Essentially, there are moments in life where a person looks back and smiles. For its that particular moment of one's life that brought you joy, happiness, plus some tears as well, and it was something to be proud of. Proud not in an arrogant/egotistical way, but proud in a sense that you were glad you experienced and/or witnessed something special live and in living color, so to speak. Let me ask you this question, was there a particular moment in life in which you were proud to have gone through your experiences even the situation was a tough/diffcult task to accomplish? For the most part, there are many things to be proud in our lives, but the main three things are the following: graduation, marriage, and kids.
Without a doubt, graduation is a momentus occasion for students who worked their butt for 4 years or more. Whether its high school or college, a person gave their blood, sweat, as well as, tears plus a lot of sleepless nights to stand on stage with their classmates and friends to finally receive that all important document. A document that seemed out of reach in the beginning, but as you metaphorically climbed that tough academic ladder, it slowly but surely was within reach. In some aspect, the weight of the world on one's shoulders will be lifted off and a much derserving big sigh of relief is given once that diploma hit your hand. For the question can be asked, how did it feel for you as you finally walked across the stage and were handed that proverbail holy grail?
When it comes to marriage, its a proud moment between you and your significant other to be. However, the road to the alter can have several or many setbacks such as a bride/groom having substantial doubts or cold feet. Other factors that could complicate things are the potential in-laws not getting along and most definitely the planning of the wedding itself can cause friction. Friction not only between families bit also between the bride and groom to the point that the wedding is either postponed or called off entirely. Every person has either been in, been involved or witnessed that particular situation, but if you have an excellent support system backing you up the all with hopefully be well.. For when you look at each other from the aisle and face to face at the alter, everything beforehand is inconsequential.
Working in the asylum for the past 9 years, there have been many proud moments I've experienced and one particular proud moment happen on the day of my birthday as "my kids" and fellow co-workers showed me some love. If you are wondering, yes I did work on my borthday and I'm glad i did because I would have missed out on something special, but I digress. In any case, a card was made by "my kids" and every kids plus staff signed it. I also recieved individual cards with gifts that they made especially for me which I gave them a big bear hug in return. The gift giving ended with two birthday cakes that were from a friend/ fellow co-worker and one from one of "my kids", which gave me a warm feeling inside knowing they cared...it was that or indigestion...just kidding.;)
In retrospect, every person will experience proud moments and those proud moments will be overshadowed by other proud moments. When it comes to looking back at those moments in your life are they worthy to be rated or do they stand alone as one moment you will always remember? For it was about a week ago, when I realized I wasn't able to do a particular break dance move for the expressed purpose of entertaining my Godson and in the process I hurt my lower back. Well, it was on that same night I was able to see my Godson walk a few step, which was an extremely proud moment for me. In the end, even though I wasn't his dad, I felt like a proud dad and at that particular moment these three words came out of my mouth... that's my boy!
Sunday, August 28, 2005
Thursday, August 25, 2005
Ain't As Good As I Once Was
Robert Louis Stevenson once said, ~We advance in years somewhat in the manner of an invading army in a barren land; the age that we have reached, as the saying goes, we but hold with an outpost, and still keep open communication with the extreme rear and first beginnings of the march.~ Essentially, a person can't stop birthdays from coming no matter how many times you try to deny it, the fact is ithey will happen. Women, more so than guys, oftentimes don't acknowledge the concept of actual age to the age they really are and that is why lying about one's age is so widely done which just seems pointless to do. In some aspect, its like an ongoing battle against the biggest adversary we all face sooner or later...Father Time.
Without a doubt, there are certain things from our childhood that a person just can't do no matter how hard he or she tries to do it. Certain things such as playing with a hula hoop and make it stay around your own waist which looks easy enough when you see kids do it. Plus, you did it as a kid, so it will probably come naturally to you and you'll show these young kids how its done. Unfortunately, for some adults we tend to lose that ability and we tend to overthink what we're doing wrong to the point where you can totally be frustrated. So frustrated in fact, one will throw the hula hoop away because you can't seem to master it whereas kids will go for it and succeed, which kinda hurts one's own pride as we are defeated by a simple round object
You would think getting out of bed would be considered something that a person would easily get the hang of. Think about it, when we were younger we would generally spring out of bed, do our morning routine, put our clothes on, eat breakfast, get your stuff ready and then face whatever battles that one was going to face or be put in front of us. Now as an adult there isn't much of a spring anymore when one gets out of bed but rather more of a fall out of bed roll type maneuver, which every person will do eventually. In all honesty it will happen to you in an instant with absolutely no warning as Father Time sneaks past security and metaphorically grabs your youth like a well trained Navy Seal.
Working in the asylum, a person's back will never be the same again as kids will ambush you from time to time which is never a good feeling. Whether its a foward assault or from behind, they have that no mercy, take no prisoners attitude. When it comes to bending down it can be truly an event in and of itself, as you will find yourself tying shoes, picking up, pushing, or pulling stuff which one will truly feel it later or the next day depending on how many times you do it. Let me tell you something, when I first started there I walked normal and could bend down with ease; but after 9 years there I have developed the old man walk and whenever I bend down I make the old man noise/grunt, which is at times very amusing to the kids of the asylum.
Today is my 28th birthday and when you reach a certain age such as 28, there are just some things you are never meant to do or try to attempt again. A couple of nights ago, I was entertaining my Godson and I had the bright idea of doing a break dance move somewhat like WWE wrestler Booker T's spin-a-rooni. On a side note, my break dance moves were good/ok back in day, nothing that really wows the crowd, but I digress. To make a long story short, I ended up hurting my lower back. For the next five minutes I was on the floor looking up at the ceiling and telling myself never to do that again. In the end, when it comes to trying to perform break dance moves now, pardon my grammer when I say I ain't as good as I once was and its a song by Toby Keith that everybody can literally or figuratively relate to.
