremes.~ When it comes to women, guys never really keep simple and most definitely have a plethora of sometimes confusing descriptions on how they look. Its those particular terms every woman has heard over and over again from guys who either say it as a nice gesture to compliment how they look on that day or say it in a more flirtatious kind of way for the expressed purpose of hooking up. Of the many terms used, the three essential terms that will be discussed are: P.H.A.T, smokin', and cute.

Without a doubt, every woman has probably been told by a guy or a group of guys that she looks P.H.A.T. and I'm not talking about the word that deals with the issue of weight. This term, I'm referring to is an acronym that means Pretty Hot And Tempting, which is a mainstream African American urban term that was quite possibly introduced by comedic actor Chris Tucker from movies such as Friday, as well as, Rush Hour 1 & 2, but I may be wrong. In any case, when it comes to women looking P.H.A.T, they basically have that appeal where guys not only metaphorically eat'em up but also guys would actually physically fight each other just to get the chance to be the first to get her name and number.

Let me ask you this question ladies, when was the last time a guy or a group of guys for that matter referred to you as smokin' or even smokin' hot? For its a term that is oftentimes used when a woman is considered so attractive that one touch or look from her will not only metaphorically burn a guy, but also leave him hot under the collar, so to speak. So smokin' hot mind you, that a guy can and will literally sweat because of all the heat coming from her direction to the point a cold shower is needed to lower one's rising temperature due to her mere presence that may cause him to actually spontaneously combust. Although, it can never be scientifically proven as fact, there are countless guys out there who believe it whether its fact or fiction.

Essentially, every woman from the time they were little girls up until now have at some point been referred to as cute, which is considered a compliment any woman would be happy to receive...or so I thought. Over the years, women have despised and become angry over the term cute to the point they've supposedly branded it the mark of death because according to my sources cute apparently means ugly, which confuses me because women say guys are cute all the time, which makes us happy for the simple reason that getting any kind of recognition from them is a plus. In any case, cute is out and anything other than a particular banned word is readily accepted in her book if it is used in an appropriately respectful manner.

In retrospect, there are so many other terms that guys have on how a woman looks such as bangin', slammin', fine, a hottie, off the hook, off the chain, etc. Oftentimes, a woman will hear how she is so this and so that so many times that they can quite possibly get tired of it. Trust me ladies when I say that you will or already have met a guy who keeps it simple and doesn't believe you are so bangin' slammin, fine, a hottie, off the hook, or even off the chain. In the end, its the physical attraction that may catch a guy's eye, but what most attracts a guy like myself, in my opinion, is when you can look deep into a woman's eyes that you're able see into her heart, and with heartfelt genuine honestly say to her these words...you are so beautiful, which is considered one of the best classic songs of all time sung by Mr. Joe Cocker.