Without a doubt, there are certain things from our childhood that a person just can't do no matter how hard he or she tries to do it. Certain things such as playing with a hula hoop and make it stay around your own waist which looks easy enough when you see kids do it. Plus, you did it as a kid, so it will probably come naturally to you and you'll show these young kids how its done. Unfortunately, for some adults we tend to lose that ability and we tend to overthink what we're doing wrong to the point where you can totally be frustrated. So frustrated in fact, one will throw the hula hoop away because you can't seem to master it whereas kids will go for it and succeed, which kinda hurts one's own pride as we are defeated by a simple round object
You would think getting out of bed would be considered something that a person would easily get the hang of. Think about it, when we were younger we would generally spring out of bed, do our morning routine, put our clothes on, eat breakfast, get your stuff ready and then face whatever battles that one was going to face or be put in front of us. Now as an adult there isn't much of a spring anymore when one gets out of bed but rather more of a fall out of bed roll type maneuver, which every person will do eventually. In all honesty it will happen to you in an instant with absolutely no warning as Father Time sneaks past security and metaphorically grabs your youth like a well trained Navy Seal.
Working in the asylum, a person's back will never be the same again as kids will ambush you from time to time which is never a good feeling. Whether its a foward assault or from behind, they have that no mercy, take no prisoners attitude. When it comes to bending down it can be truly an event in and of itself, as you will find yourself tying shoes, picking up, pushing, or pulling stuff which one will truly feel it later or the next day depending on how many times you do it. Let me tell you something, when I first started there I walked normal and could bend down with ease; but after 9 years there I have developed the old man walk and whenever I bend down I make the old man noise/grunt, which is at times very amusing to the kids of the asylum.
Today is my 28th birthday and when you reach a certain age such as 28, there are just some things you are never meant to do or try to attempt again. A couple of nights ago, I was entertaining my Godson and I had the bright idea of doing a break dance move somewhat like WWE wrestler Booker T's spin-a-rooni. On a side note, my break dance moves were good/ok back in day, nothing that really wows the crowd, but I digress. To make a long story short, I ended up hurting my lower back. For the next five minutes I was on the floor looking up at the ceiling and telling myself never to do that again. In the end, when it comes to trying to perform break dance moves now, pardon my grammer when I say I ain't as good as I once was and its a song by Toby Keith that everybody can literally or figuratively relate to.
Friday, August 19, 2005
Here's Your Sign
Someone once said, ~The problem with America is stupidity, now I'm not saying there should be capital punishment for stupidity, but why don't we just take the safety labels off everything let the problem solve itself.~ If you think about it, there people you meet along your journey of life who have a good head on their shoulders and seem quite intelligent. Yet, there are some people who you meet that really need to get their head examined due to the fact they do or say things without being properly supervised. On any given day you could be standing next to or talking with someone who has the capacity to do or say something stupid; but the decision of when and where to show that particular act of stupidity rests on his or her capable shoulders.
Let me ask you this question, what was the most stupidest thing you ever saw, heard, done, or were involved in that when you look back you asked this simple question, why? For the most part, it seems harmless enough until one realizes there are consequences for his or her actions and the so called "victims" suffer from it. In some ways, its like catching a disease which there is no known cure for because quite frankly nobody is immune to random acts of minor or major stupidity. Yet, is it stupidity, a lack of common sense, or is it both that can get the better of a person? Case in point, there are a lot of stupid criminals and one particular criminal robbed a taco bell but instead of fleeing the scene he placed an order to go. The criminal was arrested at the scene.
Whether or not any of us wants to admit it we all go through spurts of stupidity every now and then. A perfect example is when we're in an elevator, there is a tendency to jump the gun, so to speak, and get off on the wrong floor. For its that realization that lets the people know of you minor act of stupidity, which they help to rectify your situation by letting you back in... sometimes. Its that split second decision to play it off as if you did get on the right floor that can be considered great acting on your part. Unfortunately, our own pride and stubborness can get the better of us to the point where we will not allow ourselves to get back on knowing they have alreadly been amused at your faux pas.
Without a doubt, love and stupidity go perfectly together like a peanut butter and jelly sandwhich. People can't help but be stupid when your with, near, or around someone you like or in with. For some unknown reason, the rational parts of our brain simply shut off and the irrational part turns on and takes control which is oftentimes never a good thing. For the question can be asked, were you ever in a past or in a present relationship where you saw and/or experienced total and utter stupidity either on your part or by that particular person. Undeniably, love can be or get stupid with the person your with; but if you can't be stupid with the one you love, then who can you be stupid with?
Working in the asylum for the past 9 years, I've seen, heard, been involved in, or done acts of stupidity that would make you either shake your head or roll on the floor laughing. One such act of stupidity involved my co-workers, a dare, a laundromat dryer, and me getting into that dryer. Needless to say I almost broke my neck doing something that seemed fun at the time but it would have suffered some serious injury such as not being able to walk. Anyways, acts of sheer stupidity will always happen, that's why we have the Darwin Awards to keep us informed and entertained all year round. In the end, comedian Bill Engvall said it best when he suggested that stupid people should where signs and if you ever come across a stupid person you can simply walk up to him or her and say here's your sign.
Let me ask you this question, what was the most stupidest thing you ever saw, heard, done, or were involved in that when you look back you asked this simple question, why? For the most part, it seems harmless enough until one realizes there are consequences for his or her actions and the so called "victims" suffer from it. In some ways, its like catching a disease which there is no known cure for because quite frankly nobody is immune to random acts of minor or major stupidity. Yet, is it stupidity, a lack of common sense, or is it both that can get the better of a person? Case in point, there are a lot of stupid criminals and one particular criminal robbed a taco bell but instead of fleeing the scene he placed an order to go. The criminal was arrested at the scene.
Whether or not any of us wants to admit it we all go through spurts of stupidity every now and then. A perfect example is when we're in an elevator, there is a tendency to jump the gun, so to speak, and get off on the wrong floor. For its that realization that lets the people know of you minor act of stupidity, which they help to rectify your situation by letting you back in... sometimes. Its that split second decision to play it off as if you did get on the right floor that can be considered great acting on your part. Unfortunately, our own pride and stubborness can get the better of us to the point where we will not allow ourselves to get back on knowing they have alreadly been amused at your faux pas.
Without a doubt, love and stupidity go perfectly together like a peanut butter and jelly sandwhich. People can't help but be stupid when your with, near, or around someone you like or in with. For some unknown reason, the rational parts of our brain simply shut off and the irrational part turns on and takes control which is oftentimes never a good thing. For the question can be asked, were you ever in a past or in a present relationship where you saw and/or experienced total and utter stupidity either on your part or by that particular person. Undeniably, love can be or get stupid with the person your with; but if you can't be stupid with the one you love, then who can you be stupid with?
Working in the asylum for the past 9 years, I've seen, heard, been involved in, or done acts of stupidity that would make you either shake your head or roll on the floor laughing. One such act of stupidity involved my co-workers, a dare, a laundromat dryer, and me getting into that dryer. Needless to say I almost broke my neck doing something that seemed fun at the time but it would have suffered some serious injury such as not being able to walk. Anyways, acts of sheer stupidity will always happen, that's why we have the Darwin Awards to keep us informed and entertained all year round. In the end, comedian Bill Engvall said it best when he suggested that stupid people should where signs and if you ever come across a stupid person you can simply walk up to him or her and say here's your sign.
Tuesday, August 16, 2005
Must Be Doing Something Right
Billy Currington said, ~A woman is a mystery. A man't can't just understand. Sometimes all it takes to please her is the touch of your hand. At other times you gotta take it slow, and hold her all night long. Heaven knows there's so many ways, a man can go wrong.~ As a guy, one of the greatest mysteries that is most oftentimes difficult to solve and/or unlock, other than love itself, is a woman's love. For the most part, every guy has been or still is trying figure out a woman's love due to the fact that some, not all, don't take the time to get to know them and what's in their heart. In my honest opinion, a woman's love is boundless, extends far beyond words can ever say, and reaches within the deepest parts of her heart and soul.
Let me ask you this question ladies, was there ever a guy in your life, past or present, who you thought could not only feel but also see the love you had/have for him? Essentially, its that guy who go "it" and new what the love of a women meant to him. It didn't mean just in the phsycal sense, but rather in emotional, spiritual, and intellectual sense as well. For he saw or sees the true bueaty behind the every day and simple things in life when shared in your company. Such beauties in life, which can pretty much be taken for granted at times, are things like a sunrise, a sunset, watching falling rain, a nice quiet dinner for two, sleeping under the stars, and/or dancing barefoot on the beach together under a mooonlit starry night.
In some aspect, a woman's love can be tender and warm as she gives you hugs and kisses that have meaning behind it. It can be flirtatious as she acts shy around around you knowing that there is nothing for her to be shy about. It can be friendly as she hits you are hard as she can in the arm and then apologize for it...sometimes. It can be compassionate as she pours her heart and soul out to you in which tears may or may not be shed. It can be dark and scary as you say or do the wrong things which can cause you to risk serious mental and/or physical injury of some sort. But without question, a woman's love can be absolutely priceless due to the fact that no amount of money can, could, or will never match the love she has for you.
Without a doubt, there is truth in a woman's love and in that truth she reveals to a guy a comfort factor. Its within that truth there comes a creative atmosphere where reason and rational thinking get thrown out the window, in a manner of speaking, and is replaced with something strong, yet fragile which is trust. For the question can be asked, how long does it take for you to be so comfortable around a particular guy that you start to reveal something about yourself? Inevitbaly, its putting faith in something such as trust where truth and love can either do two things for a woman and they are: 1) bring her sadness and emptiness or 2.) bring her happiness and contentment.
Andrea Dworkin once said, ~For a woman, love is defined as her willingness to submit to her own annihilation...The proof of love is that she is willing to be destroyed by the one whom she loves, for his sake. For the woman, love is always self-sacrifice, the sacrifice of identity, will, and bodily integrity, in order to fulfill and redeem the masculinity of her lover.~ In retrospect, the love of a good woman can be found by guys and its just a matter of truly opening their eyes to finally see who they have in front of them. In the end, every guy comes to a point where he thinks to himself as he looks at his girlfriend/wife and says I don't know what I did to deserve you in my life, but whatever it is I must be doing something right.
Let me ask you this question ladies, was there ever a guy in your life, past or present, who you thought could not only feel but also see the love you had/have for him? Essentially, its that guy who go "it" and new what the love of a women meant to him. It didn't mean just in the phsycal sense, but rather in emotional, spiritual, and intellectual sense as well. For he saw or sees the true bueaty behind the every day and simple things in life when shared in your company. Such beauties in life, which can pretty much be taken for granted at times, are things like a sunrise, a sunset, watching falling rain, a nice quiet dinner for two, sleeping under the stars, and/or dancing barefoot on the beach together under a mooonlit starry night.
In some aspect, a woman's love can be tender and warm as she gives you hugs and kisses that have meaning behind it. It can be flirtatious as she acts shy around around you knowing that there is nothing for her to be shy about. It can be friendly as she hits you are hard as she can in the arm and then apologize for it...sometimes. It can be compassionate as she pours her heart and soul out to you in which tears may or may not be shed. It can be dark and scary as you say or do the wrong things which can cause you to risk serious mental and/or physical injury of some sort. But without question, a woman's love can be absolutely priceless due to the fact that no amount of money can, could, or will never match the love she has for you.
Without a doubt, there is truth in a woman's love and in that truth she reveals to a guy a comfort factor. Its within that truth there comes a creative atmosphere where reason and rational thinking get thrown out the window, in a manner of speaking, and is replaced with something strong, yet fragile which is trust. For the question can be asked, how long does it take for you to be so comfortable around a particular guy that you start to reveal something about yourself? Inevitbaly, its putting faith in something such as trust where truth and love can either do two things for a woman and they are: 1) bring her sadness and emptiness or 2.) bring her happiness and contentment.
Andrea Dworkin once said, ~For a woman, love is defined as her willingness to submit to her own annihilation...The proof of love is that she is willing to be destroyed by the one whom she loves, for his sake. For the woman, love is always self-sacrifice, the sacrifice of identity, will, and bodily integrity, in order to fulfill and redeem the masculinity of her lover.~ In retrospect, the love of a good woman can be found by guys and its just a matter of truly opening their eyes to finally see who they have in front of them. In the end, every guy comes to a point where he thinks to himself as he looks at his girlfriend/wife and says I don't know what I did to deserve you in my life, but whatever it is I must be doing something right.
Saturday, August 13, 2005
Father Of The Bride
George Banks aka Steve Martin said, ~You fathers will understand. You have a little girl. An adorable little girl who looks up to you and adores you in a way you could never have imagined. I remember how her little hand used to fit inside mine. Then comes the day when she wants to get her ears pierced, and wants you to drop her off a block before the movie theater. From that moment on you're in a constant panic. You worry about her meeting the wrong kind of guy, the kind of guy who only wants one thing, and you know exactly what that one thing is, because it's the same thing you wanted when you were their age. Then, you stop worrying about her meeting the wrong guy, and you worry about her meeting the right guy. That's the greatest fear of all, because, then you lose her.~
Working in the asylum, a person pretty gets a front row seat on the discipline and raising of other people's kids. When it comes to kids, especially girls, you feel obligated to keep a close eye on them due to the fact you consider them like your very own daughters. Its an aspect of the job that one will never be able to outgrow because you spend time getting to know them not only on a professional level, but also a personal level as well. For the most part, through time they consider you a father figure and to be perfectly honest its a role I gladly accept. Its that so called father-daughter bond/relationship that grows over the years as you witness then grow up in stages from little girl, to teenager, and into a woman.
Like any father would with his own daughter(s), he would be concerned with how she/they dance. Essentially, there are three words that are generally used on a seemingly constant basis when it comes to "my girls" style of dancing and those three words are that's just wrong. One day their on your feet as you dance with them and the next thing you know you turn around and their dancing like their in a 50 Cent video, which in my eyes is unsuitable at their young age. It can be an embaressing and uncomfortable feeling seeing them do that type of dancing to where you seriously contimplate telling them or making a rule they can't dance like that until you're over the age of 18.
When it comes to dating, its usually treated the same with dancing only the age limited is hiked up tremendously. There have been many one on one conversations with my 6 & 7 girls that they are not dating at all or they're not dating till they 45 years old. Its basically one of things that you can't help but do because you want them stay that age and not lose thier innocence. For the most part, we can't be personally for them when they suffer their first broken heart from a guy that she realy liked. We can't be there when they pass their driving test and see the smile on their face being witness by mom and/or dad. Though, I may not be there for those specific events in life, I'm there for the events in between and that's ok with me.
In retrospect, all guy will always have those initial fears instilled into our being when we have a daugher or daughters of our own. Its that scary realization that she will someday meet the right guy and you will no longer be her/their # 1 guy, but rather her # 2 guy. For me personally, I will put the fear of God into each and every boy that stands in front of my door asking to take my daughter(s) kinda like how Martin Lawrence and Will Smith did it in Bad Boys 2. Ultimately, she will meet the right guy and hopefully its a guy that will treat her with the respect and dignity that is deserving for my daughter(s). In the end, its when the preacher asks who gives this woman to this man I will reluctantly but proudly say...I do, the father of the bride and a perfect song that goes with this song is Butterfly Kisses by Bob Carlisle.
Working in the asylum, a person pretty gets a front row seat on the discipline and raising of other people's kids. When it comes to kids, especially girls, you feel obligated to keep a close eye on them due to the fact you consider them like your very own daughters. Its an aspect of the job that one will never be able to outgrow because you spend time getting to know them not only on a professional level, but also a personal level as well. For the most part, through time they consider you a father figure and to be perfectly honest its a role I gladly accept. Its that so called father-daughter bond/relationship that grows over the years as you witness then grow up in stages from little girl, to teenager, and into a woman.
Like any father would with his own daughter(s), he would be concerned with how she/they dance. Essentially, there are three words that are generally used on a seemingly constant basis when it comes to "my girls" style of dancing and those three words are that's just wrong. One day their on your feet as you dance with them and the next thing you know you turn around and their dancing like their in a 50 Cent video, which in my eyes is unsuitable at their young age. It can be an embaressing and uncomfortable feeling seeing them do that type of dancing to where you seriously contimplate telling them or making a rule they can't dance like that until you're over the age of 18.
When it comes to dating, its usually treated the same with dancing only the age limited is hiked up tremendously. There have been many one on one conversations with my 6 & 7 girls that they are not dating at all or they're not dating till they 45 years old. Its basically one of things that you can't help but do because you want them stay that age and not lose thier innocence. For the most part, we can't be personally for them when they suffer their first broken heart from a guy that she realy liked. We can't be there when they pass their driving test and see the smile on their face being witness by mom and/or dad. Though, I may not be there for those specific events in life, I'm there for the events in between and that's ok with me.
In retrospect, all guy will always have those initial fears instilled into our being when we have a daugher or daughters of our own. Its that scary realization that she will someday meet the right guy and you will no longer be her/their # 1 guy, but rather her # 2 guy. For me personally, I will put the fear of God into each and every boy that stands in front of my door asking to take my daughter(s) kinda like how Martin Lawrence and Will Smith did it in Bad Boys 2. Ultimately, she will meet the right guy and hopefully its a guy that will treat her with the respect and dignity that is deserving for my daughter(s). In the end, its when the preacher asks who gives this woman to this man I will reluctantly but proudly say...I do, the father of the bride and a perfect song that goes with this song is Butterfly Kisses by Bob Carlisle.
Thursday, August 11, 2005
Oh, Grow Up
Emmanuel Kant once said, ~Enlightment is man's emergence from his self imposed immaturity. Immaturity is the inability to use one's understanding without guidance from another. This immaturity is self imposed when its cause lies not in the lack of understanding but in the lack of resolve and courage to use your own understanding.~ Undeniably, love is something that most people take for granted and of the reasons why there is such an immature attitude towards its is due to the fact that a person has some unresolved issues or feelings to work through. Whether or not, those issues or feelings will be resolved, there will always be a big question mark above that potential or significant relationship.
Essentially, relationships are hard enough without a person doing something totally immature and embaressing that it hurts him or her in the end. Let me ask you this question, have you ever seen, heard, or been in a relationship where a person's immature side showed by doing something such as flirting with someone right in front of one's own eyes, which can most definitely wound a person's heart. For its loving one person and yet selfishly wanting to be with other people, which every person felt at one time or another. Primarily, love is strong, driving, and very powerful, which makes it such a deadly force. A force that can build you up and break you down either gradually or in an instant.
For the questions can be asked, who is more immature or mature when it comes to love and relationships, guys or girls? To be perfectly honest, I am not going to answer that questions for fear I might get beat up if I do. For the most part, guys and girls can be immature when put into the position of opening their heart to someone that he or she truly feels comfortable being himself or herself with. Its that capacity to actually letting someone get to know us not just on the outside but on the inside which can be considered scary. So scary in fact, that feelings are put on hold and distance is put in between for the simple reason that if we fall in love with that person, we fall hard and.....if we ever fall in love again, we may fall harder and quite possibly not survive the impact, so to speak.
Unfortunately, immaturity can be taken to that proverbial next level which most of you have either been in, done, or witnessed to some extent. Its that immaturity where a person makes that particular guy or girl jealous by hooking up or messing around with someone else just to make him or her mad. Its that deluded perception that if one messes with that person emotionally then possibly he or she will realize that they are better off together than apart, which can backfire on a him or her. Initially, playing head games is considered the most immature thing guys, as well as, girls can do to each other, which shows that he and/or she isn't ready to be in a real relationship just yet.
In retrospect, its all about commitment and being mature enough to handle the emotions and everything else that comes with being in a lasting relationship. A person has to keep in mind that there are two people in the relationship rather than just one and without a doubt, tough times will be encountered to where it will test how far both the guy and/or girl are willing to go. When it comes to committing yourself to someone a person has to get away from the all about me mode and get into the all about we mode. For its the mutual trust, respect, honesty, understanding, and love for each other that flourishes and in turn the relationship flourishes. In the end, if you are with someone who is emotional mature and committed to you congrats; but for those that tend to keep meeting the emotionally immature and are commitment phobic, three words come to mind for them, oh grow up!
Essentially, relationships are hard enough without a person doing something totally immature and embaressing that it hurts him or her in the end. Let me ask you this question, have you ever seen, heard, or been in a relationship where a person's immature side showed by doing something such as flirting with someone right in front of one's own eyes, which can most definitely wound a person's heart. For its loving one person and yet selfishly wanting to be with other people, which every person felt at one time or another. Primarily, love is strong, driving, and very powerful, which makes it such a deadly force. A force that can build you up and break you down either gradually or in an instant.
For the questions can be asked, who is more immature or mature when it comes to love and relationships, guys or girls? To be perfectly honest, I am not going to answer that questions for fear I might get beat up if I do. For the most part, guys and girls can be immature when put into the position of opening their heart to someone that he or she truly feels comfortable being himself or herself with. Its that capacity to actually letting someone get to know us not just on the outside but on the inside which can be considered scary. So scary in fact, that feelings are put on hold and distance is put in between for the simple reason that if we fall in love with that person, we fall hard and.....if we ever fall in love again, we may fall harder and quite possibly not survive the impact, so to speak.
Unfortunately, immaturity can be taken to that proverbial next level which most of you have either been in, done, or witnessed to some extent. Its that immaturity where a person makes that particular guy or girl jealous by hooking up or messing around with someone else just to make him or her mad. Its that deluded perception that if one messes with that person emotionally then possibly he or she will realize that they are better off together than apart, which can backfire on a him or her. Initially, playing head games is considered the most immature thing guys, as well as, girls can do to each other, which shows that he and/or she isn't ready to be in a real relationship just yet.
In retrospect, its all about commitment and being mature enough to handle the emotions and everything else that comes with being in a lasting relationship. A person has to keep in mind that there are two people in the relationship rather than just one and without a doubt, tough times will be encountered to where it will test how far both the guy and/or girl are willing to go. When it comes to committing yourself to someone a person has to get away from the all about me mode and get into the all about we mode. For its the mutual trust, respect, honesty, understanding, and love for each other that flourishes and in turn the relationship flourishes. In the end, if you are with someone who is emotional mature and committed to you congrats; but for those that tend to keep meeting the emotionally immature and are commitment phobic, three words come to mind for them, oh grow up!
Tuesday, August 09, 2005
Anaylze That
Erich Fromm once said, ~We all dream, we don't understand our dreams, yet we act as if nothing strange goes on in our sleep minds, strange at least by comparison with the logical purposeful doing of our minds when we are awake.~ Did you know we have at least 5 dreams a night when we sleep? For the dreams we have can be weird, strange, and down right confusing, but they can have a deep hidden meaning to them. Without a doubt, the experiences we all go through on a day to day basis will manifest itself into something symbolic and its up to us to figure out they mean. Let me ask you this question, do you remember dreams when you wake up and do you dream in color or in black and white?
Essentially, every person has had that somewhat embaressing dream of being in his or her birthday suit at the one place you never want to be seen in the buff, which is in a school and/or college classroom. Its one of those situations in life or in your dreams that you don't want to be in or have happen to you unless you are an exhibitionist and love the attention, but I digress. In any case, when it comes to finding yourself in that type of vulnerable position the reasons may be something such as anxiety over performing an important speech, which can make anybody freak out. Personally speaking, I can talk to a room full of kids with no problems, but put me in front of a room full of my own peers I'll freeze up, as well, as go completely blank out at what I'm about to say.
For the most part, a person's job and those associated with that particular job will oftentimes affect what goes on in one's own dream world. Working in the asylum for the last 9 years, my dreams have been invaded by "my kids" who somehow find a way to beat me up even when I'm away from work and trying to sleep off the day I had with them. I'm doomed to live my waking and dreaming life as a proverbial punching bag, but you know what I'm their punching bag because I know they at least care about me and I with them. Primarily, its a no win situation for those work with kids as you can't get away from them physically because they will find you no matter where you go and you can't get away from them mentally due to the fact they make you absolutely crazy.
Undeniably, each and every one of us have had that same ongoing dream that you could never quite figure out. Its a dream where you are the main character and a cast of characters who you either know or don't know lead you on an adventure without leaving the comfort of your own bed. Although, you may feel comfortable the type of dream you're having will most definitely leave one drained to the point where its hard to function and keep focus at the tasks at hand the next day. For the question can be asked, when was the last time you had a dream like this and who was part of it that when you woke up the next day you had to share it with him, her, or them?
For the past several months, I've had this same ongoing dream involve the one thing I hate the most in this world and that is clowns. I can remember it vividly, its in color, and its starts off with me walking around in an airport and all of a sudden I start running after something or someone. That something or someone has a sheep under his or her arm, which isn't that weird until I look back a whole bunch of clowns are chasing after me with nerf bats. So I try to lose them by going through doors, gates, bathrooms and inevitably the chase turns into something you would see in a Scooby Doo cartoon. My dream ends when I catch that someone or something with the sheep under his or her arm; but I get tackled by the clowns, a dog pile ensues and that's when I wake up. In the end, analyze that and help me figure out what it all means.
Essentially, every person has had that somewhat embaressing dream of being in his or her birthday suit at the one place you never want to be seen in the buff, which is in a school and/or college classroom. Its one of those situations in life or in your dreams that you don't want to be in or have happen to you unless you are an exhibitionist and love the attention, but I digress. In any case, when it comes to finding yourself in that type of vulnerable position the reasons may be something such as anxiety over performing an important speech, which can make anybody freak out. Personally speaking, I can talk to a room full of kids with no problems, but put me in front of a room full of my own peers I'll freeze up, as well, as go completely blank out at what I'm about to say.
For the most part, a person's job and those associated with that particular job will oftentimes affect what goes on in one's own dream world. Working in the asylum for the last 9 years, my dreams have been invaded by "my kids" who somehow find a way to beat me up even when I'm away from work and trying to sleep off the day I had with them. I'm doomed to live my waking and dreaming life as a proverbial punching bag, but you know what I'm their punching bag because I know they at least care about me and I with them. Primarily, its a no win situation for those work with kids as you can't get away from them physically because they will find you no matter where you go and you can't get away from them mentally due to the fact they make you absolutely crazy.
Undeniably, each and every one of us have had that same ongoing dream that you could never quite figure out. Its a dream where you are the main character and a cast of characters who you either know or don't know lead you on an adventure without leaving the comfort of your own bed. Although, you may feel comfortable the type of dream you're having will most definitely leave one drained to the point where its hard to function and keep focus at the tasks at hand the next day. For the question can be asked, when was the last time you had a dream like this and who was part of it that when you woke up the next day you had to share it with him, her, or them?
For the past several months, I've had this same ongoing dream involve the one thing I hate the most in this world and that is clowns. I can remember it vividly, its in color, and its starts off with me walking around in an airport and all of a sudden I start running after something or someone. That something or someone has a sheep under his or her arm, which isn't that weird until I look back a whole bunch of clowns are chasing after me with nerf bats. So I try to lose them by going through doors, gates, bathrooms and inevitably the chase turns into something you would see in a Scooby Doo cartoon. My dream ends when I catch that someone or something with the sheep under his or her arm; but I get tackled by the clowns, a dog pile ensues and that's when I wake up. In the end, analyze that and help me figure out what it all means.
Sunday, August 07, 2005
The Journey Continues
Someone once said, ~The path of a relationship with true love is a like a trip together down an old dirt path in the woods. Sometimes it'll be beautiful and easy, other times it will be a rough walk with its ups and downs, turns and twists. But when you you're out of the woods and you look back, you are glad the journey took place, and in all, you are glad you and your special someone took it together. But the journey is not over, you only have just begun. So don't lose faith, keep on walking. If your love is true, the path you two take will never end.~ Before ever taking that trip, both guys and girls do some "exploring" in which they try to find out if both share any common goals or interests, which makes love and relationship that much more interesting.
Who likes to have a good laugh? I know I do, and its a common interest that basically everybody shares. Yet, when it comes to the funny guys and girls walk a seemingly different paths as to what is funny and what is just plain stupid. Let me give you an example, every red blooded guy loves the three stooges, who are in my opinion comedic geniuses. Its their brand of comedy that we find hilarious and to be perfectly honest we've probably tried a move or two on each other at one time or another growing up. Girls, on the other hand, watch the three stooges, scratch their heads, and wonder why squeezing a guy's head in a vice or hitting someone over the head with a wrench can be considered funny? My answer is...it just is and there is no logical explaination either.
Without a doubt, its hard enough meeting someone that you can truly click with, but its even harder to meet someone who enjoys the same things you do. For a woman, the path that they are walking on will always lead to guys that supposedly are interested in the same things that they are into. It's no secret that there are guys who will say anything to get their proverbial foot in the door and work their so called mojo as they continue to tell lie after lie of how they both are so alike. Essentially, its that smoothness that is exuded which can shield her vision to the point where he is leading her off the beaten path, in a manner of speaking, and getting her metaphorically lost in her own emotions.
For most single women, having kids is a goal that they would like to have someday; but its just a matter of finding the right guy who truly has that same goal and will walk that path with you side by side. But the question can be asked, how do you know if that particular guy wants to have kids or is just saying that just to be with you? What it comes down to in looking for that husband/father-to-be is that genuine vibe between guy and child/children, which can't be faked. Its that rare vibe in which a guy will hold a baby or step into a room and an immediate connection is witnessed by how he interacts with him, her, or them. Trust me ladies, that guy is out there somewhere and when you meet him don't let him go.
Someone said, ~As you journey through life, choose your destinations well, but do not hurry there. Wander the back roads and forgotten paths. Seek out new voices, strange sights, and ideas foreign to your own. Such things are riches for the soul.~ In retrospect, there is no rush to get to one's intended destination; for its the journey that will enlighten us as we meet new people, discover common interests/goals, and make any kind of impact on their lives,as well as ours. In some aspect, we're kinda like the fictional character Kwai Chang Caine as we travel on our individual paths to true love. Ultimately, for some, their travels have ended and a new path with that someone special has opened up; but others who are still traveling like myself, the journey continues.
Who likes to have a good laugh? I know I do, and its a common interest that basically everybody shares. Yet, when it comes to the funny guys and girls walk a seemingly different paths as to what is funny and what is just plain stupid. Let me give you an example, every red blooded guy loves the three stooges, who are in my opinion comedic geniuses. Its their brand of comedy that we find hilarious and to be perfectly honest we've probably tried a move or two on each other at one time or another growing up. Girls, on the other hand, watch the three stooges, scratch their heads, and wonder why squeezing a guy's head in a vice or hitting someone over the head with a wrench can be considered funny? My answer is...it just is and there is no logical explaination either.
Without a doubt, its hard enough meeting someone that you can truly click with, but its even harder to meet someone who enjoys the same things you do. For a woman, the path that they are walking on will always lead to guys that supposedly are interested in the same things that they are into. It's no secret that there are guys who will say anything to get their proverbial foot in the door and work their so called mojo as they continue to tell lie after lie of how they both are so alike. Essentially, its that smoothness that is exuded which can shield her vision to the point where he is leading her off the beaten path, in a manner of speaking, and getting her metaphorically lost in her own emotions.
For most single women, having kids is a goal that they would like to have someday; but its just a matter of finding the right guy who truly has that same goal and will walk that path with you side by side. But the question can be asked, how do you know if that particular guy wants to have kids or is just saying that just to be with you? What it comes down to in looking for that husband/father-to-be is that genuine vibe between guy and child/children, which can't be faked. Its that rare vibe in which a guy will hold a baby or step into a room and an immediate connection is witnessed by how he interacts with him, her, or them. Trust me ladies, that guy is out there somewhere and when you meet him don't let him go.
Someone said, ~As you journey through life, choose your destinations well, but do not hurry there. Wander the back roads and forgotten paths. Seek out new voices, strange sights, and ideas foreign to your own. Such things are riches for the soul.~ In retrospect, there is no rush to get to one's intended destination; for its the journey that will enlighten us as we meet new people, discover common interests/goals, and make any kind of impact on their lives,as well as ours. In some aspect, we're kinda like the fictional character Kwai Chang Caine as we travel on our individual paths to true love. Ultimately, for some, their travels have ended and a new path with that someone special has opened up; but others who are still traveling like myself, the journey continues.
Wednesday, August 03, 2005
The Greatest Adventure Of All
D.H. Lawrence said, ~One must learn to love, and go through a good deal of suffering to get to it, like any knight of th grail, and the journey is always towards the other, not away from it...To love you have to learn to understand the other, more that she understands herself, and to submit to her understanding of you. Its damnably difficult and painful, but it is the only thing which endures.~ Every woman has that proverbial fantasy of her knight in shining armor sweeping her off her feet and riding off into the sunset. Unfortunately, in this day and age its rare for a woman to meet a so called "knight" who exemplifies what she is looking for. Its at that point, metaphorically speaking, a guy will go on a so called quest to prove that her "knight" is absolutely real.
Without a doubt, for a guy, its that first initial step on his quest that it will lead him on journey, in which the first few steps are viewed as easy due to the fact that one's spirits are high. Its one's own heart that is guiding him towards his destination and not knowing what will happen shows that he is willing to prove his worth to her no matter what the consequences may be in the end. What I mean by this is actually doing the following things that some, most, or all guys should do, which are: 1.)Know her deep inside, not just in the physical sense; 2.) Hear every thought that she is expressing from deep within her heart and soul; 3.) See every dream she wants to come true; and 4.) Be her wings when she wants to fly high and reach for those dreams. If that's not what love is about, then tell me what is.
Yet, there comes a point within a guy's quest where he thinks that maybe he's getting in over his head about what he is doing. Its that seed of initial doubt that turns into a subsequent obstacle which grows with every fear that creeps into one's mind. Undeniably, whether its guys or girls, we all have that basic fear of being hurt emotionally either from not having one's feelings returned and/or being lied to or cheated on. Essentially, it will have a person push a possibly great relationship away because of being hurt in the past or not wanting to show the real you, which that person might not like. That fear will inevitbly turn into confusion to where one's self confidence is totally shot and the quest, which one was so fired up for in the beginning, is now either temporarily or permanently put on hold.
In some aspect, love is like falling in quicksand which is considered an obstacle that a "knight" may face on his quest. When a guy or a girl follows his or her heart, it seems as if everything is going, but then one things goes wrong and you fall in. Its that one thing that seemingly turns into a million other wrong things. For its one's own instincts that tell you to get out but the more you try and the harder you try the deeper you sink. You sink until you come to a point where you basically can't move, you can't speak, you can't scream, and finally you can't breathe. Let me ask you this question, have you ever felt this way at times or are are feeling this right now?
Johnny Depp's character Don Juan Demarco said, ~Have you never met a woman who inspires you to love? Until your every sense is filled with her? You inhale her. You taste her. You see your unborn children in her eyes and know that your heart has at last found a home. Your life begins with her, and without her it must surely end.~ For some guys they have found a woman like that and yet others are still searching. Ultimately, there are guys who say that the journey/quest to meet that someone special is an adventure in itself, which might be true. BUT getting to know her on a deeper, more intimate level by looking into her eyes and seeing what she sees, in my opinion, is the greatest adventure of all.
Without a doubt, for a guy, its that first initial step on his quest that it will lead him on journey, in which the first few steps are viewed as easy due to the fact that one's spirits are high. Its one's own heart that is guiding him towards his destination and not knowing what will happen shows that he is willing to prove his worth to her no matter what the consequences may be in the end. What I mean by this is actually doing the following things that some, most, or all guys should do, which are: 1.)Know her deep inside, not just in the physical sense; 2.) Hear every thought that she is expressing from deep within her heart and soul; 3.) See every dream she wants to come true; and 4.) Be her wings when she wants to fly high and reach for those dreams. If that's not what love is about, then tell me what is.
Yet, there comes a point within a guy's quest where he thinks that maybe he's getting in over his head about what he is doing. Its that seed of initial doubt that turns into a subsequent obstacle which grows with every fear that creeps into one's mind. Undeniably, whether its guys or girls, we all have that basic fear of being hurt emotionally either from not having one's feelings returned and/or being lied to or cheated on. Essentially, it will have a person push a possibly great relationship away because of being hurt in the past or not wanting to show the real you, which that person might not like. That fear will inevitbly turn into confusion to where one's self confidence is totally shot and the quest, which one was so fired up for in the beginning, is now either temporarily or permanently put on hold.
In some aspect, love is like falling in quicksand which is considered an obstacle that a "knight" may face on his quest. When a guy or a girl follows his or her heart, it seems as if everything is going, but then one things goes wrong and you fall in. Its that one thing that seemingly turns into a million other wrong things. For its one's own instincts that tell you to get out but the more you try and the harder you try the deeper you sink. You sink until you come to a point where you basically can't move, you can't speak, you can't scream, and finally you can't breathe. Let me ask you this question, have you ever felt this way at times or are are feeling this right now?
Johnny Depp's character Don Juan Demarco said, ~Have you never met a woman who inspires you to love? Until your every sense is filled with her? You inhale her. You taste her. You see your unborn children in her eyes and know that your heart has at last found a home. Your life begins with her, and without her it must surely end.~ For some guys they have found a woman like that and yet others are still searching. Ultimately, there are guys who say that the journey/quest to meet that someone special is an adventure in itself, which might be true. BUT getting to know her on a deeper, more intimate level by looking into her eyes and seeing what she sees, in my opinion, is the greatest adventure of all.
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